University classes... a nightmare!!!

[Niki_N]

Hi everyone!
I am 18yo and last year i had my first panic attack and it wasn't the feeling of not being able to breath that terrified me but that i felt sick.Since i remember myself i was terrified with the idea of vomiting and i still remember every single time.After that day (panic attack) , i started to fell sick all day long, every day... especially under stress.the outcome was that i stopped going out,i never enjoy anything anymore outside because the idea of me vomiting infront of people was even worse than just the idea of V.

Now i am a university student and everyday i feel really nauseous and i always checking where the wc is before going in any classes and if it is far i totally freak out and cant concetrate even for a second in the class!Also at the lectures i always sit as close as possible next to the door and always at the last chair.The thing is that being a veterinary medicine student its imposiible to not see or smell things that will make you nauseaous and my biggest fear will happen in two days that i will go in the dessection room for anatomy!And trust me just the smell of the bones is disgusting, and i cant stop thinking about what will happen if i smell the dead animal.Sometimes you see disgusting things but you look at the animal and it looks at you and the only think going through my mind that time is what i can do to help but with just a part of animal just looking muscles that doesn't work or at least i think that it won't.The past couple of days i couldn't sleep just with the idea of ''having THE accident'' in front of my class or just having IT privately and i can't stop thinking about it and well that makes me nauseous!I was thinking about taking a vomit-stop pill before class, i dont know if it works for odours but having the thought that it helps i think it will make me less stressed about it. What can i do to stop thinking about it? i also thought about not going but that it isn't the solution and i will have to go next week so i cant avoid it but just the idea freaks me out!!

Anyway, I just accidently found the site and reading about my phobia and seeing that other peaple can understand it completly and not jugding it was really helpfull. I already feel better.I don't believe that it is a problem that people should or could jugde you about but it's definately a problem for us because it doesn't let us enjoyning all the parts of life,i mention that because i read somewhere that people feel bad about discussing it because they are afraid of being jugded .

Since i don't do anything outside if i decide to do something i choose something that i know that will make me happy so my mind will not think about well you know... That works for me but I still avoid trying...

Please, give me some advices.

Niki
(sorry for my english but it isn't my first language)

[chazz]

I too am 18 years old and I will be starting college in the fall. I also don't do anything with friends or enjoy going anywhere or going to work. I try to sit closest to the door in my class as well. Whenever I go somewhere I make sure I know where the bathrooms are. I feel like crap constantly and I've had this phobia my whole life. I haven't V since like 9 years ago but the thought is always on my mind. I want to experience college so badly but the thought of going to college and living in the dorms scares me so much I can't even describe it. I joined this site about a week ago and I've never done anything like this before but I so badly want help with this especially before I start college. I would love to talk more with you one on one if you would be interested

[BBopper]

Hi Niki darling,

I don't know if it helps to hear it, but I know how you feel. I graduated from university almost two years ago, and a large portion of my time was spent worrying about being in close quarters with sick students, and many of the same things you've described. I had two panic attacks in my last year, and both times I was so afraid of being sick in front of people. It didn't happen either time. I've found that putting my hand on my chest and applying a bit of pressure while taking deep belly breaths helps. It's kind of a comfort for yourself to remind yourself that you're ok.

About the smells, you could try doing something like putting Vaporub under your nose before going into the lab. That stuff is so potent you might not smell anything else whatsoever! A strong gum could help too, and may keep your mouth and mind occupied enough where you won't feel as nauseous as you might otherwise. I don't know if it helps or not, but whenever I'd get grossed out by things in the lab, I'd just remind myself how "clean" they are. And by clean I mean soaked in enough chemicals that it can't hurt me, and that took some of the threat out of it, if that was any concern of yours.

You'll be ok. Just spend some time finding smells you like that you could wear or put under your nose when you go to the lab that either are so strong that it's all you can smell, or provide you some comfort.

Be well,

Elizabeth

[Niki_N]

Thank you Elizabeth!!

[Niki_N]

I would like that too!