Hi there - I’m new, with a story...

[alcathradiel]

I'm emetophobic. I've only known what this is for about three years now
- before that, I just felt like I was crazy. Never talked about it, but
I adopted all of the "weird" emetophobic habits... like using the
bathroom stall farthest from the door, being meticulous with food
hygiene, flushing toilets with my feet, avoiding public transportation,
no roller coasters, no drinking, etcetera.



I had an episode on Saturday that turned out really suck. I'm going to copy it directly from my LiveJournal.



My grandfather has cancer and is doing
chemotherapy, which most of you probably know makes you v- a LOT.



A whole bunch of my family came in for the weekend, because it's my grandma's 75th birthday.



We went out for supper, which was a stupid idea because grandpa isn't doing so well, he can barely walk, too.



Before the appetizers came, grandpa v-. I know wasn't his fault.



But I had a panic attack and spent the rest of the evening out on the restaurant's porch, shivering.



Mom yelled at me in front of the whole restaurant, calling me melodramatic and an insensitive jerk.



She doesn't believe that emetophobia is a real phobia. I've shown her
websites, tried to explain it - she thinks I'm just exaggerating for
attention. Yeah. Like I enjoy being yelled at in front of a hundred
people.



I feel absolutely horrible because I panicked and put my grandfather on
the spot. I can't talk to him about it because he's not an easy person
to talk to, and we've never been extremely close - but he only has a
few months left to live.



I'm confused as to what I can do about my parents... especially my mother.

[danforth]

that's really horrible dude. if my mum was like that to me i don't know what i'd do. i'm really lucky i have support from my parents and girlfriend. i think you're mum needs to come onto these forums or something similar and have a look that this isn't fake. We are real people and the fear is as real as it gets. All i can say is be persistant and hopefully she'll see what you're going through. Best of luck.[img]smileys/smilies_01.gif[/img]

[jennyleigh1975]

Sorry to hear about your grandpa. Is this your mothers dad? If she is under all the stress of dealing with a sick parent, that may be why she is treating you like she is. She may be thinking, geez, I am dealing with all this, and now my son is going to weird out on me. Dont get me wrong, I know exactly how you feel and I am not trying to sound sarcastic with what I am saying. There are several people in my family that dont understand my phobia. Maybe when your grandpa is better, you can sit down with your family and try explaining your phobia to them.

Also, there are several new drugs out for nausea and vomiting avalible here in the US, that less people get sick from the chemo. Two ladies that I know, had chemo and didnt get sick. Well, one of them did with the last treatment, but that was it. Are they giving your grandpa anything to try and ward off the nausea and vomiting?

Welcome to the site!!!!

[helsbels]

Yes a big welcome... I'm sorry that you've had that experience and you're going through a difficult time with your grandfather being so ill. I think it's really difficult for people who don't understand the phobia to understand the reaction. Maybe with your grandfather being so ill you could just apologise to him and say you were having a really bad day or something like that and reassure him that it was nothing to do with him that upset you but then sit down with your mom and have a really good talk to her about the real reason for your reaction? I can empathise because I have never spoken to my parents about this either, I'm 29 now and only found out about this about 3 years ago too and I really envy people who have relationships with their family where they can discuss this and get help for it. But, having said that, I've managed to cope with not knowing about it / feeling a freak / not talking to people about it for so long and I seem to be doing OK so try not to feel too down about it. You'll find a lot of people here with different experiences to talk about but the main thing is, we all understand where you're coming from and you can talk to us.

[blackrainbow]

I';m sorry to hear about your mother's reaction. Don't let her make you feel like you are doing something wrong. I know it's hard but stand up for it. It's a real problem, and all these people on this site just prove it's not an isolated problem. If she won't believe it, then she won't believe it.


Try to make a point of visiting your grandfather but do it at a time when he's less liekly to be sick. Like right before his treatment. That way you show yo still care, and your mother doesn't think you're being insensitive.


If worse comes to worse, talk to your grandfather about your problem. MAaybe he would understand better then your mother. Make a compromise, like visiting him for a fe wminutes at a time, but more often. As long as he knows why, and knows you are making an effort.


Tara

[jennyleigh1975]

Something else I meant to tell you also was that when my grandfather was sick (he had cancer also) I was afraid to go and visit him because I was afraid he would get sick and vomit in front of me. I felt bad about this for a long time, but that is because I was close to him. I agree with blackrainbow, try to go see him when he is less likely to be sick.