life should be great shouldnt it?

[sarahx]

hi guys, im just checking in i guess. My therapist has told me to stay away from emet related things to try get my mind off things. But i still need you guys, more than ever actually. Right now, my life should be fantastic. I have a beautiful 3yr old daughter, im 19weeks pregnant, my boyfriends learning to drive to help me lol, im doing a uni course from home. But guess what, i dont think ive everfelt worse than i do right now. I am struggling to go out of the house. im having panic attacks about everything. I cannot stop feeling sick in the evening/night time. I cant get my daughter to playschool cause it involves a 15min bus ride. I am so lonely, ive no friends at all now cause i cant get outside. I am so utterly depressed, but i dont want to go back onto anti-depressants cause of the baby. I want a home birth cause im petrified of gong to the hospital, but i cant do that if im on anti-depressants, id have to go to hospital. I am so sorry for depressin you and boring you to death. This phobia has taken over and i cant fight my way back. Im still doing CBT but this time its not helping. Every little thing panics me, my stomach gurling, burping, eating, drinking, sleeping, everything. I guess im just asking for some support, cause i have no one apart from my boyfriend and its hard for him to understand. Again, sorry for this being boring.


Sarah xxx

[Jenneh]

heya Sarah... it's good to hear from you ... even though you come with bad news [img]smileys/smilies_06.gif[/img]


i'm sorry to hear your struggling so much... if it helps at all (which it won't) emet is really getting me down too. i'm panicking over the smallest things too.


try not to be too hard on yourself. it's not ur fault ur like this - you'd go out and socialise/take ur daughter to playschool if you could. but you can't right now - it's not ur fault - and it shudnt stay this way forever.


just keep ur faith in the CBT and you never know what's around the corner.


Jen xxxxxxxx

[blood_tears]

*hugs*


i dont knwo what i can do to help, but im here to listen. im sorry things are so bad right now but just do whatever you can handle at the moment, work with the therapist and trust that things will improve. THEY WILL GET BETTER


keep the faith

[sarahx]

well, im still not coping. Things are so so bad right now. My anxiety levels are so high all of the time, even about stuff that doesnt usually affect me. I think im developin a fear of fainting too. Oh well...

[ejb199]

Hey Sarah,

im sorry things arent going too well for u emet wise- im really happy for u too tho - it seems like the other areas in ur life are going well - and look at u - pregnant!!!! [img]smileys/smilies_04.gif[/img] - u shld feel so proud. could u feel sick in the evening coz of the pregnancy perhaps? maybe that will end soon?

i totally relate to the fainting thing too - incase i faint and then come around and be sick.... [img]smileys/smilies_06.gif[/img] i think it has something to do with being in control - well for me anyways.

sarah - take care and keep us posted - email me if u want to msn - and i can add u too my work msn. im online all day if u need a chat.

big hugs
ems xx

[sage]

Sarah - I love you bud...we all do. But I'm thinking you might want to consider listening to your therapist. Coming here, although it seems to help (in that it MOMENTARILY) lessens your anxiety...may indeed be making you worse right now in the long-run.


Talk to him or her about it, and about your intense need to come here and "get help". What if the best help really is to stay away?

[sarahx]

although i enjoy coming here, and getting advice etc, i know its not good for me to depend on it. I saw my therapist today and have decided to carry on coming here as long as its not the main focus of my time. And to try not to come on when i feel bad etc!