Emetophobia + driving anxiety.

[sunnyskies]

Hello to all! I haven't been here for a very long time, which spoke of my progress at at least deflating the severity of emet.

But I'm back, sadly because it has found a new way to trap and torment me. *sigh*

Hoping for some general opinions and suggestions about this. I have just been struggling a LOT with anxiety/panic while I drive and this is only due to emet. I have a lousy minimal 10-15 minute commute to work and it's a miracle I get there every day with how much I panic on the way. I think it starts a genuine but slight level of motion sickness when I'm fatigued or stressed, and then my being so hyperaware of it sends it sky high into feeling sick to my stomach.

It's especially awful when I'm stopped at red traffic lights or stop signs that you get stuck at while waiting to make a quick turn left or to get across a busy four lane road. I start to feel really claustrophobic and nauseated, and with my worst anxiety comes what I perceive to be the feeling of being about to v*. It's this super clammy, queasy feeling all throughout my body. Sometimes my heart pounds and I can hear it, and basically just all I want to do is stop or park the car and get out of it to just walk everywhere instead of driving, all because of yes, this fear I feel like I could get sick.

Bearing in mind that, I have not v* in at least ten years. And seeing as this has gone on awhile and I certainly don't end up getting sick, it's become more obvious to me this is psychosomatic or just a total panic response. It also plays to my social anxieties too because if I start to wig out I'm afraid people will notice and be weirded out or made nervous themselves. It's so stupid, especially the red light problem which is probably the most severe. I remember too once upon a time that I didn't often mind a yellow or red light approaching. It seemed safer to be stopped at a light than careening down a highway at 60 MPH or whatever the case would be. Now I never like to be stopped where I feel trapped. When I get to my destination, the sick feeling is gone. I always feel tired and defeated, though, fighting some ridiculous war with myself to even make it there is exhausting.

The last thing that comes with this is that as a panic response in the past when I've had attacks, I would lightly pull my hair or pinch my arms/wrists as a distraction. Now I find myself ripping hair out (rarely) and pinching my arm so hard (this one is almost daily if I drive) that I have a really horrible cluster of bruises that clearly look like fingerprints and from some unusual occurrence. It looks awful and I have to hide it from everyone to avoid questions.

I can't really afford therapy, and I have tried antidepressants and anti anxiety meds but the side effects were too much. I feel like any day I could snap out of it and just overcome it as I have before. But it's taking some real time to ride it out this time and I don't feel like I can talk to any of my family of friends about it. I know what they will say and that they are probably right, for people without this phobia. Or that they will think I'm crazy, which I feel that way all of the time and feel bad enough about it as it is.

Thanks in advance, to anyone for listening or commenting.

[MaybeBaby]

I absolutely have driving anxiety. It stems from an especially bad bout of morning sickness. Arrived at my destination and proceeded to v all over the parking lot. So now if I am at all anxious I get flashbacks and convince myself that's gonna happen again... even though it's been almost exactly 10 years. In fact I had a bad panic attack in the car today on the way to pick my daughter up from school. My boyfriend was taking a nap and I started to feel a little nauseated and went into a full blown panic attack. Normally I would have just had my boyfriend drive her, but he needed the rest for work this evening. I figured I'd calm down when I got into the car and put on some music... that wasn't the case. When sitting at red lights I seriously thought "this is it, it's gonna happen right now". I made it through thankfully... but any kind of anxiety in the car brings back that memory.

[rrosedawsonn]

I'm sorry I don't have advice as I'm new to the roads, but there was one time when I got in feeling ill and five minutes away from my destination i had the thought 'okay I'm either going to have to put on my hazard lights and stop or pull over because it is going to happen now' thankfully I was a little distracted from making sure I was safe because I was freaking out/speeding. I see the red light as a short opportunity not that anyone wants to v but at least at a red light you can get it over with, driving with the windows down doesn't help? I'm sorry to hear about your morning sickness also, that's scary and I really hope I can overcome my phobia by the time I want a child

[klm142]

Yeah since I passed my test a year ago this is my biggest emet related fear I reckon. I've had to pull over a couple of times and have thought I was going to have to leave my car and get a lift home a few times too. I've always been fine though but it terrifies me. I think it stems from being sick in the car on the way back from the docs a few years ago and I'm a nervous driver anyways so combining the two is bad news! I had to pull over on the way home the other night... not one of my finer moments! My poor sister must have been freaked the hell out as we ended up stopped outside the dodgiest pub in town at midnight on a weekend coming back from a gig! Lucky we didn't get mugged or carjacked!

[sunnyskies]

Thanks everyone. I figured I couldn't be alone on this.

I'm trying to just focus on deep breathing when both driving or when stopped at lights or signs. It kinda helps (well, a lot, when in comparison to when I'm mildly or seriously hyperventilating) but once thinking about being sick consumes the mind, it's very difficult to stop it and focus on something else. It's hard enough to stop it when you're just sitting around not feeling well or whatever, but when you're driving and have your life and others lives at stake, it's about 100x worse.

I tried really hard to fight it today but ended up kinda spazzing at a red light, taking some wacky detour right and made my drive to work much longer and made me late. Sigh.

klm142, haha, so many times the nearest place for me to pull into if I needed to take a break is some seedy bar also. Usually that's enough to keep me driving, lololol.

[20megatonbomb]

i had anxieties like this a few years ago, but in high school i had to drive for a total of an hour every day, so i managed to get over it with the help of a friend that would ride with me in the mornings. i think that listening to familiar music while you're driving also helps, but listening to music is a coping device i use for pretty much all of my psych problems anyway. it helps me when my anxiety flares up on long drives, though. it gives you something to fill your senses with when you're waiting at a light, too. having a drink with you, like water or ginger ale, and sipping at it when you start to feel bad can help. i hope you can start feeling better about driving!! taking an otc anti-emetic before starting your drive might give you some extra peace of mind.

just out of curiosity, do you have feelings of claustrophobia any time other than when you're driving?

[sunnyskies]

i had anxieties like this a few years ago, but in high school i had to drive for a total of an hour every day, so i managed to get over it with the help of a friend that would ride with me in the mornings. i think that listening to familiar music while you're driving also helps, but listening to music is a coping device i use for pretty much all of my psych problems anyway. it helps me when my anxiety flares up on long drives, though. it gives you something to fill your senses with when you're waiting at a light, too. having a drink with you, like water or ginger ale, and sipping at it when you start to feel bad can help. i hope you can start feeling better about driving!! taking an otc anti-emetic before starting your drive might give you some extra peace of mind.

just out of curiosity, do you have feelings of claustrophobia any time other than when you're driving?

Thanks for the tips!

As of late, it's basically just when I'm in a car. Whether I'm driving, or it can be really bad when I have to ride in the back seat if someone else drives. I feel really stuck and nauseous sometimes. Sometimes too, and this is a bad combo of claustrophobia, emetophobia and my social anxiety but sometimes when I have to talk to someone one-on-one (like in a meeting, or some kind of tense discussion, something a little more high pressure) I start to wig out and feel trapped. Not when I'm just having a regular conversation or anything (thankfully) but if it's kind of important and I can't excuse myself really, I feel very stuck. My chest gets tight and then my stomach starts to turn. My breathing isn't really right. Sometimes I feel light-headed. Typical symptoms of nervousness.

And inevitably, I never remember anything I was told cause I'm basically having a panic attack this entire time. I don't even feel better when it's over. I feel so tense, ill and agitated. I just hate being confined in these ways.

[mmilden]

it helps me to listen to a podcast/talk/recorded sermon that will occupy my mind. the distraction often makes me feel a lot better. I also carry a little plastic bag in my purse/car in case I do v*. I have never had to use it, but knowing it is there helps me feel a little more calm. However, I do have OCD so a lot of "ritualized" things help to calm me down.

[klm142]

If I'm by myself in the car I also turn the music up super loud and sing along (I must look crazy!!) A psychologist I know says that singing at the top of your lungs is a great relaxation/ breathing exercise and its distracting!

[ah792]

Oh dear lord, this is the story of my life. I am always having to drive 3 hours to visit my boyfriend and the drives to and from are horrible. I always panic that Im gonna end up getting sick during my drive and not being able to get to my destination. My hands get all sweaty and I get nauseous and i feel all gaggy, basically its horrible and I start like screaming and going insane. Im sure the people driving alone next to me get a real kick out of it haha. Weird thing is, I never used to be like this. Ive always had emetophobia since I can remember, but the driving thing is fairly recent. Anyways, you are not alone!! If you need to talk Im always here!

[kencan98]

I used to have the same thing. I won't go into detail because I don't want to "give" you any of my symptoms but for me it was more about being stuck. If I was driving on an open road I was good to go. If I hit a bit of traffic the panic was on. It seems like you're going through the same issue. I got through it very easily. I went to a doctor and got prescribed Klonopin. It's been 4 years now and haven't had the problem since about 3 doses in. I never went up in dosage, have no side effects at all, and I only take it in the morning.

I know you said you tried AD's. I did too and had the same issue. Side effects and they made my panic worse. Klonopin is a controlled substance and some doctors might be shy about giving it to you but if you can find a doctor who will it's well worth it. I never found it addicting and like I said I've never gone up in dosage and I still feel great. It basically gave me my life back. Obviously everyone is different in the way medicine effects them so I have no idea if it will work for you like it works for me but I can say with 100% certainty that you won't have any side effects beyond being a little tired in the beginning. I've never heard of anyone getting sick from it, gaining weight or any of the other negative stuff associated with AD's. It also has a long half life so if you forget to take it it's really not a big deal.

Good luck and I hope you can find the help to help you fix the issue.

Happy Thanksgiving.

[NaiveAndTrue]

I feel BETTER in my car during an attack. I too keep a bag that I've never needed. The vibration of the car helps my stomach settle. If it's really bad I'll ride in the right hand lane in case I need to "pull over", but I never have. I prefer, if it HAS to happen, that no one hear or see me. So being in my car makes me feel more secure.
Are you in the US? You can pick up Bonnine at any drug store (Prescription it's called Anti-vert, but I like the Bonnine because it's chewable, and I get it 6 boxes at a time on Amazon. lol). Don't go driving with it right away. It is less-drowsy, but it can still make you a bit sleepy. I've found that faded with me. It went from knocking me out, to I'd be okay and just sleep really well, to not affecting me at all. It's sold for motion sickness, but it's indicated for dizziness and it's an antiemetic.

[derp]

I have sort of the opposite problem. I'm fine driving in the city with red lights, but once I'm on the highway I get really nervous. Car sickness has never been a real issue for me, but for some reason driving on the highway really freaks me out. I'm not sure if it's emet related or just panic. I've had several bad panic attacks while driving on the highway and maybe I'm just afraid of it happening again. I have a bigger feeling of being trapped while on the highway because it's just open road and my mind wanders and sometimes there's not a good place to pull over if anything were to happen. I'm still working on this. I end up scratching my arms with my nails to distract myself, or putting my hand on the back of my neck because my hands are always cold and the cold helps.

[KTodd]

I can totally sympathize here. I get bad emet. anxiety in the car as well. To the point I keep a grocery bad in my purse just incase and I keep telling my sons, " Now remember, if I start getting sick take the wheel and make sure we don't wreck." Once I get back home, I'm ok. I'm not even ok when I get out of the car, I have to literally be home to be ok. So don't ever feel alone, or crazy. There are a lot of us like you. Sending love and prayers.

[sophie94]

oh wow im not the only one! this happens to me all the time too in the car- its usually when i'm on a motorway or a place where there is no place to stop so i feel like i cant get out or stop my car. ive never really suffered with travel issues either i think its more the feeling of not being able to stop- i start to visualise what might happen and its awful- it makes my driving pretty erratic and dangerous which isnt good- i've found listening to audio books to be quite helpful and also listening to 1940s music and imagining i am driving an old fashioned car in that time- sounds a bit bizarre but it stops my mind from wandering without actually wandering to a place that causes unsafe driving (something i am very guilty of)

[djg]

I don't have a problem, as long as I can get away, but being stuck I sure do. I rode in the back seat of a two door sports car from ohio to north carolina and that was total hell. I can't ride with anyone anymore so im not sure I can sympathize there. Have to be driving. As I've almost lept from moving vehicle during a panic moment.

[Calibabe321]

Oh my god!! YES some one who understands. It's crazy because I've had this my whole life and it wasn't till a few months ago that I HATE driving... When I'm on the freeway I will literally drive 40-45 mph in the far right hand lane. Cars will be annoyed and pass me but I don't even care. I'm freaking out and so nauseous the whole time and feels like someone is choking me. My anxiety is horrible. Sometimes I'll even start crying, ugh it's so bad. Sometimes I'll call someone to get my mind off of it but even sometimes that makes it worse Bc im not even listening to what they're saying, I'm only thinking about how bad I feel and how I'll never reach my destination fast enough. If you ever need to talk know that you are definitley not alone!! Message me anytime

[sunnyskies]

Oh my god!! YES some one who understands. It's crazy because I've had this my whole life and it wasn't till a few months ago that I HATE driving... When I'm on the freeway I will literally drive 40-45 mph in the far right hand lane. Cars will be annoyed and pass me but I don't even care. I'm freaking out and so nauseous the whole time and feels like someone is choking me. My anxiety is horrible. Sometimes I'll even start crying, ugh it's so bad. Sometimes I'll call someone to get my mind off of it but even sometimes that makes it worse Bc im not even listening to what they're saying, I'm only thinking about how bad I feel and how I'll never reach my destination fast enough. If you ever need to talk know that you are definitley not alone!! Message me anytime

I hear you! I start crying sometimes too. At times that has made me feel better for some reason but not always. I've tried calling people too and I think it makes it worse too. I feel a little less alone but it's just another distraction. I haven't driven much in the month or so, been happy to have gotten a lot of rides and time off so I haven't had to but my luck is coming to an end soon. I just want to focus on what's ahead of me and not think about how I feel physically. That shouldn't be as difficult as it feels it is sometimes. At least you take it slow. I need to slow down overall, I pretty much race to my destination and it doesn't help my anxiety at all. I also made a bad habit last year of taking an alternate route with one lane going each way instead of the faster, multi lane roads and while it overwhelms me less, eventually I have to make this tricky merge to the left on a busy street that is seriously nerve-wracking. Another person I talked to randomly brought up one day how scary it is to merge there and I that made me even more nervous that someone that isn't panicking even hates having to change lanes there, it validated how I should probably take the other way instead that but I'm very nervous about that too. It really is faster to my destination, and there are less stoplights and without having to merge so probably safer I don't know why it freaks me out so much. Just the chance of people tailing me and zooming around me never helps.

I am going to try to overcome this in 2015, that's one of my resolutions! We'll see how it goes.

[jsquared]

I freak out if I can't be the one driving and I prefer driving alone. I feel more 'in control' when I drive. When I'm having a panic attack and get afraid I'm going to v, I really don't know what to do. I've never gotten sick in a bag before or on the side of the road--I've never v anywhere but a bathroom and that scares me so much! I just can't imagine not being in a bathroom by myself!

I love the above tip about singing loudly to relax! It made me smile and I will try that one next time.

[sunnyskies]

I freak out if I can't be the one driving and I prefer driving alone. I feel more 'in control' when I drive. When I'm having a panic attack and get afraid I'm going to v, I really don't know what to do. I've never gotten sick in a bag before or on the side of the road--I've never v anywhere but a bathroom and that scares me so much! I just can't imagine not being in a bathroom by myself!

I love the above tip about singing loudly to relax! It made me smile and I will try that one next time.

I encountered that some this past month when getting rides, haha. Suddenly miss panics while driving here (me) was holding on to the arm rest for dear life and internally criticizing other people's driving. Not once did I not see the humor in that and the strong sense I should stop critiquing their driving habits.

In some sense I missed being in the drivers seat, but when the traffic was heavy and the red lights were neverending, I didn't mind not having to be behind the wheel. I'm too persnickety I guess. can't pick and choose the times I am terrified of driving and when I'm ok with it. I wish I could make peace with it, haha.