Hello everyone. I have been managing my anxiety and emet for over 6 years now, and have seen a lot of progress. What hard (and unpleasant!) work it has been- but I thought that with my counseling sessions, my relaxation techniques and my low dose of anti-depressants, I was getting better. and then I am tested! i spent the weekend with my friends out of town. on saturday morning, my mom informed me that my sister was sick all throughout the night- which made me feel the panic wheels "turning." (do you know what i mean?) i managed to stave off a full blown attack, but worried all day. i HATE sitting there, when i am supposed to be enjoying time with my friends who i do not see that often...and instead of talking to them and laughing, i am worrying about v*ing. WHY?!!?
This morning, my friend woke up and was sick multiple times. We were drinking last night, but she seemed to have an actual stomach bug, rather than just a bad hangover. I am so upset today. I hate having the feeling that I am actually MAD at the people who were sick- after all, I know it isn't their fault! But something in my brain tells me that I am being "punished" or "tested..." it sounds crazy, I know! Does anyone else feel this way? I am hoping I can sleep tonight...but it is unlikely. my anxieties get so much worse at night. i wonder why?
hopefully reading some of your posts will help me realize i am not alone. =]
good night all.