It has been several months since I was here last and I was an avid reader on this site as well as posting a lot. I have been away and gone to therapy which has also been amazing and truly helped in where I am today.


I am 41 and I had suffered with this phobia as long as I know. I have a son who is 4 and I WILL NOT let him be like I was and so for that reason, I went to my MD who directed me to someone and without drugs, and in a short period of time I have come a long way and I want all of you to know that it can be that way for you as well. If I could help each of you the way I have been helped, I would jump into this computer and go into each home. My son deserved to have a mom who did not freak out and panic and run with every cough, cry, wake up screaming etc.I never would ever want anyone to go through what we have all lived and certainly not my child. Truth have it, our anxieties are transferred onto our children, not in a necessarily genetic form, but by the way we react and respond to situations. The same way we get glad about sunshine and rainbows and they get that response as well, they also know to freak out if we do it. I knew this was the case when my childs pediatrician told me to calm down when my son was V*ing all over the place one night from coughing and it was a constant 45 minutes of non-stop V*. I was at the Dr. the next morning with him and I was so nervous that I was shaking. The Dr. sent my son off with the nurse and sat me down alone to explain to me that I needed to get help calming down or I was going to drive my son nuts. That did it for me. I saw my Dr. the next week and went for therapy. I had never been before and I was a bit nervous at first and certainly not sure how to handle this, but I went and I learned more about this phobia in one session than anyone could imagine. It is not unlike other phobias and this man made me realize that my life has been so based upon this phobia that I have yet to live. I am 41 and that was a horrible thought. I wanted to enjoy my son's life and I love my husband dearly and I wanted to be able to do everything with a FREE feeling.


Three weeks ago, my son had a terrible SV and it lasted for 5 days. I took him to the Dr. finally and they explained that it was almost over but that something terrible had been going around and it took about 5 days to run it's course. It was heart wrenching to me to watch my son feel so awful for so long and it hit me once it was over that I had handled this with little to no fear. I did not make my husband come home, I was calm and I did not panic. I figured if I got it, I would survive it and I did not worry. I took him to the pediatrician on a Monday morning at 10:30 and I would never have gone at such a busy time with all those sick kids. I did not even think about the idea of timing or anything that would have been an enormous factor months ago. I watched a kid V* in the waiting room and while it was not at all pleasant, my son and I looked the other way and continued our conversation. Life goes on!!!!


I do not believe anyone can ever be totally cured of any phobia that takes so much of our mind space, but I did learn that if we fill our mind space with things other than this phobia, it can get better and it did. I have 3 new hobbies that I would never have done before and I do them regularly. I keep busy constantly and it is difficult to say this, but some of the time, this site can fuel the fire, so not being here has also helped.


I know this is a long post, but if I can get to where I am today considering where I was, we can all do it. It is a fear of the unknown that we all have and not knowing if or when we might be sick is not a way to go through life...it isn't living, it is existing.