Proud but obsessing

[vgirl]

Not a regular on here - I just seem to pop in when I'm panicking about stuff, or just plain old stuck obsessing and can't get out. :-)
So I'll start with why I'm proud. *** WARNING: It's graphic.

A week ago, I had to go to a meeting for work in a different building. On my way there I had to pass through the back corridor of a shopping mall. On my way back out into the mall, through the back corridors, just before the double doors that led back into the mall, I saw a woman standing very still. I didn't think much of it, figured she was using her phone in the quiet of the corridor or something. Then I saw something dark on the floor.

Okay, you all know where I am going with this because I'm here, but seriously, I didn't clue in until I was almost right on top of it. She had v*d everywhere! She was standing in this huge puddle that took up the whole corridor. Like spray in every direction.

I was getting closer, obsessing, thinking about what was going on, starting to panic, but then I asked myself, "what would a normal person do in this situation?"
Well, offer help, I suppose. (Just guessing here.)
So I did, sort of. I said, "are you okay? Do you need help?" I was trying SO hard to just act normal, casual, like people do that all the time.
She kind of shook her head, like all helpless, like a puppy, and then wiped at her mouth and to be honest, I fled.
I stepped gingerly around the puddles as best I could. Praying that my shoelaces were well tied so they wouldn't drag through that monster puddle (they were), and headed out into the mall.

So I was proud that I had done something a little normal, even if she didn't want or need help. And maybe she just thought, "what is this person doing asking if I'm okay when I am clearly not okay."
But now I can't stop thinking about it. The look on her face, probably of not knowing if or when it would start up again and maybe just wishing she was home alone in a private bathroom. I thought I might catch it but didn't. I waited a week and I'm pretty sure.

And no, I didn't incinerate my shoes. I just avoided touching the bottoms for... well, I still won't touch any part except the very top and the laces. Needed to share. Could not not not tell this to my husband because he'd be like, "so what?" People see stuff like this all the time and just get on with their lives... some very lucky people. Others of us can obsess for YEARS. :-o

[ThatGuyWhoLikesSandow]

I wouldn't have even been able to go near her, let alone engage in conversation!! You are REALLY brave doing that. As long as you didn't touch any of it you'll be fine.

[SilentFrog]

I love reading stories like this because it inspires me to just fight on, especially when I'm feeling super down about my emet. I agree, that you are truly one incredible person to have had the courage and the bravery not just to step over it but to actually ask her for help! I mean, I just can't even imagine how I would have reacted in that situation! In fact I'll be honest, I've had nightmares about this very kind of situation, having to step over it, I would have been obsessing about it for, well, I don't even know if I'd have been able to wear those shoes again, so yeah, in short I just wanted to say that I think you have done something really amazing here, and wanted to say thank you for inspiring some much needed hope in me. I'm glad that you're feeling proud of yourself, because you deserve every last bit of that feeling!