Working Moms (and Dads)

[jennyleigh1975]

Im just curious how many of you work, esp. those of you that have two parents working. See, I want to work, but I would feel bad about not being at home. This is me personally I am talking about, Im certainly not judging what others do. I really do want to work, but I dont know why I keep holding myself back. I think its because I would feel like I was earing all this extra money, but wouldnt have any time to enjoy it. Does that make sense? If I could find something I could do from home, or waork part-time, I dont think I would have a problem. I wanna see how others juggle things.

[suze]

I work full time but I have a flexible job which allows me to work from home if necessary, and allows me to pick my kids up from school, and drop them off, most days. It is difficult, and at times I feel guilty, but I know it's something I have to do. Work is my sanctuary, it's where I go to feel 'me' rather than 'mum'. Both my kids were at nursery full time before they started school and they don't seem to have suffered from it; they are both bright, confident, and socially well-adjusted.


I think I would have been happy taking a couple of years off work but my husband at the time was money driven and thought all our lives would be better by having two incomes. I have a good job too but it's not easy to get back into if you take time out; I'm well-qualified in what I do but those qualifications don't mean much outside of my sphere of work. Now I'm separated, stopping work is not an option.


I think there is also pressure now on women to show they can combine career and parenthood, but it is hard work. Saying that, I think if you feel you would like to go back to work, even if it's just part time, then go for it. The money will be useful and you'll get some 'time-out' from the home. Go with how you feel - it doesn't work for everyone, but I don't think I could function any other way.

[californiagirl]

Hi Jenny~~


Well, my hubby works outside the home, sometimes 12 to 14 hours a day. He comes home, exhausted, and wanting just to eat, watch TV for a couple hours, then go to bed. I see that this is very draining, day in and day out, only to wake up and do it all again the next day. I honestly feel very bad for him, that he works so hard with no vacation time in 2 years! I am a paralegal, and have chosen the risky path of marketing myself and going out to seek work from attorneys (who aren't very easy to talk to sometimes). Then I wait for people to call me. I got lucky with this one atty. who is soooooo nice, he gives me semi-regular work and gives me great references for more work. I have also signed up with a temp agency (a good option for you maybe?) who staffs only freelance paralegals. they got me this one great position that I'm doing now, which is full time, plus OT if I want, ALL from home. I do like working from home, for obvious reasons, but find that I do get distracted and veer off path at times. BUT, the upside is, that I can work any hours of the day for any amount of hours, depending on how much $$ I wanna make. So, (sorry for the looong reply), in answer to your inquiry: I feel that I do need to work, but I'm also a mother, wife, maid, nurse, etc., so working from home certainly enables me to do all these tasks and know that I am contributing financially which is important to my hubby. For me, working outside the home is difficult, but that's me, and there are many women who prefer to do so, which works perfect for them. So, I say set out to do what makes you feel comfortable, and what works for your family's needs.[img]smileys/smilies_01.gif[/img]

[bandnerd]

I work full time as aschool teacher, with summers off. My husband works 12-14 hours a day as a project manager for a large company, but is able to work out of our home from a home office. We also own quite a bit of real estate that we manage and repair mostly ourselves. We also have children ages 3 and 5 that keep us busy. Sometimes I wonder how we do manage it all! The work is hard but we have a terrific house and our kids hurt for nothing.........


BandNerd

[shiva]

I started working full time when my daughter started school. She's 9 now and it works out fine. Before then I would take part time jobs here and there to have a little spending money and get out of the house. I, like you, felt (feel) guilty about any time not spent with my daughter. What I have done to help me not feel guilty is that we always had family members watching our daughter, so it wasn't like strangers were 'raising' her, but she was spending quality time with family. When it was time for pre-school, I found work that I could schedule around the pre-school schedule. I have also been blessed with jobs that allow me to make my own schedule and leave to get Jade from school or take her to appointments. I can even bring her to work if need be. There are many possibilites out there if you want to work full or part time. Just take the time to find the right situation for you and your family.

[6pksummer]

I work full time, and so does hubby. I am on 2nd shift, he is on 3rd. 3 kids, ages 11, 6, 4. @ out of the 3 are in baseball/softball. We have 4 games a week to go to. I really really hate working, cause I am missing my kids. During the school year, I don't see them, except for the 20-30 mins before they go to school, and then on the weekends. I would like to work part time, so that way I can work during the day when the kids are in school and then be home for them at night. I don't see that happening anytime soon. Who says money doesn't buy happieness!

[zane2673]

I work second shift. I was working 4 to 8 but in March I bumped my hours up until 11 pm thanks to Medicare part d. I work for Health Net of Arizona but our call center is based in Connecticut so thats why my hours are so late . My kids are little. My oldest is going in to Kindergarten next year and my youngest to preschool. The only downside is I don't get to see my husband much during the week and weekends are always hectic. Once my son goes to first grade, I'll change my hours to got in at either 5 or 6, so I can be home with my son more once he's in school all day. I've worked like this since my son was born and I have to say I'd rather work 2nd shift than 1st.

[marby]

I work full time, but recently gave up the "corporate" 60 hour a week routine because I didn't feel like I was a part of my family anymore. I now work a standard 40 hour work week, but I will admit the position doesn't challenge or excite me. For me, it was a decision that the needs of the many (my family) outweighed the needs of the one (me). I'm not happy professionally anymore, but I get to have dinner with my family, see my kids' sporting events and spend quaility time with them every evening and all weekend now. As everyone said, it's such a personal choice. For me, having an outlet that allows me to feel that I contribute to my family's financial well being AND makes me feel worthwhile as an idividual allows me to be a more well-rounded happy person. When someone is happy - they are able to be the best mother, spouse they can be. Sorry - this is long winded.... I think the bottom line is whatever make a person happier is what they should do. You know the old saying, "If momma isn't happy - no one is happy"!!