Like alot of you I'm going back to school tomorrow and I am so scared about it. Its my final year where I MUST go to shcool - although I want to stay on for my alevels.It stresses me out so much. Not just becasue of the teachers and the work, but the fact that I am surrounded by so many other students. Ihate it. I'm constantly looking round to see if people feel ill and I'm so scared that I''m going to get ill in school. I've had some very close calls in the past and they were very scarry.


I hate that you are trapped - cant leave the school if you need to without explainin why and having to be picked up, cant leave the class room without 30 people asking why you had to leave etc etc. I cant take it any more. I'm always so depressed in school time. I hate it in the winter too. Colds and flu get passed around and its scarry that I know that I will get a cold from one of these people, almost certainly. I'd rather just stay at home, in my safe huose with only me and a parent in it.


Last year I only attended 45% of school. Part of that was a 3 month absense when I suffered from flu and many other colds and severe depression. It was a horrible time that seemed to last forever. But after that I only went in for afternoons.


I dont mind going into school on more ofa full time basis after the winter is over, but now I'm so scared. I dont think I can do it. I certainly cant sit in class in the winter. So I'l have to sit in these small isolation rooms for the whole winter. I dont even want to do that casue I'l have to pass people in the corridor. I'm so scared about it. Plus tomorrow even though its our first day our school is making us do lessons. Even though we dont have a clue what they are! So we wont have our books or anything. We also have a big asemberly. Ihate that I have no idea what lesson I'm going to be in tomorrow. I guess its a control issue again. I ahte this so much. Sorry I really had to vent. Expect alot more venting in the next few weeks


thanx for listening