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I joined this forum a while back. I started seeing a psychiatrist and also a psychotherapist. I was put on 40mg of Paxil and I am supposed to be on 1mg xanax 4 times a day. That is A LOT of xanax and it knocks me out. The Paxil started to help my anxiety but it had a lot of sexual side effects. I wasn’t in the mood or couldn’t finish when I actually was in the mood. So I stopped taking it. I still took my xanax when I felt panicky.
I have always had my fear. But it would usually go away once the bout of the flu got through my family. Last year I was pregnant when it hit my family again. Once again (as usual) it didn’t hit me but got everyone else. Ever since this happened I haven’t been able to let go of the anxiety. It is on a regular basis. Always on my mind… always fear it will happen. Every time my daughters tell me they have a belly ache – there it comes --- severe panic.

Well last night I was picking up the girls – Lillie (8) and Elizabeth (6) from tumbling. Elizabeth had told me she sat out because her belly hurt. As we were walking out – it happened. Then again in the washroom. My 8 year old started crying because it scared her too. Then my husband said he wasn’t feeling well. He had a 102 fever. More panic. I quarantined them to the basement. Gave them both Zofran which I carry with me. I took 1 ½ xanax. After a little while I felt all loopy from the meds. I fell asleep. Woke up this morning and everyone seems better.

WHY cant I get through this? I lost my health insurance so I cant continue to go to the doc. I pay for my meds out of pocket. My whole world collapses when someone is sick. I dread it. Now their tumbling class every Tuesday is going to cause a panic attack. I feel like I have post traumatic stress syndrome. I hate it.

Do you all have this as extreme as me?


Really starting to panic some more... I am almost off work and have to go home and be around my daughter. Praying noone wakes up tonight sick... I probably wont sleep. I hate this.