Disappointing news (OT)

[jesskali]

Some of you may have remembered me posting a few weeks ago regarding my infertility issues. My husband and I have been trying to get pregnant for 10 months now. I have polycystic ovarian syndrome, so we figured that I was the source of infertility. Well, the doctor wanted my husband tested also. We got the results back yesterday and they were quite abnormal. We have to repeat the test this week just to confirm things. So, this isn't good. I'm not sure what sort of fertility treatments can be done for men, but I'm sure we'll discuss the options after we get the results from the second analysis.

I also have a question about a medication that I am going to be taking for 10 days. It is called Prometrium and it is a type of progesterone. It is supposed to make me start my period since I am over 2 weeks late. I was wondering if anyone else had taken it and if there were any side effects. I have read some stuff on the internet but it just lists the usual side effects of any type of hormonal drug. My doctor did tell me it would make me drowsy and instructed me to take it before bedtime.

So, my week hasn't been off to a very good start. Both my husband and I are pretty disheartened about this, so please just remember us in your prayers!

Jess

[SimplyMe]

Aw, Jess, I'm sorry. There must be something they do when it's the male w/ infertility, you guys can'tbe the only ones. I don't knwo about the medication you are about to take so I don't know what to say there. Anyhow, good luck and you will be in my prayers!

[roxxi277]

I'm sorry to hear that. I will be in similar situation one day
when my boyfriend and I get married. He was tested, and was found
infertile. There may be a surgery he can get someday, but there
is no gaurentee. I have never heard of the medication that you
will be taking, so I can't help much there. But my thoughts are
with you. I wish you the best of luck. Please let us know
how things are going, and keep your head up.....miracles happen
everyday.
[img]smileys/smilies_01.gif[/img] Carrie

[stella9]

Dear Jesskali,



I read your post and am sorry for the diagnosis. In 1998, I wrote
a pamplet on infertility, causes, treatments and remedies to parenting
so I did a TON of research. POS comes with a host of
problems with infertility being the biggest one. With POS, its as
though your ovaries make a ton of tiny little pearl-like eggs with non
of them coming to maturation at the time of ovulation. It is that
one mature egg each month that has the potential to turn into a
pregnancy. The abonormal sperm just muddies the situation and
presents a great many more challenges.



There are so many options. I don't know your age, but that is a
factor. When I wrote the pamplet and did some seminars one of
things that I always encouraged people to do was ----- if they were
over 35 to move quickly and if they were under 35 to move
quickly. Okay so what does that mean? Unfortunately for
women, we are born with the only number of eggs we will ever
have. Each month about 400 try to come to the surface of the
ovaries with one (maybe two) making it to maturation. The others
dissolve and never have the potential to ovulate ever again. As
time moves on, women begin to have diminished ovarian reserve which
means less eggs and the eggs that are left have mutations and cell
membrane problems. This accounts for the rise in miscarriage rate
and abnormal pregnancies as women age.



Okay so you heard the bad stuff. Now for the good stuff.
Tons of women have no problems with having babies later in life.
My own sister just had her first at 40!!!

However, once you know of a problem or problems you don't want to
wait. Also keep in mind that with infertility, 40% it is the
man's problems, 40% the woman's and 20% a combination of both.



There many treatments for both you and your husband. My big
advice to you is to run, don't walk, to a reputable fertility
clinic. Don't use your gynecologist. Gynecologists
specialize in women's problems like PMS, menopause and pregnancy.
They don't know much, if anything, about infertility. Infertility
treatment is an extremely specialized field. When you are in
treatment, you must be monitored with a fine toothed comb. A
regular gynecologist will waste your time. When I taught the
course, I had so many people tell me stories of their gynecologist
wasting years of their time when they should have gone to a specialist
all along.



Again, I don't have a clue of your age and that will be a huge factor
in all of this. If you need any further information, please write.



Stella

[kate1966]

Jess, I will be keeping you and your husband in my prayers.....keep the faith and things will work out the way they are supposed to.....I hope the medication works for you also...take care...Kate

[jesskali]

Thanks everyone for the encouragement!

Stella--I'm still pretty young--I'll be 26 in August and my husband just turned 31. I would kind of like to have my first child by the time I am 30. I was diagnosed with PCOS over 5 years ago, so I knew that it would be difficult for me to get pregnant without the assistance of fertility drugs. I just had no clue that my husband would be infertile as well. After we get the results from his second analysis, I'm sure we will discuss the options that we have. Then thing is, I'm not certain if there is a fertility clinic close to our home. I imagine the closest one would be about 50 miles away which would be fine. I would think we would also need a referral from a doctor to go there--don't you think? We've also got to look into how much our insurance is going to pay, although it really doesn't matter to us--we will do whatever it takes to have a baby.

I started spotting some this morning, so I'm wondering if my period is about to begin. I certainly hope that it is so I won't have to take that medication. My body has been acting really weird lately!

Jess

[stella9]

Once you start taking fertility medications, your body will go through
a lot of different changes. You will also begin to notice every
little thing.



You are young, so you have many many options.



Stella

[jennyleigh1975]

Jess, I am sorry that you are having to go through this, I know it is hard. I have had some infertility issues myself. I agree with stella though, dont walk, run to a good infertility doctor. If you know you have these problems, then there is no point in wasting your time with a GYN. There are several different options out there, and you are still young, so that it good. I think I have read about a procedure that your husband can have done to harvest, so to speak, what they need. Know what I mean? Please keep us posted.

You will be in my thoughts and prayers!!!!

[ontariogirl]

Jess, sorry to hear about this. I know through your PMs you really wanted this to happen like now!!! You are in my prayers.

[jesskali]

Thanks again everyone. I have been reading as much as I can on male infertility and treatments. We plan to submit the second analysis tonight so hopefully by next week we will have the results. My husband is pretty bummed out over the whole thing. He feels really bad and I'm trying to be as supportive as possible. It is just crazy that we both have fertility issues.

And, my body is acting so weird. I have been having this brownish discharge, but no actual period. So, I'm a little afraid to start the Prometrium. I guess I'm going to wait another week or so to see if my period will actually start. I just don't know what is going on with me!

Jess

[swiftette]

I'm so sorryJes. [img]smileys/smilies_06.gif[/img]I don't even know what to say.

[jesskali]

UPDATE: Well, we got the results of my husband's second analysis back and it was even worse than the first. It showed no sperm whatsoever. He has an appointment with the urologist next Wednesday and they will probably do a full urological work-up. Needless to say, we are both devastated. My OB/GYN even mentioned donor sperm which really freaks me out at this point. I don't guess there is much we can do until we hear what the urologist says. I'm just wondering if he has a blocked sperm duct or something. Hopefully, whatever it is, it can be fixed. I'm terribly upset about this and I'm trying my best not to let my husband see that I am. I have secretly cried several times since talking with the doctor yesterday. I'm afraid that if I let my husband see how upset I am, it will make him feel even worse.

I have another little update. I had posted several weeks ago about anger management issues and that I had made an appointment with a counselor through our Employment Assistance Program. Well, I went last week and the session was good. We talked and I'm obviously just an anxious person who lets all of the anxiety and frustration build up and then I explode and direct it towards my husband. We discussed some coping techniques, but if that doesn't work, he suggested that I may need a "rescue medication" such as Ativan to take when I'm feeling especially anxious. I have another appointment next week to follow up. I guess I'm going to have to tell my supervisor that I have been going. I really don't want to tell her because I'm embarassed, but I know she will wonder why I'm having to get off work early so often!

Jess

[jesskali]

By the way--does anyone know of any good online infertility support groups?

[swiftette]

I'm so sorry Jess[img]smileys/smilies_16.gif[/img]. I hope the urologist will have some answers for you. They come up with new infertility break threws everyday. I'll be thinking of you. Donna

[SimplyMe]

Aw, Jess, I'm sorry too. Like swiftette said maybe the urologist will have some better news for you. W/ today's technology I'm sure there's an operation for everything. Please keep us updated! Also, I'm glad you went to the couselor, that takes a lot of courage to admit to an anger problem. Good luck to you, you guys are in my thoughts and prayers!

[aguerra29]

I'm sorry you are going through a hard time. I don't have any first hand experience, so I have no advice to offer. I believe that God plays a role in all of this and whatever is supposed to happen will happen. I know you have alot of love to give to a child. Maybe it is not in God's plan for you to give birth to a child. Maybe there is a perfect child for you and your husband out there for you to adopt. I don't mean any disrespect with my statements. I just want you to know that God is listening to your prayers, he may not answer them how you like. I think you'll be a great mother