My vomiversary

[gumdropper1]

Today I celebrate 36 years without vomiting.

That's 1878 weeks.
13,149 days.
315,576 hours.
18,934,560 minutes.
1,136,073,600 seconds -- OVER A BILLION SECONDS!

Two years 18 times.
Three years 12 times.
Four years nine times.
Six years six times.
Nine years four times.
Twelve years three times.
Eighteen years twice.

Doug

[Kazzia]

Well done - that's an amazing feat! 1976! You last v*ed a whole 9 years before I was born in 1985, which seems a long time ago in itself.

I'm hoping I can say the same as you in 2030...which would be my 36th anniversary...if I can last that long (which I doubt!)

Now keep looking ahead to 40 years!

[andee]

Awesome Doug!! Hope you're not like me, and spent most of those days, months, minutes, hours , etc WORRYING about it happening. I get mad when I think of all the time I wasted worrying. I will use your example as something really positive. Thanks!

[Erica1649]

Say what??? You have an iron stomach!! I'm kinda jealous, but happy anniversary! lol

[gumdropper1]

Now keep looking ahead to 40 years!

Thanks, but right now I'm hoping for 36 years and one day. One puke-free day at a time!

Doug

[ann32]

1 year before I was born. Congrats. Are you very cautious or do you live a normal life?

[gumdropper1]

^ Ann, I'm both. I'm careful about what I eat and practice rigorous handwashing, but I think my life is very normal. I don't think anyone I know suspects there is anything different about me. Doug

[fixxxer2012]

thats absolutely amazing. but i have to ask how many times have you come close in those years?

[gumdropper1]

Fixxer,

Twice. Once in 1977 and again in 2000.

Doug

[fixxxer2012]

Fixxer,

Twice. Once in 1977 and again in 2000.

Doug

still thats outstanding, congrats to you.

[arora]

Awesome!! Is it weird I admire that??? haha...I hope to make it that long...I'm on my 13th year!

[hairyfairy]

Awsome! I hope that one day I`ll be able to say the same!

[gumdropper1]

Good luck to both of you. I'm glad I can inspire you to have hope. Doug

[Emily42]

Wow, that is phenomenal!
I am at about 3 and a half years right now...I aspire to follow in your footsteps!! :P

[fixxxer2012]

if you think about it, it is sorta weird we admire this feat. i applaud gum on this since im an emet but if i didn't have this phobia we probably wouldn't even keep count. gum are you recovered?

[orton99]

Hmmm. With respect Doug, I’m not sure if “triumph” is the right way to describe a lengthy streak. I understand it feels that way as I used to think so myself (mine would be well over 28 years if I was still counting), but the point is that I’m now convinced that streaks are a really bad idea because they’re based on phobic avoidance.

By making such an issue of not being sick and lasting as long as you can between bouts of illness – or even trying to go the rest of your life without it happening again – you’re saying to yourself that being sick must be a really bad thing as you’re putting so much effort into not wanting it to happen and that is exactly how phobias start. Indeed, if I think back to my childhood this is probably how mine started. I was ill over my 5th birthday and so resolved to go as long as I could without being sick again. As it happened I went over three years but then got increasingly frustrated as I couldn’t even manage a year until either of the next two, all the while unwittingly placing more and more importance on not being sick. I don’t think it’s a coincidence that my fear of it increased in tandem, as I was okay with the sickness at 8, semi-okay at 9 (actually saying to an aunt that although I couldn’t stand the feeling sick the actual being sick wasn’t so bad) but then panicked for the first time when I was ill at 10.

For the record that was on 30th June 1983 although I don’t want any praise and am instead illustrating that this is what I’m walking away from and dismissing as self-defeating. I no longer care because it’s not helping me recover!

I do understand where you’re coming from, but think pride in streaks is misguided. It may look like a good thing at first glance but it’s all just a cruel illusion that’s maintaining your fear so you’re better off without it. In fact, what streaks really tell you is that it’s been all these years and you’re still as phobic as ever and that, surely, isn’t something to be happy about.

Sage’s mantra is that to be normal you have to act normal and everyone should always be asking themselves, “Would a non-phobic do this?” I mean, does anyone really think that non-emets nurture streaks?

[CathyDavies]

well done! I'm on my 15th. I'm only 17, 18 in a week.
I would love some help to find out how I can just have one day in my life where I wake up and think about something other than "do I feel sick? is there any symptoms today of illness?"
but well done all the same...
Cathy x

[fixxxer2012]

Hmmm. With respect Doug, I’m not sure if “triumph” is the right way to describe a lengthy streak. I understand it feels that way as I used to think so myself (mine would be well over 28 years if I was still counting), but the point is that I’m now convinced that streaks are a really bad idea because they’re based on phobic avoidance.

By making such an issue of not being sick and lasting as long as you can between bouts of illness – or even trying to go the rest of your life without it happening again – you’re saying to yourself that being sick must be a really bad thing as you’re putting so much effort into not wanting it to happen and that is exactly how phobias start. Indeed, if I think back to my childhood this is probably how mine started. I was ill over my 5th birthday and so resolved to go as long as I could without being sick again. As it happened I went over three years but then got increasingly frustrated as I couldn’t even manage a year until either of the next two, all the while unwittingly placing more and more importance on not being sick. I don’t think it’s a coincidence that my fear of it increased in tandem, as I was okay with the sickness at 8, semi-okay at 9 (actually saying to an aunt that although I couldn’t stand the feeling sick the actual being sick wasn’t so bad) but then panicked for the first time when I was ill at 10.

For the record that was on 30th June 1983 although I don’t want any praise and am instead illustrating that this is what I’m walking away from and dismissing as self-defeating. I no longer care because it’s not helping me recover!

I do understand where you’re coming from, but think pride in streaks is misguided. It may look like a good thing at first glance but it’s all just a cruel illusion that’s maintaining your fear so you’re better off without it. In fact, what streaks really tell you is that it’s been all these years and you’re still as phobic as ever and that, surely, isn’t something to be happy about.

Sage’s mantra is that to be normal you have to act normal and everyone should always be asking themselves, “Would a non-phobic do this?” I mean, does anyone really think that non-emets nurture streaks?

i agree with this post.

[gumdropper1]

Orton, you don't need to rain on my parade. Anyway, you have contradicted what you wrote in your navel-gazing post about streaks last year: "my streak was snapped at 27 years, 6 weeks and is now gone forever." Remember, you were going to pretend that your streak ended the night you almost threw up. But now you are waving 30 June 1983 again.

I'm happy for you if you choose not to celebrate your vomiversary or pretend it doesn't exist. But don't belittle me and the many others who choose to celebrate ours.

Doug

[fixxxer2012]

Orton, you don't need to rain on my parade. Anyway, you have contradicted what you wrote in your navel-gazing post about streaks last year: "my streak was snapped at 27 years, 6 weeks and is now gone forever." Remember, you were going to pretend that your streak ended the night you almost threw up. But now you are waving 30 June 1983 again.

I'm happy for you if you choose not to celebrate your vomiversary or pretend it doesn't exist. But don't belittle me and the many others who choose to celebrate ours.

Doug

doug i don't think anyone is putting you down. but in all reality normal people do not keep count of how long they have gone since V. im happy for you because im a fellow emet but i think in a way it isn't healthy for you to be soo proud of this. i guess my question is, if you did V lets say today how hard would that be for you to accept?

[orton99]

Doug, firstly I wasn’t trying to belittle anybody with my reply and was simply pointing out that I don’t think streaks are beneficial and explaining why as a means of, believe it or not, trying to help. Why else do you think I assured you twice that I did understand your view even if I disagreed with it and then used the phrase, “you’re better off without it”? I’m sorry if you don’t see it that way but to me saying that I hoped your streak continued forever would have been the unhelpful response. I’ve seen some of your posts expressing anxiety about “winter noro season” and I do sympathise as I know that this phobia can be very scary, but on the other hand you’ve always come across as a well-read, educated individual so I’m a bit puzzled that you don’t seem to be seeing the link between the anxiety and placing huge importance, what looks like every single day, on not being sick. Anyway, I expressed all that as politely and constructively as I could and actually drafted and reworded a few times before posting as I didn’t want to come across as too critical.

Secondly, yes, I did post last year about a very near miss in 2010 and how I thought that would be a good opportunity to regard my streak as over, but didn’t mention it in my reply here just for simplicity’s sake. Sorry if that sounded a little inconsistent with what I wrote a while ago, although I wasn’t wrong in citing 1983 as strictly speaking that was the last time I was actually sick. However, I don’t think it matters anyway as my wider point hasn’t changed, that I used to have a very long streak going but have now given it up. Put that way, I think the exact length of the streak I’m dismissing is neither here nor there.

By saying how long mine used to be I was suggesting that people don’t have to feel imprisoned by a streak – “I’ve had mine for so long and it matters so much that having it spoilt is just unthinkable” – and that you can walk away from it.

[paulinek]

Orton, you don't need to rain on my parade. Anyway, you have contradicted what you wrote in your navel-gazing post about streaks last year: "my streak was snapped at 27 years, 6 weeks and is now gone forever." Remember, you were going to pretend that your streak ended the night you almost threw up. But now you are waving 30 June 1983 again.

I'm happy for you if you choose not to celebrate your vomiversary or pretend it doesn't exist. But don't belittle me and the many others who choose to celebrate ours.

Doug

hear hear!! (or is it here here?! i've never written it down before!)

Don't let anyone dampen your celebration, i think your vomiversary (love that btw) is an amazing thing, emet or not. And for the record some non emets do know how long it is since they were last sick if it has been an exceptionally long time, maybe not down to the day but in years, i'd have to ask her for the exact amount of years but for my mum it is over 20 years and she is not emet in any way shape or form and eats out all the time.

There's nothing so annoying as an emet who considers themself recovered coming over all sanctimonious, if someone is cured either leave the site or stay to offer genunine support to someone for the level of suffering they are at with their emet - if it was as simple as people just snapping out of it or acting normal then there wouldn't be the thousands of people on here that there are.


Here's to another 36 years Doug

[KaydeeJayde]

No one was coming over sanctimonious. I yhink you guys are being a little too defensive.

Doug, its great that you're so proud of it, so congrats, i guess. Thats the original reason i came on this thread.

Orton, i agree with you for the most part, but im fast learning that some people arent interested in recovery at this point and because of that, everyone regards different 'controversial' emet behaviours (such as counting streaks) in different ways.

[paulinek]

No one was coming over sanctimonious. I yhink you guys are being a little too defensive.

Doug, its great that you're so proud of it, so congrats, i guess. Thats the original reason i came on this thread.

Orton, i agree with you for the most part, but im fast learning that some people arent interested in recovery at this point and because of that, everyone regards different 'controversial' emet behaviours (such as counting streaks) in different ways.

Ok, on reflection maybe Orton copped the full force of my annoyance which is a little unfair, but there are 2 or 3 members on here recently who just seem to be coming accross holier than thou because they feel they are recovered but they seem to have forgotten what it is like to be in the depths of despair with emet and are coming accross in a very preachy fashion which isn't very constructive IMO. And I do consider myself as recovered as i am going to get, but i still remember what it was like to be bad with it and a, aware i could relapse at any time, so am not cocky about it.

I still think it was mean to put a dampener on someones thread that they are obviously so happy about though but we're all entitled to our opinion i guess.

[kaiilyn_23]

Doug, that is amazing. I was at 11 years until whatever is happening with my stomach wrecked it. But still, I haven't had a stomach virus since I was 2 years old, and I'm almost 14 now. Hoping I can restart and go another 11 years vomit free, although truthfully the thought doesn't bother me as much anymore.

I don't think that streaks are always from phobic avoidance. My father is in no way afraid of vomit or vomiting... he's 48, and he hasn't vomited since he was 15 (and very drunk,). I know it's different as we're emets, but I don't know, not everybody is generally a vomiter, like my dad and others. I'm probably contradicting myself (I'm still slightly zonked from morphine and other sedatives...) and misconstruing somethings, so if that's the case... I'm sorry. But I don't think it's always generally a phobic avoidance.

Anyway, congratulations Doug that's just amazing! Just think, 4 more years and you can say 40 years.

[emmalou]

Ugh I'm at ONE year vomit free...

[orton99]

I certainly wasn’t trying to be mean or churlish in saying what I did and am sorry if it came across that way, although I think that I and most of the other posters on this thread are just going to have to disagree on this subject. I see a streak is a symptom of this horrible anxiety disorder called emetophobia, so to me saying that you hope someone’s streak continues forever is no different to saying that you hope they stay phobic and scared forever and I’d never wish that on anybody. Put that way, I’d argue that to wish someone well with their streak is probably the cruellest thing you can say to an emetophobe and that's why I’m not saying it. Ever heard of killing someone with kindness?

It’s such a shame that saying all that is seen as controversial on this board. There’s hardly any gainsaying that IES is full of genuinely unhappy and in extreme cases desperate people whose lives are being made a misery by emetophobia. Reading some of their pleas for relief from it is really heartbreaking and yet take the opportunity to point out that some of the behaviours associated with this phobia may not be helping and this is what happens. I don’t know, you tell me. Should I laugh, cry or just bang my head against the nearest brick wall?

(And kaiilyn, if I may disagree with you, I think we’re talking about different things. If your Dad hasn’t been sick for over 30 years then fair enough, but what I’ve been talking about is a streak as a deliberate thing that you try and build and so makes your phobia worse. If your Dad isn’t emetophobic – and I hope for his sake he’s not – then I don’t think it’s even a streak at all, more just a long run of good luck!)

One last thing that strikes me is that I think there is one genuinely supportive thing that someone could say to Doug or indeed anyone with a streak that really does have their best interests at heart yet no-one’s said it so far (although fixxer possibly hinted at it in one of his replies) and it’s this : “I hope that by the next time your ‘anniversary’ comes around you won’t be marking it because you’ll have had treatment, been cured, won’t be phobic anymore and so won’t care”.

If even that is regarded as controversial then I think everyone here should be asking some very hard questions about how on earth a board meant to support emetophobes has reached such a point, that wishing someone might one day recover has, incredibly, become the wrong thing to say.

[paulinek]

I [FONT=Georgia]
If even that is regarded as controversial then I think everyone here should be asking some very hard questions about how on earth a board meant to support emetophobes has reached such a point, that wishing someone might one day recover has, incredibly, become the wrong thing to say.

There's nothing wrong whatsoever in wishing that we all recover and you will find that people support that all the time, however there is a time, place and way of saying things that maybe doesn't rub people up the wrong way so much - and that's not directed specifically at you, it is a general comment.

And if amongst all the doom, gloom and despair someone is happy about something then why not pat them on the back for it - and remember that not everyone wishes to be "cured" some people are living absolutely normal happy lives but taking sensible measures to prevent being sick and as a result of that some of them have managed to go extraordinary lengths of time without vomiting.

[andee]

What about people who quit smoking or drinking and say that it's been x years since they last smoked or drank? Kind of the same thing...still something to celebrate...Go Doug!

[KaydeeJayde]

Um, really? Smoking and drinking are bad for you. Vomiting is an inevitable thing. Making a streak out of not vomiting is unhealthy feeding of a phobia, making a streak out of not drinking or smoking is living a healthier life.