Panic attack

[Dxxr]

Sitting in a waiting room waiting on my 2nd cbt appoinment I'm half an hour early and having awful panic attack it's been coming on and off for past 2 hours so disappointed with myself as if being doing a lot better past few days now this today is putting me right back to square one. I Know myself it's a panic/anxiety attack but I still have that seed of doubt that won't go away making me think but what if it's not a panic attack and I actually have a bug as it's making feel really not well

[SilentFrog]

Oh Dxxr, I'm so sorry to hear about this and equally sorry that I've got to it too late to be able to be of any real support

First things first, you shouldn't be disappointed about having a panic attack, even the best of us still have our bad days. You're only on your second cbt appointment, in time I'm sure you'll start to feel better, having less and less bad days, but look at it this way. You said yourself that you've been doing a lot better these past few days, now that is an awesome achievement, because that proves that you CAN do it! You're capable of getting better and you're on the right track

I know it feels like you've slipped right back to square one, I've been there myself, feeling crushed and disappointed. But you know something else, you're talking to a therapist about your emet and that is already doing better than I am. I can't bring myself to talk to my therapist about it out of fear that talking about illness (off the site) might make me ill. As an outsider looking in, I can see how much progress you're making, and how far you've come and it's so clear to me that you're well on the road to getting better, even if it doesn't feel like it, just remember that we believe in you, and we're all here to support you through those bad days and congratulate you on the good.

I hope your cbt session went well and that you're feeling a bit better about things after it, if you stop by, please do let us know!

[Dxxr]

Thanks for your reply silent frog, I was completey gutted that I was feeling so horrible and nervous that day I find the cbt very slow in getting anywhere I know obviously it will take ages but I only get one 40 minute appoinment every 2 weeks and I feel like I need more help than this as the only thing I came out with Wednesday was how to breathe properly when having an attack ive lost a bit of hope in these appointments I know there's no quick fix for any of us but I'm just fed up feeling this way. I was so happy that I'm the few days I was feeling better I actually managed to go to a shopping mall and different places I was shocked at myself and felt great but then that day put me back into being an agoraphobic that doesn't want to go out anywhere wish I could put it to the back of my mind get up in the morning and go and not have silly thoughts that keep me in

[SilentFrog]

Hi again Dxxr, sorry for my very late reply to this!

I completely understand how you feel about being gutted. That is exactly how I was feeling just a couple of days ago when I 'relapsed' back onto my antiemetics and started having panic attacks again. I know how frustrating therapy can be, I'm going through therapy for anxiety problems and I'm lucky to get one hour long appointment a month. But over time you will get some useful skills from these appointments, and I know it's so hard and frustrating when you feel like you're not making progress, but try to look for the small victories. Try to think of every day that you don't panic or get nervous as a small triumph. Think of every time you leave the house as a victory. Slowly but surely you are battling emet and before long I'm sure you're going to win

[Dxxr]

Thank you you really do give good advice btw not just on this post fair play to u I'm slowly developing that attitude long may it last

[SilentFrog]

Thank you Dxxr, that means a lot to me When is your next therapy session btw?

[Dxxr]

It's this Wednesday coming ive a good feeling about it thou as again I feel ive improved vastly last week I went on a public bus with my son, went to register him for nursery school, went into town shopping, went good shopping and went out for a meal with not one panic attack this is major for me this time 2 months ago I'd of had severe pamic attacks doing any one of these even though they are normal day to day things I feel like I'm starting to livr again and it feels great

[SilentFrog]

That is just amazing Dxxr, you've come so far recently, made so much progress and achieved things that at the moment, I can barely imagine myself doing. It's so refreshing to read, I really hope that Wednesday goes well for you, be sure to let us know how you get on Stick with it, keep moving forward and it won't be long before you'll be well on the road to beating this phobia