Does anyone share my feelings?

[scaredtodeath]

Hi everyone. I would like to start by saying that I am amazed you are all here...I thought I was in this on my own but I literally just fled my best friend's babies first b-day party because her nephew kept coughing until he gagged and I knew that I needed to learn more about my problems.


I have had emetophobia (a term I just learned tonight!)since age six when my well-meaning grandmother scared the crap out of me during a stomach flu episode by holding my head over the toilet with a death-like grip. Ever since then (I am now 32), its been all over for me. I have had many crazy experience associated with v***t (I only spell it out that way to be considerate to those readers who panic at the sight of the word...I just got over that glich myself)...enough to fill a book, and some of which I will eventually post, but none of these exposures have helped me. In fact, they have only served in increasing my anxieties. Couple this with the fact that I thought I was the only person on the face of the earth with this problem and no wonder I live in a constant state of panic.


Another reason whyI've decided to seek information and, fingers crossed, help is because my husband seems tobe starting to want children...which we all know are little v***t factories. I realizedduring our conversation thatmyentire life is limited by this horrible phobiaand that my future will be as well if I don't get a grip. I have let this phobia make my decisions, limit my activities, and now it is threatening to destroy a happy home life. Ihave toput a stop to it but I just don't knowwhere to begin.


I was looking at some otherstories about people who have recovered and I began to panic at the thought that my phobia may actually be gone one day...how crazy is that? I think it was more anxiety about the possibility that I may actually be aroundv***ters, but I'm not sure.


Anyway, I am happy to have found you all and I hope that this is the start of my recovery. It is going to be hard, but considering what I have been going through for the last 28 years, it will probably be the best thing I will have done to date.


Thanks everyone and I look forward to learning more about this life-stripping phobia and ways to overcome it.

[kasey]

Oh of course I and we all share your feelings...I have had this dang phobia since I was very young and I am 28...I have never gone through treatment, but I am in therapy now.


We all understand...I am so glad that you found this site...It has helped me tremendously and I hope it does the same for you.


Where are you from?


Kasey

[ginger_saves]

WELCOME! Lots of folks on here are helpful! Make sure to rant if you need to and don't be afraid to ask questions. There are many nice people on here. Good luck!!

[kasey]

Oh and feel free to be completely candid and irrational...I do it at least twice a day...I ask about the neighbors uncles sisters cousin who has a sv* and can I possibly catch it!

[scaredtodeath]

Thanks guys. Kasey - I am from Toronto, Ontario, Canada. It seems that there are a disproportionate number of v***ters here...more on that later! Anyway, I just told my mom about this site and as it turns out she suffers from the same phobia but only in a milder form. I always knew she disliked the act but to learn that she understands my fears is really refreshing. To think, we lived under the same roof for 26 years and we never talked about this. Just goes to show you how this phobia is really "hidden". Also, maybe we are a case for the physchological literature? Interesting to think.


Thanks again guys for the warm intro.I look forward to learning more about everyone and becoming part of the community!


Amy

[domino2006]

I absolutely share your feelings. I've been trying to figure what this thing is for years now! I tried to tell my mom about it the other night and she didn't seem to understand. We are here for you and love to share advice and sympathy!

Steph

[kasey]

Where are you from Steph?

[domino2006]

I'm in Arizona. I'm 29 years old. I've been so afraid to talk to anyone about any of this stuff and this place is so open and accepting! I love it! Do you tell your parents about these things? How do they respond? I suspect my Dad is an emet, but I don't know how to open up the door to talk about it with him.

Steph

[kasey]

I am with you...I am 28...Well, My Mom has known that I feared v* but when I actually found this site and realized it was an actual phobia, I told her...They sorta are like "Ok Kasey, whatever, you are fine"...Thankfully my Fiance is so supportive. It's not that my parents don't care, they just don't understand...Most people don't understand...That is why I come here so often because everyone here is like me and they can talk me through a situation or a panic attack. I am so glad you found this site because it has helped me so much. I would just ask your Dad. Be blunt, what's the worst that could happen?


Are you married? How long have you been Emet?

[domino2006]

No, I'm not married. I had a long-term boyfriend that I'm just now over so, who knows?

I've been emet ever since I was about four! I don't know what triggered it, but that year my oldest brother was shot and I saw him in the ambulance (I don't know what that has to do with v* so I'm still trying to figure that out). He survived, but as a result developed a very bad stomach ulcer and was sick all the time, but I don't remember ever seeing or hearing him v*. Could that be it? Around that time, maybe a year later, I came down with a sv* and I don't remember it very well but I remember afterward I was terrified of v* again. Vividly I remember being in a school play and we had to sing this terrible song about eating too much candy and it making you sick (I was 5 years old) and when the teacher told us we would have to sing it, I flung myself down on the floor (my first and only tantrum at school ever) and cried, refusing to sing. She forced me to at least stand with the other kids and I cried through the whole performance. Pitiful, huh? No one in my family ever understood why I cried that night. It pretty much went from there, with so many of the same experiences you all have had. But when I turned about twenty I started having the mysterious n* feelings and went to doctors and my family got sick and tired of hearing me ask "Do you think I have the sf* do you think I will v*?" It is embarrassing, shaming, terrible. But now I know I'm not alone, I am SOOOO much better. In two weeks I haven't had more than an hour or so of n*. Sorry for writing so much! Thanks for reading!

Steph

[happyteacher]

Thanks guys. Kasey - I am from Toronto, Ontario, Canada.

Me too!Edited by: happyteacher

[scaredtodeath]

Happyteacher,


Wow...a fellow Torontonian! Maybe we could start a support group...lol. I actually wanted to be a teacher but the fear of classroom v***t sort of swayed me away from the profession. That is why I think I have to get over this thing...it is starting to control my life.


Amy

[happyteacher]

I live in the east end. How about you?

[scaredtodeath]

I live at Davisville and Mt. Pleasant but my in-laws live in the east (just south of Danforth off of Pape). Are you in Scarborough or East York?

[happyteacher]

Okay how weird is this: The school I teach at is south of Danforth of off Pape on Strathcona Ave.! I teach at Earl Grey Sr. P.S.


I live in Scaborough at Midland Ave. and Danforth Rd. in Scarborough.


What a small world! Where did you grow up?

[happyteacher]

By the way, I also know a great therapist who has been treating me for almost 2 years. He is located at Chruch and Charles St. if you are interested.

[scaredtodeath]

My husband's friends went to Earl Grey...I think he went to Jackman. Weird eh? I grew up around Avenue Road and Eglinton. Then my family moved to "Davisville Village" and I haven't left! It is a really nice neighbourhood. All we could afford was a condo from plan but I am glad we got our foot in the door. Where did you grow up? It is such a small world.


The farthest I've gone in Scarborough is McCowan and then I've past the rest on the way to the zoo and when we've gone out to Oshawa to visit Pete's (hubby's) co-workers. Pretty sheltered, eh?


I am actually going to a new therapist in Don Mills. I hear she is really good but I can't wait to see if she does CBT because the person who recommended her only used her for psychotherapy and family counselling. So we will see. Is your good? Have you been overcoming this problem with him? I really want to shake it. Actually, I swear that since I found this website, I have had a different perspective of this thing. It was almost like knowing other people shared this problem took away some of the anxiety. I even sat through a v***t scene on House last night (behind my hands that is, but usually I would scream "change it, change it!!!"). Maybe I will post a new topic to that effect.

[happyteacher]

I grew up in Scarborough at Pharmacy and St. Clair, only about 6 minutes from where I live now.


I do feel that my therapy is working, but it is a slow process. What doI expect? I have 24 years of avoidance behaviours to over come, of course it will take time! I have come really far with my exposure, though. I guess I should tell you that my fears lie mostly with others v*, contagiuos or not! I have moved from crying hysterically just because my therapist had a picutre in his hand (facing the other way so I couldn't see it!), to watching and listening to movies (sound is the worst for me). So, yes, I feel that I have been successful up until this point. I'm going to keep on plugging away.


I know what you mean about the kids thing, but I am ready. My husband and I suffered a miscarriage of our first pregnancy this past April and I would v* 1000 time over to be pregnant again. It has proven to be a very frustrating process. In my mind the outcome is worth the anxiety. I want kids that bad. My husband is EXTREMELY supportive and will help me when I need it anyway.


Let me know how your therapy goes!