Weird thing about my emet memories

[tiina]

Hi!


I've been thinking about this for some reason lately. There's 4 times during my whole life (I'm 22) that I remember vomiting and I think I can remember every time or every episode anyway since I was like 4 or 5. One time I vomited because of anti-biotics and one time may have been from being out in the sun too long but the other two times I don't know/remember if it was a stomach bug or what. Either way even those times I only remember vomiting once. If it was a stomach bug chances are I would've vomited several times and I don't remember that happening. I'm wondering if I did vomit several times and just can't remember it or what. Is it like this for anybody else?


Another weird thing is that I'm not sure if I was afraid when I vomited when I was 4 or 5.Three out of thesefour times I vomited were when I was about 4 or 5 and only once I remember screaming and crying. I wish I knew if I was already afraid of it back then. I THINK I was at least somewhat afraid causeone time when I got to feeling really sick (right before I vomited) I went looking for my mom and wound up throwing on my mom and dad's bed and my dad got mad at me cause I didn't go to the bathroom. I know this sounds like something that may have triggered the fearbut I'm thinking I was already at least somewhat afraid of it when that happened.Does anybody know if little kids are in generalsomewhat afraid of throwing up cause it's somethingso uncontrollable?


Either way I wish I knew if that incident with my dad triggered my fear. I feel like I must've always been this waybut if I knew there was a particular reason I got this way then I would feel like maybe it'snot so hopeless after all.


Sorry if this post was too confusing.

[hollyjean]

The incident with your dad certainly may have been the trigger, but im thinking if you remember some fear before then, maybe it was a major factor in reinforcing your fear? Anyone else got any ideas?

[raindrop]

I was always convinced that my emet was rooted in a very bad sv
that I had when I was 8 (I was ill in a hotel room, and I
remember my family could all hear me, and my mum had just remarried,
and it was all so horrid). However, when I got to thinking
about it, I remember freaking out MAJORLY before it
happened. I remember asking my mother a million times "Will I
v*?" and I remember thinking a few days earlier that I was getting "too
old " to fall prey to childish sv (where I got that from, I'll never
know!). I was obviously scared of it before this incident, but I
can only remember v* one other time as a child (and it's visual
memory, with no fear. In fact, I remember laughing right after I
did it , which was into the bath that my brother was still sitting in [img]smileys/smilies_09.gif[/img]).



I know that the incident when I was 8 had a huge impact on my fear, but
I don't think it was the root cause anymore. I can't idenitify
the root cause.

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[chicajojobe]

Yeah I'm that same way. Even back when I was little I remember being a
bit afraid of vomiting for as long as I can remember. Which is why I'm
convinced I was born with this phobia.

I remember once when my brother was ....oh he couldn't have been older
then 2 which would make me 4. I woke up one morning and found my
parents downstairs with him because he wasn't feeling well. My mom was
holding him in her arms and he started thowing up in her hand. I RAN
from the room to hide upstairs in the family room.

A few minutes later my dad came up to check on me. I told him that I
had come up to pick up this bucket of toys that I'd left laying on the
floor, and tried, I'm sure very unconvincingly, to act like I wasn't
upset. Looking back on it I'm sure he was extremely confused about what
was up with me. First I run away because my little brother is sick and
then I tell a very blatant lie about why I did it....I mean that is pretty strange behavoir
for a child isn't?


Edited by: chicajojobe

[jenneth]

i can always remeber being told off if i missed whatever i was ment to be aiming in (sorry, thats not nice...) but i think i've always been scared of v*ing, i can't remeber not being.

jen