Hello I haven't been here for a long time because I have been fine until recently. So I was accepted to stay for one week at my dream university and take a class there. It's an intense program but I thought I was able to handle it since my anxiety has been good. I had my medication with me so I thought nothing could stop me. Well I was wrong.
Ever since I heard that people get sick from eating at the campus, I been worried about eating. So I only ate very little because I was afraid of the food there. Not only that but at night was also horrible because I could not fall asleep and my anxiety was very high at that time. I guess I should mention I have never been away from my parents so maybe that's why it was so high. Eventually I just feel anxious throughout the whole day to the point where I just gave up on day 4 (there were 10 days) and went home. I basically messed everything up thanks to my anxious. Tomorrow was suppose to be my ceremony but instead I am here just letting my anxiety beat me again. I am now afraid to try anything new because my anxiety will show up again. I am so mad at myself because I had people who were willing to help me but I left like a coward. I hate this phobia soooooo much it makes me wanna scaream. Sometimes I wonder if all this anxiety is ever worth it. Thank you all forr reading.
TLDR: Went to take a course at my dream school for a week but I felt nothing but anxiety so I decide to leave the program and now I feel stuck.