Hi there. I'm new to this forum and this is my first post here So I've had emetophobia since I was around 4 years old, I'm now 30.

Lately it's been increasingly difficult to be in control of my everyday life. About two months ago my girlfriend got food poisoning while on a trip in Vienna - I didn't get sick though - and to me it was a complete nightmare since I couldn't be sure it wasn't contagious. And ever since everything is spiraling out of control, after years of being able to live a relatively normal life. Now I'm afraid to eat basically everything not cooked at home. I figure that if the food is bad I'll get poisoned within the first 7-8 hours, so I have this countdown every time I eat.

Moreover, my stomach is completely destroyed by all the anxiety. I wake up early in the mornings with diarrhea and cold sweats several times a week, I've got constant hunger pangs even if I've just recently eaten. And if I manage to have a day without an upset stomach, then rest assured that I'll feel an imaginary hair stuck in my throat that won't go away for hours, making me nauseous. I'm always super tense with shaky legs, shallow breathing, nausea etc etc, the classic symptoms.

I am also afraid of eating things that could get stuck in my mouth and make me gag, such as tomato peels, seeds or too much melted cheese. This is also becoming increasingly more difficult to control. I'm seeing a therapist, but at the moment all she makes me do is taking notes when I can't control my anxiety and I can't really see the point of that. A full-blown panic attack is often around the corner and I usually take some diazepam to counter it in advance. Obviously this is not a viable long-term solution.

Do you guys have any suggestions on what I should do?