Advice needed asap???

[guardgirl95]

Hi. I'm new here, but I'm 16 and I've had emetophobia ever since I was around 7 or 8. Recently, I've been dealing with anxiety attacks. It feels like a bad cycle, because my attacks make me feel nauseous, which causes me to panic even more. Its gotten so bad that my eating habits have changed and I'm losing too much weight (I'm already small as is). My parents tell me that its all in my head, and that I need to face my fears and v* if I feel the need to, but I can't bring myself to do it. I feel like I'm losing control of myself. What should I do?

[EmmaO]

Hi there. I'm 21 and also have suffered from emetophobia and anxiety and panic attacks for as long as I can remember. I always, always feel n* when I get panic attacks (which is quite frequently) and it's a vicious thought cycle - am I n* because I'm panicking, or am I panicking because I'm n* and going to vomit? My parents, also, do not understand. They can't wrap their head around my fear. I'm going to copy and paste something I posted on another thread:

I recently went to an intensive therapy clinic to help with this - although it did not focus on my phobia, it did help with certain aspects of my anxiety. Here are some things I found most helpful:

1. Square breathing - breathe in through your nose for four seconds, hold for four, release gently from your mouth for four. Repeat in series of four. This will calm your nervous system and also distract you because you are focused on counting. It will also quell n*.

2. Distractions - your fear is controlling everything, distractions will help transfer your focus from that to something else. There are many different techniques - counting tiles in bathrooms, naming 5 items in whatever room your in, then name another 5. What I find most helpful are games on my phone (scramble with friends is my personal go-to). It's fast moving and will immediately draw your focus elsewhere. At first, it can be very hard to focus on something else, but keep trying and your focus will move from fear to something else, allowing your body to relax.

3. Thought stopping techniques. This takes a little practice but it works for 80% of people who suffer from phobias and panic. The way it was taught to me was to set an alarm for three minutes, for those three minutes, focus on what you're afraid of (I will usually sit there and say over and over again "I'm scared of v*. I'm scared I have a sv*. I'm scared I'm sick"). Don't pay attention to the time so that way when the alarm goes off it startles you. As soon as your hear that alarm shout "STOP" as loud as you can (it can be difficult depending on your living situation - I once had my dad run into my room asking what was going on). Even just saying "STOP" softly but forcefully will work. It is also suggested that when you hear that alarm you snap your wrist with a hair tie or pinch yourself. After that - replace the negative thought with a different one... which will bring me to my fourth suggestion.

4. Logic. I am so extremely afraid of v* - but I haven't in years. How many times have I had panic attacks and been afraid that I was going to v* and didn't? I haven't v* from a sv* in 12 years. Logic says I will be fine. Then I go to statistics: one study says that the average non-emet reported having v* 5 months earlier. For emets - it's 12.5 years. Most sufferers of emetophobia claimed to have been sick 6.5 times in their entire lives. Logic is on your side that you will be just fine.
Now, I get this is much larger than statistics - I don't want to have to be afraid of being sick. It is a normal thing and it shouldn't be terrifying. I, however, am not a professional, just a fellow sufferer, and these are techniques that I have employed during moments of panic. I can't promise success, but I say they're all worth a shot.

I also have the same fears of you about one day starting a family. What would I do if my child got sick? My husband? I went through a very bad period of time a few months ago - I was extremely depressed, lost a lot of weight very quickly, spent upwards of 20 hours a day in bed, completely isolated myself from family and friends. I realized, however, all this did was perpetuate was cyclical thoughts. After the clinic, I'm now out of the house for 10 hours a day, going out with friends, trying new things, and I find that I don't focus on my phobia while doing this. It was hard at first - but I went to a party one night, was very anxious all night, but came home and realized - I made it! Nothing bad happened. Experience builds confidence. It also helps to have at least one person to turn to. I have one friend who I know I can call at 4am and cry and cry and just say over and over again "I'm so scared I'm going to v*". She doesn't truly understand my phobia, but she doesn't judge me and she is willing to be there for me, and she comforts me and I almost always feel better.

They're really all worth a shot to try out - even if they're hard at first. Panic and anxiety is so hard, especially when anxiety makes you feel n*. It's genuinely awful, but it doesn't have to be debilitating and it's all about gaining control over your thoughts so they don't control you. I havevn't quite mastered it yet - but I keep trying.

[EmmaO]

I copied more than I meant to on that previous post, sorry about that

[hannahb]

Hey, I'm also new here. I'm 19 and have had emetophobia for most of my life but it seems to have got much worse as I've got older. I'm also small too, and in the past I've lost weight due to the fear of being s*. I'm a bit stuck as to what to do aswell to be honest, but it's quite nice knowing that other people like you also have this fear. If you don't mind me asking, do you have any habits because of the fear of being s*? I have so so many, and I feel like its just me x

[harmony18]

im 27 and am very small to.i dont eat enought and im not a healthy waight.i take meal replacement milk shakes but eat solid to.the shakes are amazing and high in carbs and protin.dont buy the small tubs from a shop.u can get big tubs of body builders sites.ebay is great.i went from waighing 7 stone to 8 and a half in 2 mthsvof drinking one milk shake.if the doctor thinks your to under waight they will give you them so its cheaper.with ur anxitey maybe see the doc or have cbt therapy.hang in there

[guardgirl95]

I cant really think of any habits tht I have, other than always being paranoid. My phobia only really bothers me when I know one of my classmates is sick, or if I'm on a long car ride with other people. And I recently bought some Ensure nutrition shakes, so I'll see how those work. My doctor wants to see me again in a month to check my weight, so wish me luck! And thanks to everyone for all of the support so far. Much love <3

[PhoenyxAngel]

Hi. I'm new here, but I'm 16 and I've had emetophobia ever since I was around 7 or 8. Recently, I've been dealing with anxiety attacks. It feels like a bad cycle, because my attacks make me feel nauseous, which causes me to panic even more. Its gotten so bad that my eating habits have changed and I'm losing too much weight (I'm already small as is). My parents tell me that its all in my head, and that I need to face my fears and v* if I feel the need to, but I can't bring myself to do it. I feel like I'm losing control of myself. What should I do?

This is usually spoken out of ignorance by others who have no idea how real this fear is. I've gotten sick in the past and no, I did not get over my fear by "facing" it. And other emets have done the same and are still afraid of it. That's NOT the way to get rid of the fear. Sorry, I just hate when people say things like that. They obviously have no idea what they're talking about.

As for what you can do: therapy and medication does help to lessen the fear. And the techniques that EmmaO posted do help. My therapist told me about some of those techniques (specifically the breathing one) and it does help with panic/anxiety attacks.

[harmony18]

ah that is great..glad to here you hae some shakes..if you snake solids aswell you will put on waight..i burn food of so fast that even when i do eat well i cant put waight on and the shakes work for me..good luck but i dont think you will need it

i completely agree with you phoenysangel...v* only makes my fear worse!

[PhoenyxAngel]

I mean, exposure therapy and desensitization does work for some. But in those cases the person is slowly easing into exposure to v* to become desensitized to the fear. You can't just go right into it and v* and expect it to cure your fears. It just doesn't work that way.