Hey Guys! I'm Kaye Jackson. I'm 19 years old, I have a son that's almost 2 and I'm marrying the man of my DREAMS in two months <3 But, I am an emet (as I've seen it called on this site). I live in constant fear of anyone that I see. I am scared at all times that someone will just v* for no reason at all every single day of my life. When I was younger, I remember always being scared of v*. I used to wake my mother up in the middle of the night just for her to come help me not get sick. I would do everything I could. My mother would put cold water on the back of my neck and on my forehead and I would get sick and freak out! The worst was when I was in the 5th grade, a couple kids found out that I was TERRIFIED of v* when a few kids had a s* v* and I freaked out. After that day they would taunt me and torment me and make noises and gestures and even to go as far as buying fake v* from gag stores and messing with me and putting food in their mouths and spitting it out pretending to be sick. I was so miserable and no one ever helped... no one ever cared... I was so sad and alone and no one understood. I formed habits or rituals to help me out when I'm feeling sick. I'm a pot head, plain and simple and this is one of the things that has saved my sanity, but this is where it gets tricky. I love to smoke, but I find it difficult smoking with others. I'm scared one coughing fit will go too far and someone will throw up all over my house or my bathroom and they can't control it! It's really dumb I know but marijuana helps with my stomach. I've been nauseous at LEAST once a day since I can remember... I use gum and mints to soothe. I go through tums and pepto like CRAZY and if I smoke one small joint.. I don't usually have to use anything.. Do you guys have any rituals when you feel like you're getting sick? If I feel like I'm going to v* I always run my hands under cold water, breath, try to find somewhere cold to breath (I even go as far as sticking my face in the freezer), chew some gum, walk around and take DEEEEEEP breaths, pray... Go outside and breathe, pace... pace... pace... and NEVER LOOK DOWN! It's almost like I feel it rising and I'm forcing it down... I have always wanted to know if other people are like me... If I really am crazy or if I'm really suffering from pure evil fear! I don't know. I hope someone replies, or I'm gonna feel really dumb. This is my first thread so... be honest, and what's your rituals? your stories? your visions? your nightmares? (every single time I have a nightmare someone v* and I can't run from them because of various dumb reasons) XOXOX Kaye