I hate this. I shouldnt be crying with a headache and stress on
Christmas. I feel like someone always ruins it for me. I have so many
traditions that I love, and Christmas has always been so important to
me. It was always my mom and my sisters and me and she always managed
to spoil us even though she was on welfare. And Im the heart and soul
of Christmas for my family, and someone always takes advantage of that.
Im crying because my bf is being a jerk. Hes been scroogy all morning
and totall dampered my Christmas spirt. plus he stupid and didnt finish
shopping so he told me this morning, Christmas eve that he needs the
car for an hour. And didnt communicated what the f*** was going on. I
tell im okay, I will get ready, and then more than an hour later,
almost two I call him asking what the heck is going on, that we need to
go, and I cant pack his stuff because he isnt dressed and ready. Im so
upset. I just hate this. Its not fair. He never communicates to me, and
Im always mad about it. And now he ruins Christmas, and he knows how
important it is to me. Things like this really make me think we
shouldn't get married even if he does eventually ask me. I dont know
any more. I just hate feeling like this.



Sorry for the pity party for one, but I cant help it at the moment