Hi Everyone,
I'm new here, and I just wanted to share an experience I had...but where oh where do I begin???
Ok. I have emetophobia. I came to this realization several years ago, when i finally accepted the fact that the act of vomiting (either by myself or another) caused such extreme fear and anxiety that i would tremble uncontrollably was not normal. having to watch tv with my finger on the remote control mute button or programming it to go to a "safe" tv station was not normal. watching movies in theater with my hands over my ears was not normal. and so on.
In 2006, i became pregnant, but i miscarried at 7 weeks. i had no morning sickness.
in 2009, i became pregnant again, this time with all day sickness. i wretched and dry heaved all day. i lost 12 lbs. i was diagnosed with mild hyperemesis gravidarum, and it was easily managed with powerful anti-emetics, but that pregnancy unfortunately ended at 3 months. my husband and i were devastated. genetic tests revealed later that we were going to have a boy.
in 2011, i became pregnant for the third time, however, my hyperemesis graduated from mild to severe. again, i heaved and wreched all day. i lost over 20 lbs. my life and the life of my baby were in danger, so i, my husband and my doctors all agreed that i needed to have a naso-gastric tube placed. basically, a feeding tube is placed in my nose, down my throat and into my stomach. however my nausea was so severe, that the tube had to bypass my stomach and go into my small intestine. through that tube, i received liquid nutrition. i had it in for a total of 5 weeks. in those 5 weeks, i still had severe nausea, and was vomiting stomach acid daily. my throat became damaged from the acid, and i was unable to talk for about two weeks. my tube also became clogged and i had to have the old ones removed and replaced three times in the er. i was in the hospital for about one month. at 17 weeks pregnant, my nausea started to resolve, and i was able to eat again. i regained the 20 lbs i lost, plus 10!
i am sitting here today, typing this while holding my 10 week old baby girl. she is beautiful!!!
a couple of doctors told me that i could terminate my pregnancy...but that was not ever an option. no matter what, i was going to have my baby.

i am sharing this because i want everyone to know that yes, you can have emetophobia, but it does not have you. i still have emetophobia, my baby spits up, she even vomited a couple times which left me slightly shaken. we recently gave her the rotavirus vaccine, because it is live (weakend) virus, it can shed in her feces, so now i am going crazy with worry...but i am coping.

in short, my emetophobia does not rule me, and i does not have to rule you. you can have emetophobia, and live a rich, full, happy life.

through my experience, i can tell that i am on the road to living fear free, but i know it will be a very long, tough road, with a few set backs, nevertheless, i AM on that road with my eyes on the prize.

keep YOUR eyes on the prize.

love,
makeeba