He finally gets it!!!!

[pretty polly]

I would just like to say that finding this site, and chatting to all you
guys, is turning out to be a real blessing! Last week I posted, asking
how do you make a non-emet understand, mainly because my
husband just didn't seem to understand (or particularly want to
understand) what we go through in our daily lives.
Anyway, I finally convinced him to read some of your posts, and
actually got him to read Sages paper, and he now genuinely
understands and is actually quite sympathetic!! Although he may still
make light of it at times, and perhaps will never quite realize the
extent of our fears, I am proud to say that for the first time in our
marriage, he has accepted that I am not "just a hyperchondriac" and
this phobia is a very powerful and serious infliction to me.
We had a really good heart to heart last night and I feel like we got
so much out in the open - I just wanted to let all of you know, that if
nothing else, this site is a fabulous counsellor, and now going to
become an important part of my life!!
Bravo everybody - keep up the good work....

[samara's on tv]

I'm glad that your husband finally understands what you are going through. It's hard to explain to people. My parents have known that I have had Emetophobia for YEARS and they still don't get the whole thing. I sent them information on it and they were like, "Why are you blaming me for this?" it's good that your husband finally sees what's going on and now you can get along better because of it.


~Monica

[tayda]

Yaay!! That's wonderful to hear; you must feel so much better!

[*mandi*]

Yay! Im glad your husband understands now! Its so hard to get people to understand. Im still trying to convince EVERYONE that this is a major problem for me.


Everytime I try to explain this phobia to people...I get the same response..."no one likes to be sick" Ugh I really hate hearing that.

[kateri27]

Thanks, I am so scared to explain it to my Husband. I hope that If he reads some posts, he will understand. I have just been so embarassed for so long and I don't know what to do. hopefully this will give me strength and I can tell him.

[2jo2]

It's like a total relief when it gets out in the open. When I finally told my husband about it, there were so many of the things that I did that finally made sense to him. My mom understood when she witnessed me having a complete meltdown. When you finally have people on your side, it's like you can relax just a tiny bit, like you have some protection or something. I would urge anyone who's hiding it to let your loved ones know what you're feeling. It's difficult to do, but when you open up, it helps alot.

[bratinella]

Thank God for this site.. and thank God for people like you who understand what I'm going through..


How did you even try to make people understand how it is? Personally I'm sick of the panic attacks, uncontrollable crying, and sometimes even fainting when I come across anything that even comes close to.. THAT. I am having such a hard time and nobody understood how it felt.


Very recently my boyfriend and I fought because of one particularly bad panic attack. We were on a bus and this kid that sat close to us was on the verge of throwing u*. I wanted to get off the bus at that instant because I was so terrified. My boyfriend just thought that I was making a big fuss out of it. I seriously thought about leaving him.


Is something very wrong with me? I can't even stand being in the same room with someone who's nauseated.. Some people are even thinking that I'm insensitive but I just couldn't bring myself to help.. the feeling is so paralyzing..


Please help me.

[liriodendron]

Being a nut case runs in my family so they're generally pretty understanding.



My parents sometimes ask for styrofoam cups when they go to
restaurants. Even when they get wine. They also make the server wipe
out the glasses when disposable cups aren't available. Kinda funny
because I give THEM a really hard time about that. IF anyone is not
understanding, it's me. I just don't get why they want someone to wipe
out a clean glass with their dirty hands with a dirty dish rag.



Anyway, with all the recent publicity of OCD with the various TV shows
with an OCD character, people are quick to say "Oh, so you have OCD!"
And I try to make it very clear that it's not OCD. My parents are quick
to make fun of each other and me for having OCD, but it's all in good
humor I think. It's great when you can laugh about it really and when
you get involved with someone and turn them into a worry wart too even
if they aren't an emet by nature.


Edited by: liriodendron

[bratinella]

Good for you liriodendron that you're family is generally understanding. Here where I come from this phobia is virtually unheard of. They think I'm just... flaky.

[scarletbea]

Bratinella -

There is nothing "wrong" with you...why would anyone want to risk
getting a sickness if they could avoid it? It's everyone else who has it
wrong! I would do the same as you... most of the time, people who are ill
have something contagious. It is usually pretty obvious when there is
something more serious wrong, and then you can get more expert help
for them.

[crystalmom]

Pretty Polly - Yay for you and your husband! That is wonderful. It truely is hard to get someone to realize how traumatizing this is, but at least now, he may GET it!!!


Bratinella - You are not crazy. Cause if you were, you wouldn't know it, and you wouldn't care. It is hard dealing with non-emets, and you wish that for one minute they could feel your dread and sense of utter terror. Try as Polly did, and ask your b/f to read some posts and the thread under 'treatments' that Sage has made up. Might help!


Crystal

[bratinella]

Scarletbea & Crystal..


Thank you so much for the support guys.. I actually brought it up with him, and I tried to explain really well that any of this isn't my choice. It's so good to know that there are people who are going through the same thing. I actually feel better about myself. One thing really struck me though.. this passage from http://faq.emetophobia.net/emetophobia.htmlsays it all:


"Emetophobics are usually incapacitated when it comes to taking care of sick family members. Some feel guilty that they are unable to be supportive of their children. Some fear their child is confused because the parent seems to be more worried about his or her potential illness than about the child's actual illness."


I don't want to seem insensitive or uncaring. I just don't know how to make people understand.. do you get what I'm saying?