Ok, I don't know what to do anymore. I used to be able to "deal" with my emet for a long time. I would have my little freak outs, but NOTHING like this. I wash my hands all the time, wash my desk at work all the time and still freak out whenever I hear anything about the noro! I getting mad at myself. I should not let this freak me out so much! It has gotten to the point where I freaked myself out so bad, I stayed home on Friday. Today, I come into work and my boss told me that I hope that I feel better because people are starting to notice that I have been out a lot lately. Well, most of it has been me doing it to myself (freaking out about not wanting to v* so I don't eat-I don't eat, so I become n*/light headed/dizzy). I want to have kids, but I am really ready to say I can't do it and go back on my anti-depressants. I can't keep doing this to myself. And now it is affecting my work life, let alone my home life! I have an appt with my therapist tomorrow...hoping that will help some, but I don't know what to do any more. I try to keep myself busy and not think/listen about this nasty bug going around. I try to think positive and say that we are at the peak so it can only go down from here. I try to remember how people tell me they had an issue with v* and had kids and it "goes away" or they learned to deal with it. But I am so scared to say ok, I can do it, have a child, they v* for the first time and then loose it. I can't give it back! My husband knows how I feel, my parents know how I feel, but I can't listen any more to "Well, tell yourself you are going to fine and then drop it". There is no "dropping it" in this girls mind! I am 28, I shouldn't be freaking out. I have lost interest in going anywhere, eating out, doing anything but stay at home and sleep. I want to get over this, but I am so afraid that the "therapy" is going to be looking and hearing someone v*. Nope, can't do it!
What do you folks do to that have found ways to live with this? Have anyone tried the "Overcoming your fear of v*" that I see in the upper corner of my screen every time I sign onto this page? Please, help me!