I looked over at my son sitting on the couch and he had THAT look. I told him to run for the trash can and he just SAT THERE. I involuntarily started screaming at him and even cussed at him. I very rarely ever swear and I have NEVER once in his life sworn at him...but when panic set in it just came out. I hate myself for that and for lecturing and yelling at him afterward, but my brain is not functioning correctly at the moment and nothing I'm saying is right. I'm shaking. Seriously panicking right now. Luckily my husband is home and was able to clean up. But he's not being at all nice to me and is lecturing me about getting on to my son.

I couldn't help it. When I saw him with the look of knowing what was going to happen on his face and he didn't do anything I got angry, it was all I could think. He's 6, he should recognize the feeling and know where to go and he didn't. Even when I told him what to do he just sat there. I guess somewhere in my head I know that it's not fair, he was scared and just couldn't think...but my panic more is overriding that and I can't be anything but angry.

And I can't bring myself to go back inside the house. He's still there...and I'm worried my daughter might have it too. I won't be able to go in my living room or use my couch for awhile now....even though it's been cleaned and it's gone, it's almost like my brain still sees it and anything my son was around at the moment it happened is now tainted. I cant handle this anymore. Help me!