Step mum with major Emetophobia

[Greta1074]

My step sons are lovely and before I had my little one were 100% my focus. We have them half the week and its hard for them. They are 6&8. Their mum has always sent them to us, to school or to the childminder ill. They rarely vomit. Until last year I managed when they did. Now I feel they will make my little year boy sick because of how little their natural mum looks after them.
This morning she texted that one vomited this morning and she wanted to send them down to us. I worry about this all the time. I'm scared of them vomiting whey they are here unttil they leave again. I can't sleep I can't eat. I'm terrified. My husband called her and said that she had to keep him with her and later we would get them. It's best for anyone who isn't well to stay at home with their mum. Not be dragged to their other house right after they've been sick!! She insisted she has work to do and was annoyed.
Wjy doesn't a mum want to mother her kids? Their grandparent are the same and rarely look after them I'm so upset that I wonder how I can stay in this situation. I feel attacked. I'm in a CBT program that suggests I stay here but I want to leave and go to my other flat with my baby. It's not the best option but it cures my anxiety. Help. I'm a terrible step mum. They just get so upset that I leave when they say they are feeling poorly or are sick. I just go. It's awful. I left them down.

[Ana Bellini]

You are not a terrible step mum. You are emet, that's different. I say, tell everyone about your phobia. You don't have to explain everything, just say: I have a vomiting phobia and cannot take care of a sick child. I'm sorry.

Well, maybe she really has work to do, or maybe she doesn't care about them so much. Maybe that's why she's not married with your husband anymore. Anyway, they are your step sons now. If you really think you can't handle it, ask your husband to do so and stay in your flat, but I'd try to help the sick boy. Maybe it was something he ate.

If it is noro, it's simple: Make the sick boy wash his hands and brush his teeth after vomiting. You (or your husband) should bleach the bathroom when he is done with vomiting, to be sure. If it is the flu, that's harder, but wash your hands and his hands too.

I hope he doesn't vomit anymore. Good luck.