Bad timing - no one around

[Lavalife10]

Or as my brain wants to tell me, they are there, they just don’t want to answer you. I am facing possibly getting sick and maybe *v, but for the quality of the rest of my life and I could use someone like me saying it can be done. That it is terrifying, but making sure that I stay sober so my children have one parent is worth several *v if that is what it takes. Other people say that and they don’t understand that I would rather die than get that sick, but if someone here really thinks I can get through it, maybe I will believe it.

[Lavalife10]

I’ve been messaging for over five hours hoping for some help. I have friends in recovery helping with that part, but they don’t understand that I drank amongst other things and never *v. It doesn’t bother them at all. They just say, you just do it and it sucks and then it’s over. Or, “no one likes it Jamie” or even, “oh, I totally know what you mean it’s the worst” but they don’t understand how it controls everything. Where I go, what I do? I continue to take pain medication that I want to get off of for spiritual reasons and so that I don’t end up in relapse and I am too afraid to *v to really live my life. It’s like I have to figure out how to live with this debilitating phobia and without any anxiety meds or wine and without my husband who handled the sick kids. I don’t know if I can live my life the way it is right now. It’s too scary. I’m not strong enough.

[Srk2756]

You can do it. It's the anxiety that makes it so much worse. Hang in there!!

[Hannahhoch]

You got this. What’s inside you is greater than anything you will face - even *v.