OT(sort of): SV Anxiety/Pregnancy Blues

[aar13]

Hi all!


I'm just here to vent and look for some support since I'm having a real bad day. The sv* is going around here pretty hard right now and my anxiety is quite high because I'm so afraid my daughter (5 yrs. old) is going to get it. I wake up several times in night worried that she is going to be sick and v*.


I am 32 weeks pregnant and very uncomfortable with acid reflux, indigestion, heartburn, n* - you name it I have it and my belly feels so tight. I was also in a very bad car accident on 2/15 and have a sore foot (which they say isn't fractured but I swear it is) and still can't sleep at night since it happened.


I could go on and on but don't want to bore anyone. I just feel like I want to cry and at the same time I'm really panicky because my whole entire body is just so uncomfortable! My husband is no help either since all he does is complain about how I have no sex drive and that he is sexually frustrated. He doesn't care too much about how I'm feeling right now and doesn' t want to listen. I feel like I'm falling out of love with him more and more each day and it's scaring me because we have this baby boy on the way and we've only been married for 1 1/2 years.


UGH! I know I just need to calm down and relax but because I'm so worn down both physically and mentally I just can't take it anymore! I have 8 more weeks to go (hopefully less) and I just can't wait.


Anyway, I just needed to vent and get my feelings out and I thank anyone who takes the time to read this. [img]smileys/smilies_06.gif[/img]

[violet]

Hey hun,

Sorry to hear about this current situation you are in!!

I do think alot of it will be to do with the discomfort ect with being so far on in your pregnancy!

I can see how you would also be a little how shall we put it miffed about your husband at the moment,I also would be a bit annoyed with that statement!

I think the best thing to do be doing at the moment is maybe a very small walk in the fresh air may help the anxiety,somewhere maybe away from people even if it is in your back yard get some air then prop yourself up with some pillows and a cuppa tv on and maybe some chocolates they are good for you [img]smileys/smilies_02.gif[/img] lol...

dont worry at all about the venting we all need to at times,we are here to listen to your troubles as well!!

Keep us posted and if you need anything my pm box is always open xxx

[curly wurly]

Poor you Alissa


The last weeks of pregnancy are always an emotional time and you really do not need all these other stressful things happening. I am sorry your foot is still hurting.


Have you tried discussing with your husband just how bad you feel? My husband also complained of my low sex drive whilst pregnant and even on the evening before I was induced with my son, but I was able to tell him how I was feeling and he respected that(even though he teased about finding another woman). I really think you need to tell him exactly how you are feeling. You really need his support at the moment.


I wish I could say something to make you feel better. You have had such a hard time lately. I hope you feel a bit better soon. I will be thinking of you.

[aar13]

Thank you Sally and Violet both for responding. Your support really means a great deal to me since I'm just having such a bad time right now. I'm really just trying to relax and take it easy now that I'm so close to the end of my pregnancy but with working full time and taking care of my daughter and my house it is just soooooo hard! My husband was actually gone for 6 days to Las Vegas and it was the best 5 nights of sleep that I've had in a long time.....I actually was dredding him coming home and that's horrible but my true feelings at this point.


We have only been married since November 2004, but for some reason I just lost that feeling of love for him - I just keep learning more and more that he has no sympathy or compassion and he is not very supportive of my anxiety and emet either which makes things even harder.


So thanks for listening guys. I really appreciate having a place to come and vent since that even makes me feel better!

[s_snow]

Take care, take vitamines, dont worry to much. You are pregnent and wach outbecause your baby.


I wish you all the best!!!!

[aar13]

Thanks s_snow. I appreciate your advice. I am taking my vitamins every day and just trying to rest and relax so that nothing happens with the baby in these next few weeks.


Thanks for caring!

[crimgoddess]

Would it work to perhaps create a list of priorities and how to achieve them, since at the moment a few things seem to bother you/are in need of help? It may help because at the moment you may feel as though you are stuck in a sort of pregnancy limbo- maybe organizing a little bit may make you feel a bit more in control.


Perhaps something along the lines of: (just grabbing straws here- bear with me! )


Priority #1elivering a healthy baby


How to achieve this: Rest, eating properly, taking prenatal vitamins, etc.


Priority #2: Retain a healthy relationship with husband


How to achieve this: attempt to keep the lines of communication open, attempt to understand his position while clearly stating yours, bring up the idea of counselling, try to organize an evening alone together (note: does not need to involve sex), etc


Priority #3: ......


How to achieve this: ......


I don't know if my undergrad in psychology has given me the need to classify and categorize- but I do find it helps when you are in situations where you feel you have very little control. At least if your thoughts and concerns are on paper, it makes them easier to vocalize and possible solutions become more apparent.


Goodluck with everything- and is it possible to get a second opinion on your foot? Just to make sure everything is intact and where it is supposed to be?


*amber*

[donna1216]

My husband used to be the same way, we have been together 7 years and it has only been the past year or so that he has gained some compassion and iunderstanding toward me and my emet,and it took till the 3rd kid for him to stop whining about sex during pregnancy, now 9 mos. after my son's birth he is complaining again!! Just hang in there, it takes them until they are at least 30 to be remotely human!!

[aar13]

Thank you Amber for your suggestion to organize my thoughts and put them down in writing. I am a VERY organized person when it comes to work related things and my house .... but when it comes to something like this I am just scatter brained because there are so many negative things going on right now. That is a very helpful suggestion that I plan to put to use. And I actually thought about going to an orthopedic surgeon to make sure that my foot is not broken or fractured since it has now been 4 weeks and I'm still in a lot of pain.


Well Donna, thank you as well for your support. I do know that my husband is still immature and has growing up to do because he is only 27, but I just don't get it because when I first met him and got together with him I thought that he was the most compassionate and caring man in the world - just in the past year things have really turned around and I'm not sure why. So it took your husband a while to actually "get it?" Great, I don't know if right now I have the strength to wait it out But I'm glad to hear that one day he might start to understand and be supportive.


Thanks again ladies! Alissa