Is it possible to never v* ever again within your lifetime?

[SophieFoxman]

Hey guys,

This is a question I've been wondering about a whole lot recently. I haven't v* in so long... almost a decade now (I'm 22), but I've been plagued with the stomach flu, virus, eaten bad things and even got food poisoning, yet I haven't v*ed in such a long time.

I ask my friends and peers a LOT about v*ing because I'm so curious on how not a lot of people fear it. I asked one of my close friend's dad, and he told me that it's actually possible not to get sick if you choose not to. What did he mean by this? Is it really possible to never v* ever again for the rest of my life? My mother also has emetophobia, but she doesn't know the term for it, she just holds it in, and will panic a bit when she feels n*. When she was pregnant, she felt so sick throughout the entire pregnancy, but she managed to hold it in.

I'm aware that v*ing is our body's natural way of getting rid of the things that are harmful to our bodies, but there are days where I'm extremely n*, and I pray to God that he'd kill me rather than make me v*. There are some days where I want to be cured from this fear more than anything, and other days where I realize that if I get over this fear, it means that mentally I would let myself v*, and I tell myself that maybe it's better to live with the fear.

[jkl81]

Welcome Sophie! I think this varies from person to person. I think it's safe to say MOST of us will unfortunately v* again sometime, but that others could go for a very long time without it based on some of the decades long no v* streaks here. You should probably read gumdropper1's v*ing FAQ---fair warning he does not censor words and there is detailed discussion of v*.

[SophieFoxman]

Thank you for your welcome!
Deep down... I know it's very unhealthy to hold in your v*, but I just don't know how to get myself to do it... Maybe it's because I haven't done it in so long, that my mind has twisted and turned the details making it way worse in my head than what it really is.

I would love to read his posts, but I'm not able to find him D:
How do I read his stuff?

[gumdropper1]

Sophie, please see my Vomiting FAQ at http://emetophobia.byethost15.com/vomiting.html. If you can't see links yet, keep making posts until you have 10.

[thecheesecake17]

I'm also in the same boat Sophie! I'm 22 and its been well over a decade since it happened but I keep reading peoples broken streaks on here and it seems to crumble when people have kids...that's obviously not to say that we won't v* til we have kids but that's generally what I hear from people around me and/or on this site. Will have a read of that article too actually!

[Afdpt]

I think it's possible but unlikely. Unlikely enough that I don't it's worth it at all to put any amount of energy into having that goal. Sure it'd be nice to just have it happen on its own, but going to extreme measures to avoid it is not worth it as it's still not even a guarantee.

It comes down to a bit of luck as well. I've had many stomach bugs where I've been able to fight off many episodes of vomiting with will power alone however I've had others where there is no way I could have fought it. Sometimes the episodes are just more intense and we have less control. One of these bugs is actually what started my fear, however I've since realized that that wasn't the norm and most bugs are way more tame.

So, possible? Yes. Likely? Not as much. Worth daily stress and emetophobic rituals? Not at all.

[alex.j]

I think it's possible to go a very long time, but unlikely for the rest of one's life. My longest streak was 10 years, and my mom is already at 10 years right now. My grandma had gone several decades before she broke her streak.

See here a list of no-v* streaks (warning: words not censored): http://emetophobia.byethost15.com/streaks.html

[pogopig]

I agree it's possible but extremely unlikely. Definitely not worth ruining your life worrying about it. I lasted more than 20 years without vomiting and I started to think I never would. Then one night I felt really sick and no amount of will power prevented me from eventually vomiting. I didn't 'mentally let myself' be sick, I had no choice. Anyway it wasn't that bad. Thinking about it before hand was the worst thing. I'm absolutely sure it's NOT better to live with this fear. Do everything you can to beat it.

[jkl81]

I don't know that it's deeply unhealthy not to let yourself v*. There are certain circumstances when it needs to happen, for instance when you ingest a poison, especially one for which there is no antidote, like methanol, but most of us will never ingest something like that. SV will resolve on their own if you v* or not. You v* or have d* from inflammation of you small intestine. FP usually either is a toxin like staphylococcus generated enterotoxin or Bacillus cereus enterotoxin, and these are often v*ed up or forced out the other way before you could take measures to stop symptoms. Other types tend to be less likely to cause v* and cause whatever mischief they do days or hours after exposure where v* wouldn't help in any case as the causative agent is gone from your stomach. That having been said, there is never a guarantee about being able to get around it, and even if there were it's not worth living an unhappy life to avoid. Some reasonable precautions can be taken that will cut out most common reasons for v*ing with minimal concessions to emetophobia, however and I don't see anything wrong with that. We all have to decide for ourselves where we draw the line.

[SophieFoxman]

I LOVED this. It gave me some reassurance and hope that maybe I won't have to get sick anymore.
This was extremely informative and answered a lot of questions I was too shy to ask my professor!

[SophieFoxman]

That scares me! I've heard of some people going years and years without getting sick, and all of a sudden, it happens.
I'm sure everyone is different, and it could've been detrimental to their health, so that's a plus, but I just wish v*ing wasn't designed to be so unpleasant.
I have a theory that the whole idea of v*ing is worse when you don't do it in a long time. Because I remember looking back to the very last time I got sick, and it was twice in a roll in the same night. The first time around I panicked, but the second time, I don't remember myself freaking out, but as time passed by, and I haven't been sick, I developed the fear again. 😩

[SophieFoxman]

What you said gave me hope 🙂.
And I think you're right... I feel like my fear is mainly from over-thinking it.
The two times I've ever v* was always projectile and it really scared me. I don't think I would mind if the flow was light, but it was really violent and it scarred me.

[jkl81]

Sophie,
The author of the V*ing FAQ certainly thinks you're right about non v*ers becoming emetophobic, If it's not too triggering you should read that page. That is gumdropper's page and he posted a link a bit upthread.

[thecheesecake17]

I suddenly got scared reading this tbh as I always think I'm gonna be OK and I usually am but there are times like three nights ago when for the first time in forever I felt my stomach flip...and it was literally SCARY... It's such a rubbish thing to obsess over though. My goal is to laugh it off as my dad did when he saw a mouse in our kitchen one time, we were all freaking out and he said "Ladies, ladies can we all calm down? It's just a mouse. I'm bored!"

[SophieFoxman]

Aww you poor thing, I'm so sorry to hear that ):
I really loathe those nights... I cannot stand it! I always like to tell myself of all the people who got sick and still survived. I even got sick a decade ago, yet here I am. It's just a different story when I'm ACTUALLY nauseous. Like right now, I'm not feeling sick, so I feel like I'm on top of the world, and that getting sick isn't as bad, but when I AM nauseous... Lord have mercy... I will flip a switch lol.

[pogopig]

I know you probably won't believe this but if you get really sick you will handle it. You may be upset and anxious but it will NOT be as bad as you think. Try not to waste your life worrying about something that may not happen for a loooooooooooong time.

[blackrabbit]

Aww you poor thing, I'm so sorry to hear that ):
I really loathe those nights... I cannot stand it! I always like to tell myself of all the people who got sick and still survived. I even got sick a decade ago, yet here I am. It's just a different story when I'm ACTUALLY nauseous. Like right now, I'm not feeling sick, so I feel like I'm on top of the world, and that getting sick isn't as bad, but when I AM nauseous... Lord have mercy... I will flip a switch lol.

I'm the same exact way as you whereas sometimes I woudl rather die than be n* and v*. I've been going through a rough time lately because I am tapering off Lexapro. This causes withdrawal symptoms (mine are anxiety and nausea mostly). It's a VISCIOUS cycle. Sometimes IDK if I am nauseas because I'm anxious or if I'm actually sick. Let me tell you, I'm a huge hypochondriac. I don't think ONE day has gone by since like last April where I haven't thought I wasn't going to be sick. I always think I am coming down with something. It sucks because I am a prisoner of my own mind.

Anyway, yeah, we are very much alike in our fear of this STUPID phobia. I always say I wish I was a rabbit or a horse because they are both incapable of v*. lol.

[Pigatron]

It seems somewhat unlikely, but not impossible. My uncle who is now deceased said he hadn't done it since he was drunk as a teenager, so basically his entire adult life. I haven't done it since I was 13, which was 26 years ago. In one sense, I'm happy about that record, but on the other hand, this phobia has impacted my life in a substantial way so I'm sure I would be better off overall if I just v* from time to time like a normal person and instead of suffering with this damn phobia for my entire life. I wouldn't say it's totally ruined my life because I still have very good phases where I feel calm and confident, but the phobia is always there, and I never lapse in my "preventative measures," which can be time consuming (eg., excessive hand washing, not touching things, not eating certain things, etc.). Also, I don't have kids. I've never been that into kids, but if I didn't have this phobia, who knows, maybe I would've gone for it.

I did catch some horrible bug in 2010, and felt so incredibly n* for an entire day, on and off with severe waves of it that sent me into total panic mode. Some of the worst panic attacks I've ever had were that day. I even went into the bathroom at one point and crouched over the toilet, in a complete mind-numbing panic, but I somehow held it in. It was very traumatizing. I never want to feel like that again. It's such a vicious cycle. I don't want the phobia, but I really don't want to v*.

[cmsois]

I would love to be reassured that I would never v* again for the rest of my life, but unfortunately that likely isn't true and there's no way to know that. Those kinds of thoughts are unproductive and can be damaging, especially when you spend every day of your life wondering if the next time you will v* will be today. I've been really trying to change those thoughts-- instead of thinking "I wish I could never v* again" I think, "It doesn't happen to me often at all, but it has happened before and I have gotten through it. It's very unlikely that it will happen today, but if it did, I would be okay." Just learning to recognize harmful thoughts and working on replacing them with positive, more reasonable ones can really make an impact.