It is 3 am and I can't stand this. I have been "in contact" with you all for
several months just by reading what you have posted, but afraid to write.
I feel like if I talk too much about the phobia, I will perseverate on it and
it will make it worse. I have had d* for almost 24 hours. I have spent all
day worrying that I will v*. I had myself convinced that it was just stress
related and due to the fact that I hadn't eaten much the past few days b/c
of stress. (my 8 year old son was transported to the hospital this week
from school...not a phone call a mom likes to get at work [img]smileys/smilies_06.gif[/img] . When I
journaled, there was a ton more stuff that had me stressed. But, the d*
shouldn't be taking this long to go away! I am fairly certain that I am
dehydrated, since I can't seem to keep any fluids in me. Do I go to the
hospital? My husband is on duty for firefighting and I can't leave the kids
home alone with him and I feel terrible calling someone at this time of the
night to come over. I try to talk to him, but the phobia is so hard for him
to understand. He has dealt with me and this for so long. He is great,
but will never truly understand it. I hate the middle of the night....this is
the worst. I of course then freak out just waiting for one of my kids to
get it with dad going out of town! Why can't I just be normal and have
this NOT consume every hour of everyday! Does anyone else ever wish
that they could be phobic of something else, not something that could be
an everyday occurence? I don't have to fly in an airplane everyday....why
couldn't I be afraid to fly instead? I have had it and I'm at my wits end....