i am a bad daughter.

[jamie24]

yesterday was thanksgiving in canada, and i phone over to my
grandpaerents/aunts house to check what time to come over, and my aunt
said my mom was really ill and had been up all night throwing up. my
mom lives upstairs with my grandparents and takes care of them, if she
wasn't there, they would prob be in a nursing home, and since she was
ill, my aunt who lives downstairs had no clue what to do with their
pills etc, and asked me to come over and help. well,i was freaked out
majorly, but i went anyways, had dinner, then went upstairs to put nan
and papa to bed. i could hardly breathe, i was hyperventilating, washed
my hands every 5 minutes, and stayed away from my mom's room. then she
came out and said i have to go to the hospital. so i took her down and
stayed w/her untill the doc came and told her it was her pancreatitis
flaring up again. so in other words, serious, but not contagious. i
bawled all night because i feel so horrible for being afraid of my mom
just for being sick. she takes care of everyone else, and then she gets
sick, and has no one to take care of her. i feel like such a peice of
crap.[img]smileys/smilies_06.gif[/img][img]smileys/smilies_06.gif[/img][img]smileys/smilies_06.gif[/img]

[PhilB]

Don't feel bad!!!

I think you did an excellent job. You went there, took care of them and in the end,

things turned out ok.



We all feel like not handling things for many reasons but the important
thing is that you went and id it. You should be proud!

[jennyleigh1975]

Dont feel like crap, you took care of your mom and your grandparents, while what your fear the most was going on in the same house ............... AND you took your v'ing mom to the hospital and stayed there with her. YOU ARE AN EXCELLENT DAUGHTER AND YOU DID AND EXCELLENT JOB TAKING CARE OF EVERYONE!!!!

[babygap5]

Jamie, everyone is right, you are not a bad daughter, you did great!!! You were there to help when they needed you. Stop beating yourself up.

[bexcelica]

i second and third everything said! youre awesome dauhgter!

[gubba]

You are the best daughter. You feared it, but conquered it and what could be better???? WOW!!!


I don't know many EMETS that would have done that well, and you took care of everyone.


I'd love to have you as my daughter any single day!!!

[kellybean]

You did anAMAZING job!!! I could\would have never done that. I wouldn't have evenbeen able to go to the house in the first place, let alone accompany my mom to the er. *I* am a bad daughter. Please, give yourself a pat on the back for being able to do any of that.

[jamie24]

thank you so much you guys. you really brightened my spirits! i just
feel horrible for being so afraid of my poor mom when she was so
helpless, but i guess you are right. i could have just left her i
guess, but i didn't. i couldn't..no matter how afraid i was feeling,
cuz i love her much much more than i am afraid of the emet. she is
still in hospital, i am going to see her now, i am praying she gets
better soon..thank you again, you are all so supportive, and i know you
know how i felt, which makes it easier...YOU ALL ARE THE BEST!!!!!!!

[gubba]

Hope your mom is better and I will pray for her. You are a wonderful daughter and don't ever doubt that. Even if you never do another thing, you have done a wonderful deed by taking her and going to the hospital to visit. I'm not certain I would do that...I hate Hospitals.

[bexcelica]

good luck, and shes lucky to have a daughter like you

[2jo2]

OMG, you're feeling guilty, but you went over there!!! You took her to the hospital! You ATE there!!! You did terrific! Last Christmas my family had been sick around the holidays and I cancelled travelling home so that I wouldn't have to be near them. I screwed up everyone's plans(we have a smallish family), probably disappointed everyone, made myself look like a head caseand felt horrible, but you went!You did great!!

[mommyof3]

I agree with everyone! You are awesome!!


How is your mom? My mil has suffered with pancreatitis--2 bouts--and so did my stepdad. It can be very serious and EXTREMELY painful. Please update us on how she is.

[jamie24]

thanks again u guys...i feel so much better!! my mom is still in
serious agony, she will need to stay in the hospital a few more days at
least. i hate to see her in such pain. even though i get really panicky
in hospitals, it is weird, because i hardly even noticed tonight when i
went to drop her off some clean clothes and toothpaste etc.. i just
wanted to make sure SHE was okay and not worry about my stupid self
anymore, i am sick of that!!!maybe it's a step towards being cured??
thank you for all the replies everyone...

you are all awesome.[img]smileys/smilies_04.gif[/img][img]smileys/smilies_04.gif[/img][img]smileys/smilies_04.gif[/img][img]smileys/smilies_04.gif[/img][img]smileys/smilies_04.gif[/img][img]smileys/smilies_04.gif[/img]

[ontariogirl]

You did so well. You went over there, like 2jo2 stated she didnt go to relatives for Christmas because they were sick, you went over not knowing what was up. I remember when I told my parents that the reason why I am like this is because of a phobia. I go over there one day and my mom wasn't at work, she was home sick. Now my mother would have to be really ill to not be at work. She came around the corner and she looked awful, she said I am so sorry I have the stomach flu. She was so upset that I was there while she was sick. I felt so bad that she felt bad that she was sick and I was there. She was lying down in her bed and didn't bring the pail, she is yelling for the pail and I run grab it for her. I went to the store bought stuff to make spaghetti, made it there and left.
My mother is like yours, when myself my brother or sister and grand kids are sick she is there if you want her no questions asked and she doesnt worry if she gets it. You should be so proud of yourself. I am proud of you.

[angel13]

Well done Jamie, I agree with everything that everyone here has said! You're a star!


Its always tough when parents get ill, I really understand how you feel - its awful, being afraid of them. But in the end, your love for your mum showed through, and you dealt with your fear in order to help her. I think you are absolutely right, it is most definitely a step to beatingemet once and for all. I hate hospitals too, get really panicky, just like you - but when someone you really love is in there,. you just seem to forget your fear.


I take off my hat to you, you did a really lovely thing, taking care of everyone - they won't forget it in a hurry, either [img]smileys/smilies_02.gif[/img]

[jamie24]

good for you ontariogirl..that must have been hard!!! thank you for all
the replies, this site is so supportive. angel i really hope it
is a step towards getting better. right now i can't think of myself, i
just want my mom to be okay, you know? panicing about v* just seems so
silly when someone u love is really hurting...maybe just me, but i
think this life sometimes puts things into perspective for you if you
can't do it yourself...

[img]smileys/smilies_05.gif[/img][img]smileys/smilies_05.gif[/img][img]smileys/smilies_01.gif[/img][img]smileys/smilies_02.gif[/img]

[gubba]

jamie, you said it...it is funny how silly V* is when there is a real crisis in life. V*ing is such a small thing that will end and go away in a short time and only happen once in ablue moon...When a parent is sick and it's really serious, you realize how much they mean to us and how insignificant V* is.


I hope this may be exactly what you need to get on the road to recovery from this dreaded phobia. I hate why you had to go through this, but maybe this is the exposure type therapy first hand.


good luck and keep us posted on how your mom is...