Hi all! I’m new here. I’m 21 and I’m just feeling so useless. I’ve had emet for about 8 years and it hasn’t gotten better, it’s gotten a tad worse since I’ve entered the adult world. I’ve been moving around also so whenever I get to a new place, the cycle of phobias creeps up again. It’s exhausting. I’ve also been traveling to other states and every time I step on a plane I feel so out of control with my emet. Things have become a lot more scary now tht I am adult. I thought my fears and phobias would ease up a little now that I’m older and in a better headspace but they haven’t. And that makes me mad. I want to go out and have fun and enjoy being young. But my emet keeps me from so many opportunities. So. Many. I want to live life so badly, I want to eat different foods, I want to go out and have drinks with friends. I want to enjoy holidays and not worry about what I’m eating. I want to enjoy flights and traveling in general. I want to not worry about how many times I’ve washed my hands in a day. I want to look at something involving sickness and not think about it for the next three days. I want to go to parties I get invited to and not have to flake because of uncertainty and fear. I want to do so many things while I have the opportunities to do them (being young and having fun), but it’s hard for me. As it is with everyone who suffers from emet. And it’s even harder when you’re alone and no one understands how or why you struggle. Especially family. I just feel like a loser. I know I’ll never be this young ever again and I would really love to enjoy myself.
Anyways.. thanks for listening. Tonight has been a bad night for my emet. Just thought I would share how I have been feeling lately.
- Maria xx