Emetophobia and school, my parents don't understand?

[chlochris]

All of last year I missed about 2 months of school because I didn't feel well or felt n*. This year, I need 90% attendance to graduate, but the problem is I do frequently feel n*. Every time I tell my parents that I'm not feeling well enough to go to school, my father simply tells me to "tough it out" or that "it will be fine". Tuesdays are the worst days to feel sick because we have Mass on Tuesday morning and people do frequently get sick when in Mass, and if I feel n* in Mass, I can never reach the teacher to tell her I wish to leave. To protect myself if I do happen to v*, I sit on the end of the row next to the window away from where everyone can see me. Last year I asked my parents if I could just skip Mass in the mornings on Tuesday and go back after it to go to my next class, but they quickly told me "no" and to "get over it". It's very difficult to deal with because they do not have the same fear and get agitated with me when I do not want to go out to certain places or eat certain foods. For the past 3 years, all I have eating for lunch are tacos that my mother makes every Sunday night. I am not kidding. I only eat about 35 different foods which means I don't generally eat what my mother makes for dinner which created a very tense atmosphere as she thinks I do not appreciate her cooking or respect her as a mother. Because I have OCD (More based upon complying to rituals) I refuse to go to school when one of my rituals was not done properly in fear that a consequence of not following my ritual will be getting sick at school. Last night, one of the 5 rituals I complete before I go to sleep did not go through properly, so I did not go to school today in fear of being sick, and I did feel sick today, which proves it. All of my close friends know about this fear but sadly some of them forget and will pretend to v* when I am around and it makes me want to cry that they could be so inconsiderate to my fears. A friend of mine at lunch always makes crazy concoctions like mixing mayonnaise with water or mustard and milk to try and make himself v*, and I always wrestle the liquids away from him and throw them out, and once had a teacher tell him off for trying to drink it and he did get in trouble.
I know I need a certain amount of days to graduate but my parents act like I don't understand that, but to me, not graduating is a lot less worse than not getting sick at school, I would rather have to repeat Year 10 five times before even getting sick in the school restroom and I am not exaggerating in the least.
Last year there was a girl in my class who was acting sick, and she said she felt n*, so I quickly stood up and ran to the back of the class, literally screaming at my teacher to make her leave the classroom, I was shaking with fear. On her way to the office she had v*d in the hall and even though I didn't see it happen, I had a panic attack and could not stop crying. And when she came back into class to get her backs to go home I started crying again.
I am so terrified of school because of what can happen there and I have begged my parents to home school me but they refuse. It is becoming extremely difficult to cope and sometimes I just want to end my life. I am only 13, and I have so many more years to live, having to deal with this fear that I know is ridiculous but I just can't shake it. I have no idea what to tell my parents anymore of what to do about it and I am so terrified of school and public places that I haven't eaten in a restaurant in 2 years. What should I do? I have no idea what to do anymore, because as the only options for treatment seem to be facing my fears, but I would rather live a life where I try with all my being to avoid encountering my fears than to face my fears and possibly have them be less intense.

[Syrup]

I know it's hard. I DO! I've been there. Your parents really are doing what's best for you. Avoiding school, mass, your classes, etc. would only HURT you, not help. Avoidance behaviors feed the phobia and make it SO MUCH more difficult to then act normal at all. Have you talked to your parents about therapy? I really thinking getting some help would be appropriate for you.

I know it doesn't feel like it now, but someday looking back you'll see that v*ing IS NOT WORSE than missing school graduation. It's not. Never has been, never will be. If you were sick at school it would suck. No doubt about it. But it would be done and over and you'd feel better. If you didn't graduate the REST OF YOUR LIFE would be affected.

As far as your rituals go, I used to do that to. Your BRAIN is telling you that if you don't do them you'll get ill but your brain is lying. You're NOT ill today. External rituals CAN NOT AND DO NO affect your physical health. You can do small things to let those go. And you need to let them go. Try to start doing 4 instead of 5. Go to school and see that nothing happens. Yes it's scary, yes you'll be anxious but nothing bad will happen to you.

Please talk to your parents about therapy. You're young and could deal with this in a relatively short amount of time. There's life to be lived!!! You should be out with our friends, going to the movies, football games, etc. not sitting at home worrying about a silly thing like v*. V*ing is NOTHING. NOTHING! It take a matter of SECONDS, only happens a number of times in a LIFETIME and yet we live our lives worrying about it. Nip it in the bud.