Rough night - Hell, rough SEASON!

[NaiveAndTrue]

Recently I've been making some strides with my emet. I am completely calm and comfortable when a patient gags and v*s, even if a bit gets on me. (I'm an orthodontic tech, I take a lot of impressions.) I've found something I love more than I fear v* - Zumba. A few times now I've gone with queasies that would have kept me in the house a few years ago, and even after 2 bouts of d* on Xmas Eve morning!

Despite that, this flu season has been HELL for me! I've been having more panic attacks than usual. I had 1 bout of n* that went to a 4 in the fall (dh*ed 2 or 3 times). For a while it makes me feel calmer because the 'real' n* feeling is fresh in my mind. But I've had 1 bad night since then, and tonight so bad I actually LEFT a class half way through (Blaming it on a knee I banged yesterday. . . I'm so embarrassed!) I didn't even really feel sick to my stomach so to speak, just had that oppressive need to LEAVE NOW NOW NOW feeling.

I usually eat fresh food only, but I've been trying to save money and the Healthy Choice Steamer entree's were on sale 4 for $10 so I picked some up for work. I didn't realize that they all had soy in them (which does not get along with my innards), and that plus not being used to processed food is SHREDDING my insides. No d* but super, um, tooty and I've pooed several times. It's made me anxious and hovering around a 2 on my tummy scale (Queasy but in full panic for hours.) My brilliant self also accidentally took a Bayer Migraine instead of a Tylenol, and caffeine in pill form is NEVER good. My heart rate is stuck in the 90's like when I'm on the treadmill. I keep swinging from hot to cold, too. I did recognize that I was starving and ate a turkey sandwich, but I'm still scared that none of the above has anything to do with it, and if I fall asleep, I'm going to wake up suddenly and have to v*. I keep taking my temp and it was 98.7 the last time, so I'm freaking about that, too! lol. It's been years since I've have panic attacks at HOME. And this is my third one in the last few weeks. I. Hate. This.

I see my dr for my yearly tomorrow, and I'm going to ask him if he can put me back on Tranxene for little while. The Antivert (Bonine) isn't cutting it right now, I actually even took 2 today! Eff my brain. EFF IT!

[daffodil]

Sounds like you have made a lot of progress. Well done! Dont feel bad for having a hard time. Sometimes we struggle and feel like we are going backwards, but the important thing is that you keep trying. I hope the medication helps, and you can get some peace soon.

[cycle]

I'm going through the same thing. On the whole, my emet has been loads better in the past couple of years. However, I still have ups and downs. A down DAY is no big deal to me. It's when it becomes down DAYS or a down WEEK that I get discouraged. Right now, I'm on day 3 of being down. And I have no reason to! I just got a great new job offer and life is pretty cool. But, le sigh, emet wants to creep in and rain on my parade.

Try roy not to feel too discouraged. Winter is a tough season for everyone, and I don't know where you are but the weather has been pretty Effed up too. Don't discredit your progress and keep making strides to recovery! You can do it!