I wont judge you and my advice might seem harsh hun because believe me i know it's not your fault that our heads do this to us but if you're not in a good place with you anxiety or emetophobia you shouldn't be having kids not only is being pregnant hard because hormones cause nausea and anxiety to be way over the top and labor is a pain you cant imagine and a lot of woman v* during labour for emetophobes i recomend c section so you can be put to sleep without going threw that. N even after all that is done kids get sick like crazy as there immune system builds and there messy and dirty and thats just the way they are raising one is hard on the anxiety too because kids are anxious and scared and cry all the time and you have to be the brave one if you cant be brave and show your kids your mentally a mess they will grow up to have anxiety problems too its a vicious cycle. So again im not saying to not have kids but to think about them the most and be in the best mental health you can possibly be in before you go and have one i believe with therapy and as you age and mature you'll get there.