New here.. Help?

[jolienej]

Hi there.. I'm a Mom to two amazing boys, ages 3.5 and my youngest is 1 in just a couple weeks. I always struggled with the fear of a stomach bug as a kid, but it was only if I had just gotten it. I didn't worry about it daily like I do now. I didn't even worry daily until I had our second baby and then it really got bad. I'm not scared of vomit, I'm TERRIFIED of my toddler suddenly saying his belly hurt and throwing up. I'm terrified of the stomach bug. I ask him a hundred times a day if he's ok. He sometimes answers me but he's a little behind on speech so I don't know if he's actually telling me the truth. So it's very frustrating. Just tonight, he said his belly hurt and then he passed gas, but it was RIGHT as I was putting him to bed so now I'm panicking in tears just staring at him on my video monitor. I do blends of Doterra oils to help with immunity, I give him black elderberry syrup, a probiotic and lots of vitamin C. I'm so scared he's suddenly going to wake up and cry for me. I get so scared when I see him move on the monitor, fearing that something is wrong or something is hurting him. I can barely eat anymore and I've lost weight when I shouldn't, and I'm still breast feeding our youngest so I need to get myself under control. Someone please help me. I feel like a prisoner.

[CMM811]

First of all EAT! Your nursing baby needs that nourishment to grow healthy and strong! Second of all, and to be blunt and honest, kids get sick, it sucks like really really bad and we want to run and hide but we are moms and we find ways to deal with it. Do you have a supportive significant other? Mine didn't really understand my phobia until I let him read posts on here, then he was like "whoa ok babe, while I can't really understand I get it." He knows I have good and bad days, he knows I worry but he also knows (and tells me all the time) I'm strong and I can do it, and not in a jerk way but a understanding way. My kids have gotten sick in the night and in the day, first time my youngest got sick she was 2, and she got sick in her crib in the middle of the night never heard her and she went to the other side and went back to sleep! I felt so sad and ashamed but we never knew it happened until she woke up 5 hours after her normal time. My son is older and he's pretty good about making it to the toilet, and my girl has started to get the jist of it. But she's gotten sick on furniture and my kitchen floor ugh. I'm not saying all this to scare you but they can vomit for any reason. The kitchen floor was a mixture of eating some old yogurt she found (gross) too much water and then doing the bunny hop around the kitchen for 10 minutes never felt sick came up and she was like uh oh gross mom. Of course my heart pounded but cleaned it up and that was that. I won't lie I have nights I lay awake and listen then eventually drift off to sleep and they wake up right as rain in the am, it's part of being a mom. I think even non-emet moms have that worry of putting their kids down and they seem off to them they get that nervous "please don't be getting sick" thoughts. It's not just us, ours is just bigger. But I promise you, you aren't alone and you can do it. My best advise is getting a support system, and having that talk with them not in the midst of a freak out but just one day saying hey this is my life I am doing the best I can but I may need you type talk. It took me 7 years to do it with my mother in law and now she will be to my house in minutes to help when I need her if the hubby isn't around, and it's not just for me to run and hide its just the support and understanding. Being a mom is hard, it's hard work but at the end of the day it's rewarding. And when they do get sick it's over generally pretty quick and then it will be behind you.
Oh and I use dōTERRA oils too all day everyday! My kids have their favorites and we are always diffusing something rolling something or rubbing something!

[KimberlyP]

Hello and welcome!

Im not a professional or anything but you sound like me. It sounds like postpartum anxiety, especially how you said that it started after your second child, mine did too and how you said you fear something is hurting him, I feared the same thing. Eventually it led to a nervous breakdown after a traumatic event. I highly highly highly suggest you seek treatment because postpartum anxiety is completely treatable. I waited six years to seek any kind of real treatment and I'm just barely now on the road to recovery.

[jolienej]

A friend of mine thought it was postpartum anxiety too but I didn't think it would start this late after having him? It started probably about 6 months pp and it's just gotten worse. I have "ok" days and then very bad days. I had a little bit of depression (like I did with my first) at about 3 weeks pp but it was gone by a week. What would I tell my doctor and what can be done about it? I really don't want to take any meds but I can't live like this anymore either.

[jolienej]

My friend mentioned that it could be a form of postpartum anxiety, but I didn't think it would turn up this late? I've always kind of had the fear, but it definitely wasn't like this until my youngest was about 6 months old. My toddler actually got the SV on Easter last year, while I was about 25 weeks pregnant. I got it a few days later, and then my husband. but it was all done with by that week and we were fine. It was terrible, especially while pregnant, but we survived. so I know that SV is NOT the end of the world and they're not that bad, but for some reason i'm just terrified that my toddler is going to get it (especially now while i've got a second kid to take care of as well). It's not the vomit that i'm scared of, it's just the "mom my belly hurts" and not knowing why it hurts and the anxiety and fear that comes along with that waiting for something to happen or for it to (hopefully) pass. I was thinking of talking to my doctor about it but what would he do? I really don't want to take anxiety meds but I also can't live like this anymore. It's effecting my sleep and my eating habits and I really shouldn't lose anymore weight. My husband knows of my fear, but I don't think he knows how serious it is. He just tells me to not let it bother me so much. It's gotten extremely bad. I lysol the shopping carts or I wait for my husband to be on days off before I get groceries so I can make sure my kids don't get out in public. THat can't go on for very long, I don't want them to live in a bubble. Especially since our toddler is starting preschool in September. I need relief before then because I know I'm going to be a WRECK once he starts school and is exposed to all of that. I'm such a wreck I can't get this off of my mind!!