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  1. #1
    Join Date
    Jul 2014
    Location
    Dorset, England
    Posts
    3

    Default Boyfriend v* & d* helpppppppp!

    So I've been suffering for a good few years with emet and go through periods of being in control and period of absolute terror! Tonight sadly is the latter

    Me and the boyfriend moved in together for the first time about 18 months ago and tonight the first dreaded sv has occurred! Boyfriend was feeling fine when he got home, said he wasn't hungry and was tired but that's not too unusual for him. He had a nap whilst I cooked dinner - again not unusual. I woke him up when it was ready and he said he didn't want any - strange as I'd cooked his favourite. Within minutes he went and shut himself in the bathroom with d*. In there for over 30 mins he reluctantly admitted to me that he had also v*d. He's now spent about 3 hrs holed up in bathroom being ill - even made a makeshift bed out of old towels and his dressing gown for the night.

    Thankfully we we have a spare room and spare bathroom so I have a sanctuary. I have had strict instructions by him to leave him well alone (I feel so bad though!!) I'm dreading the night if it carries on as the sound kills me and I feel so bad abandoning him. Once he's feeling better in this morning (min 12hrs symptom free) I'm planning on boil washing ALL soft furnishings I couldn't remove prior to event and washing EVERY surface with a strong bleach mixture. Will be also washing everything else on shelves etc with said mixture and disposing of toothbrushes. This is 1st time I've ever had to handle this myself (mum also a clean freak was SO good at this - sv's never spread to others at her house) planning on leaving him in bed all day tomorrow then boiling sheets 24hrs after symptom free. Do you see if there is anything I've missed or any other tips you can give me??? I'm sorry this is so long - I'm probably going to have less sleep than the boyfriend tonight and with a stressful and busy day due at work tomorrow I am feeling pretty close to the edge right now!!! Even rang my poor mum in tears but I'm determined to get a handle on this once and for all.

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Sep 2011
    Location
    wyoming
    Posts
    1,690

    Default Re: Boyfriend v* & d* helpppppppp!

    Well I am proud of you, you don't seem to be freaking out as much, and have a really good plan. Im sorry this is happening to you, I would be a mess, but you are safe away from him, in your own bed, and own bathroom. Just mind your hygiene and hope for the best!
    If you try and tell me a phobia is unreal. I dare you to live a day, and feel what I have to feel.


    - michelle




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    for stories, poems, and all sorts of stuff related to my emetophobia.

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Jan 2011
    Posts
    5,719

    Default Re: Boyfriend v* & d* helpppppppp!

    I think you should write a checklist for US because you honestly covered everything. Even the toothbrushes, which I always remind people of. I guess the only other thing would be all the doorknobs and remotes. But I an sure that it is on your mental list.

    I hope he feels better soon! Thank god your mom taught you well.

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Jan 2014
    Location
    Washington
    Posts
    1,347

    Default Re: Boyfriend v* & d* helpppppppp!

    Nope! You got it all, I sometimes wear gloves so the bleach doesn't get on my hands (extra protection) but your doing great and I'm sure you'll be fine. Don't feel bad about leaving him alone, I leave my bf be but have him text me if he needs something, I don't let him go in the kitchen for 3 days after symptoms.

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Jul 2014
    Location
    Dorset, England
    Posts
    3

    Default Re: Boyfriend v* & d* helpppppppp!

    Thank you. He's sound asleep - for now - on the bathroom floor. Hoping that is the end of it but don't want to count my chickens as it were!
    Having a plan of action is the only way I can feel in control and going over this list distracts my focus from my every little sensation. It doesn't help that (sorry if tmi!!) it's my 'time of the month' so I'll find it hard to distinguish between what is 'normal' tummy ache and what isn't if I am unlucky and succumb. So that is stressing me out - the element of control is a big part of my issues I think.
    Just getting this off my chest has made me feel better. I am so thankful to have people who TRULY understand - not just when it suits!

  6. #6
    Join Date
    Oct 2013
    Posts
    1,326

    Default Re: Boyfriend v* & d* helpppppppp!

    Oh no I'm so sorry!!! Your doing great though! Proud of you!! PRayers!

  7. #7
    Join Date
    Mar 2013
    Location
    Suffolk, England
    Posts
    1,417

    Default Re: Boyfriend v* & d* helpppppppp!

    You sound so calm and handling this very well! If that was me I would be a mess
    you can't start the next chapter of your life if you keep re reading the last one
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  8. #8
    Join Date
    Jan 2014
    Location
    Washington
    Posts
    1,347

    Default Re: Boyfriend v* & d* helpppppppp!

    How's it going? Is he better? Are you doing ok?

  9. #9
    Join Date
    Jul 2014
    Location
    Dorset, England
    Posts
    3

    Default Re: Boyfriend v* & d* helpppppppp!

    Hi - wow I've got to say I utterly surprised myself and coped much better than I ever could've known!
    After about 4-5 hrs of being ill he got to bed and slept undisturbed until morning and that seemed to be the end of it!
    I relegated myself to spare room and had a bath next morning in other bathroom. But I felt so mean ignoring him that I managed to go into our bedroom and give him a cuddle, get drinks for him etc without breaking down. I worked from home as usual and once finished, nearly 24hrs after he started being ill I stared 'operation clean up'. I could've asked him to do it but I knew deep down I wouldn't be truly satisfied it was up to my strict standards. Now maybe I went overboard and bleached every item on the shelves as well as EVERY surface including walls, doors and in the shower (wearing gloves). I was physically shaking as I tackled the toilet but once I had done it I felt so relieved and that I could use the room at last. I washed all soft items including towels, dressing gowns etc that were in the room and feel more at ease.
    Now, about 48hrs after it all started I'm back to normal contact with him and I've got to say how proud I feel of myself for dealing with it and not running back to my mums. Sorry this is so long but never in a million years when I was at my worst did I ever think I would be able to cope as I did. There is hope guys, believe me! I appreciate your support immensely and I am happy to chat with any of you guys to return the favour! X

  10. #10
    Join Date
    Jan 2014
    Location
    Washington
    Posts
    1,347

    Default Re: Boyfriend v* & d* helpppppppp!

    You did amazing! I'm impressed you cuddled with him right after he was sick! I waited 3 days before having contact with my bf, I brought him food and drinks though and after 24 hours of not being ill I let him come into the living room and watch TV with me. I refused to go in our room until everything was washed and I could open the windows for a bit. You should be so proud of yourself and you'll see that you won't catch it.

  11. #11
    Join Date
    Jan 2011
    Posts
    5,719

    Default Re: Boyfriend v* & d* helpppppppp!

    wow you did an amazing job! even for a normal (non emet) person, you did amazingly well. I am crazy crazy proud of you I am happy he is feeling better.

  12. #12
    Join Date
    Oct 2013
    Posts
    1,326

    Default Re: Boyfriend v* & d* helpppppppp!

    Good job!!

 

 

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