Hi guys! I'm very active here in the forum, I read a lot of posts and I've realized that most emets seem to remember what it's like to v*. At least on here, the majority can at least talk about the real n* symptoms and so on from experience instead of facts. I'm 19, and I haven't v*d since I was a child. I don't even know when the last time was. I remember the last time I was really about to v*, I had been out in the sun for too long and started feeling really sick. I woke up in the middle of the night thinking I was going to v* but it went away and after that I was fine. But I can not for the life of me even recall what that was like. I don't even know what I'm afraid of you know? I obsess daily over something I don't even know is scary or not. I might not fear it at all once it happens, and this whole thing is just my brain getting stuck in a thinking pattern.
Are there any emets out there who have v*d without remembering what is was like prior to it happening? Did it make your phobia worse knowing what it was like? Please tell me! I've kind of come to the breaking point with this phobia and I almost (very quietly... Haha) hope that I will just v* so that if im going to have this phobia, at least I know what it is I'm afraid of!