rough day

[alesh31]

I think that my anxiety has reached an all-time high this week, and I'm not really sure why. I have been hyper aware of what I've been eating--usually I only do this with dinner (something about being more afraid at night) but now, it's transferred over to EVERYTHING I eat. I'm always wondering if what I'm about to eat will make me sick in some way or another, whether it's food poisoning or maybe I touched it with dirty hands. I've never been a germ-o-phobe (totally spelled that oddly) but today I was about to eat a bagel and I had to leave my bagel and go rush to wash my hands before--which is something you should do, but usually I'd just eat it and be fine anyway.

I'm concerned with how bad it's getting. I've been seeing a therapist and she referred me to a psychiatrist, whom I met with today, and she prescribed me for celexa. I've never taken any form of anti-depressant and I'm really worried. She put me on the lowest dosage and told me to cut it in half for the first four days (because I have a small frame), but being prescribed medicine makes me feel like things are getting out of hand. I also have OCD, which is the main reason I was prescribed this. I know that I'm taking a step in the right direction, I'm just scared and upset that I have allowed my thoughts and anxieties to get this far.

Tonight for dinner, my roommate and I had chicken. The sell-by date is the 28th, so I know it's fine but the package had already been opened from a previous night, and the chicken was uncovered in the fridge. The raw chicken had a hard, rough texture on some parts and it freaked me out, but it didn't smell and my roommate said it was fine. We ate it about a half hour ago, and almost right after we ate it, my stomach started bothering me and I had d*. She was fine, and still is.

Do you think this could just be from all the anxiety I've been experiencing? I can't believe my fears have taken me this far. My roommate probably thinks I'm psychotic!

[ditchy_jon]

Anxiety is a way of you keeping control over an phobia you have. Aslong as the chicken was cooked throughly it will be fine. Food Poisioning, is bacterial or viral based, two things that are killed immediately when you ensure there are no pink bits in teh chicken.

[tsos82]

I can totally relate to where you are coming from. Over the last year or so my OCD and germaphobia has gotten so bad that I do question what I'm eating, I'm a date checker or the use by checker. I wash my hands before I eat but while I'm eating if I touch something I usually have to use some hand sanitizer before I can touch my food again. It has progressed to a point where I have cut a lot of foods out of my diet, I've lost weight this year quite a lot actually, but I am seeing a therapist which I think may have triggered some feelings and emotions that may have been contributing to this progressive worry of food and what not. I wish anxiety/ocd/emetophobia/germaphobia didn't go hand in hand but it seems very much intertwined. What helps me is just reassuring myself that I'm fine, and that its just my anxiety trying to get the best of me. I keep myself busy after eating to keep my mind off of it. I will do laundry or cleaning just to stay occupied and it does help. It can get overwhelming and frustrating but you aren't the only one having these thoughts trust me! Hope you feel better.