It's official, my anxiety has made me a total biotch

[Erica1649]

So tonight is the night. We are going to that standing room only concert tonight. I have been in such a foul mood about it. I'm on the verge of tears. I almost got into a little argument with my husband over it this morning. I was hoping that we could drive ourselves to the show, but it looks like we are meeting at my brother-in-laws house and then getting dinner before the show! I think I am going to pop an Ativan for my anxiety. I'm already anxious as hell about it...I am realizing that I really don't like being in large crowds like that. When its a concert where you can sit, I don't mind it as much. I hate this phobia. This time of the year gives me the heebies too, not to mention this is in a bar setting. I'm crossing my fingers that I don't have to use the bathroom at all at this place because this place's bathrooms are disgusting .....I've packed my had sanitizer already and guess just gotta hope for the best. I hope this horror I'm picturing in my mind isn't as bad as I'm making it out to be. If I'm uncomfortable I can just step outside for a bit right? I really wish it was spring time and they days were longer. There is nothing worse for me than having this phobia, mixed with the cold, mixed with the days getting dark early. I really hate myself this time of the year....sorry to be a Debbie Downer, but you guys are the only ones who truly understand. I'm sure I will end up having a good time, it's just actually getting me out there is the tough part....

[sarahh]

I'm sure that youll have a great time! l always get panicky about concerts too, what helps me is to feel prepared, so I take my anxiety meds, a plastic bag should the worst happen and just remember that if it all gets too much you can step out (everyone will be busy having fun inside) and have some time to yourself. Im sure that you will be careful with handwashing etc and even if you have to use the loo it doesn’t mean you will get ill from them J have a great night! xx

[Grace47]

Sounds like fun. I'm glad you're pushing yourself to do a something outside your comfort zone.

[Erica1649]

Oh lovely the guy near me looks like he's having a panic attack....or tripping balls....fml I wish he would go away haha

[Erica1649]

Well, night ruined...I was in a great spot, away from people and he comes this drunk ass girl stumbling all over the place....long story short my brother and laws girlfriend nd I are next door at a coffee shop because I started having a panic attack. I wanna cry so bad right now. I hate myself, I'm such a chicken

[Grace47]

*hugs* even a journey of a thousand miles requires a first step and you've taken it. Remember drunk v is only gross - not contagious.

[sarahh]

Even if the evening didn’t go entirely to plan I think you should still be proud of yourself for going! You pushed yourself into a situation you are far from comfortable in and that is the only way to a recovery. Look at things in a positive light, don’t look at what went wrong. 😃

[Erica1649]

Thanks guys. My brother in laws gf didn't wanna go in the first place...we stepped out for air, got a little coffee, then came back in and watched the las part of the show...of course an Ativan was consumed lol. The girl never got sick I assume lol....she was awful cause she was literally being dragged around by the bf her eyes close the entire time. I was almost posting she would throw up next to me. And I only moved because she was close enough to splash on me or my husband...I didn't wanna chance it. Most likely I probably would have had the urge to hit her or cuss her out...lol that would have been bad

[nikinlove927]

Good for you for going tho! I just recently conquered concerts too and I always take my meds because drunk people give me the worst anxiety!! But it sounds like you did great!

[Onnie]

OMG it is so comforting to know that I am not the only person to feel this way! I have said the same thing to myself before, I hate the winter, I hate myself for being this way and I hate that most of the people around me DONT UNDERSTAND!! I'm so happy I found this group! <3