I want to be successful... but emetophobia/anxiety is holding me back?

[wreackinghavoc]

Hey guys. I'm sorry this post is long... but I'm desperate for advice so if you could read and respond, it'd be much appreciated. I tried to keep it as short as possible.

Some background info...
I've been living with emetophobia and anxiety issues for about four years now. It's not vomiting that bothers me OR seeing someone else vomit, it's just the fear of vomiting in public. When I'm in public, the slightest feeling of discomfort in my stomach sends me into full blown panic mode and I CAN'T calm myself down. Even if it's just gas pains or something, I'll panic and start feeling nauseous, shaking, and need to get OUT of that situation as quickly as possible. On top of the emetophobia, I also suffered with IBS (irritable bowel syndrome) issues for a while. I have learned to control my symptoms with a healthy diet, but I'm still scared of having an "attack" in public and not being near a bathroom. I know it's an irrational fear since I no longer experience symptoms now that I eat healthy. I don't know why I'm still so scared of it happening. I'm also freaked out about being in places where I feel "trapped" and wouldn't be able to "escape" without drawing attention to myself. I just feel really, really, really uncomfortable when I'm around people. When I'm by myself, I'm completely calm, and I don't worry about my stomach problems at all.

I dropped out of high school at age 16 because of my issues. I regret that decision every single day. Back then, I had issues, but somehow I dealt with them. I made some stupid choices (like forcing myself to throw up every morning before school, so that I felt "empty" for the rest of the day), but at least I was able to function like a normal person. Since I've been homebound for so long, it has gotten MUCH worse. I've been through counseling and stuck with it for months. I don't feel that it helped at all. I have tried two different medications (one was Prozac, I can't remember the other). Prozac helped for a while and the other didn't help at all.

I'm 19 years old now... no diploma, no job, no car, no nothing. I sit at home 24/7 and as the days go by I feel more and more depressed. All of my friends/cousins are in college or working, moving into their own place, etc... and I'm just here at home every day. I feel like a complete loser and it's embarrassing when someone asks, "what do you do for fun? do you have a job? are you going to school?"

After browsing several different threads on here and other forums, I know there are other people who suffer with the same issues. So, HOW do you deal with it and function like a normal person? Obviously I can't live the rest of my life like this.

Help.

[wreackinghavoc]

Btw.. sorry if this is in the wrong "section" or whatever... I'm new here lol o.o

[musicfan92]

i wish i could offer you some advice, but i have been (and still kind of am) in a similar situation as you. my emetophobia/anxiety wasn't that bad back in high school, so i graduated 2 years ago. i work part-time now and have taken some classes at community college. i struggle with the same thing as you though; i can't stand being "stuck" in a place and having no way out without causing a big scene. i start feeling nauseous and panicking.

but i'll try to offer some advice... i'm great at giving advice but can never use my own advice.. haha. i know everything is easier said than done. if i were you, i'd try to get a part-time job somewhere. i like my job (even though it's retail) because i am up moving around most of the time and not sitting in one place. this kind of keeps me distracted so i don't panic. i can pretty much do what i want most of the time, so if i need to run to the bathroom i can. this helps just because i know i can escape if i need to. i know getting a job (going to an interview, etc.) will probably be difficult for you, but it would be a major step. maybe if you can get a job, then it would help you get to a point where you could go back to school or take some classes and get a GED/diploma.

i know finding a job and going to work seems impossible, but if you could start doing that and just work 20 hours a week or so, that would be a major accomplishment for you and would likely lead to success in other areas. like you said, you can't keep living your life like you are now. i know this probably won't help (it doesn't help me), but it's important to remember people rarely get sick.. and when they do, they rarely vomit. it's just something we panic about whenever we hear it, but most people i know haven't thrown up in many years. so it's not something that happens often. you can go to work and be healthy and live normal. it's all in your mind if you think you can't.

good luck, and report back and let us know how you're doing!