How I tell my family and close friends ?

[MCO]

Hello people.
First at all, english isn't my first language. There's might be mistakes and sentences that make no sense. I apologize in advance.
The message will also be pretty graphic for context.

So, I am 29 years old and I will start soon therapy. My general doctor diagnosed the phobic disorder and the anorexia, and gave me a few psychiatrists numbers that I will call on monday.
The issue is that I don't drive, so I'll need to tell my family that I go to therapy, and why. I don't want to lie and find excuses anymore.
I always feared vomiting, but it became a phobia when I was 10 and my upper lip was bitten off by a dog.

The very tricky part is that the dog was family dog and I know that my aunt, my mother, my grandmother and two of my cousins still feel guilty about the incident. I don't want them to also feel guilty about the emetophobia and the anorexia.

So How can I tell them all of it without hurting them more than they already hurt ?

Also, I know they will ask how they could help me. And I don't know the answer to this question. My first instinct is to ask them coddle me about it, but I know it won't help me in the long run.

Thank you for reading,
M.

[NicManri]

For your family that will be driving you, I'd find some info on emet and print it out for them to read. For me, I'd only tell people who really need to know, in fact my bf is the only one who really knows. My family knows I don't like to v* but they don't know how problematic it is. I feel like its for me to work through and I don't need anyone else's input. I also feel like some people would just add more stress to it since its something most people don't fully understand. But if you feel like your family will be supportive then definativly tell them.

[MCO]

Thanks for your answer. I'll try to find the same kind fact sheet from emephobiahelp.org in French.
Most of them we'll be supportive, I am sure of that. I think they will be a little bit off sometimes, and not understand fully, but they'll try, and that the most important. We're also very open about mental disorders. My grandfather was a psychiatric nurse ; so I know I won't have to face stigma and judgement (which is a big relief, even if It took me years to understand that, and my family doctor had to remind me of that fact). Also, we are a very close. We talk to each other a lot. Something that is dislike with my family, it that they also about the others they worry about. They believe a little bit too much that we don't need secrets in a family.

It's never with malice, though, so I know it won't be bad, but I'd rather tell myself, with my own words. We know how it works if it's someone who tell someone else, then who tell the other. At the end of the chain, there's a lot of things that are quite different, even if they tried to be as accurate as possible. I know they are observant, too. And even if I don't know if they saw that I fear v*; they definitely saw at least the effect of the anorexia on my body, since I lost a lot of weight this past 6 months. I'd rather correct whatever conclusions they reach on their own.

And at the end of it, the constant lying, hiding, finding excuses to refuse to go to big family diner (we're 25 at this kind of party, that's way too much people for me to be comfortable and eat, even if I know and love each of them), or other events I fear, makes me feel even more anxious, I hate not being totally honest with them.

[mhartse]

http://www.emetophobiahelp.org/fact-sheet.html

I printed out that fact sheet and gave it to my family to read and understand. Cause sometimes what Im saying doesn't make since to them. That is a good laymen paper.