Need a reason?....

[Galadriel]

Lots of times when I feel nauseas, or feel like my intestines are acting up, I notice if I cannot figure out the reason why its happening, it just freaks me out and I feel like obsessed with figuring out why it happened. If I know the reason (say like my period, or even if it was an sv), then I feel like I take it a lot easier, and especially say if its directly due to my period I am able to handle it a lot better. Why is this? Maybe I also have this deep seated fear that something is really wrong if I can't figure out the reason why. Anyone else like this?

[rainy]

I've thought about this situation a lot. Why do we need a reason
for feeling bad? Is it because we are avoiding thinking about
what's really bothering us in our lives? I know when I was a kid
and was emet, I worried about getting sick a lot because I had no
control over my life. I never knew what would happen next with abusive
parents, but if I could just figure out a reason why I was feeling bad,
I would be in control of that situation. It's called
"displacement anxiety." Maybe in times of stress we go back to
coping techniques that worked when we were kids, but we need to
remember we are adults now and have better ways of working things
out. Does that make any sense?

[Galadriel]

Hey Rainy,
Yeah I'm quite sure a lot of my issues are control related because most likely I felt I didn't have any growing up, and thus having a reason for why allows you to feel like you have some form of control over the situacion. Instead of it just being some abstract not feeling good and not knowing the cause, knowing the why (like say for instance sick feeling due to period) allows you to have some grasp on the situacion and thus not feel so out of control. Wow I didn't connect that before. So that very well could be the why!

Edited by: Galadriel

[marieb73]

Oh I definitely hunt for a reason. And you are right, it helps to manage the n* if I know what could be causing it. Probably because then I wager how bad and how long it will last.

[daffodil]

^^ Same here, Marie. I do this for stuff that is not even stomach related, as well. I need to know why I am feeling a certain way. I think it is a control issue, for me at least.

[michelle01]

i am the same i always feel better when i find a reason why it could be happening esp if its my periods. i dunno why maybe its because we feel we have more control over it if we know what it is?


michelle xxx

[kristin1980]

man i cant BELIEVE how much i over think EVERYTHING when it comes to v** or sv* or tummy troubles period.. even if others have it. I have to ask lots of questions so i can determine what it is and why.. and if its contagious and blah blah.. blah.. its really tiring isnt it??

[1scareddj]

OMG I know EXACTLY what you mean. My mom is my rock and when I feel n* she says things to me like "You're not sick. If you were going to v*, you would have by now!" That makes me feel better (somewhat) because I know she's right. LOL.


But to answer your question...YES I am always searching for a reason to why I feel the way I do. If I have a headache or my jaw hurts, I think that maybe I am stressed about something which is usually the case. When I feel n* (which is like EVERYDAY by the way) I try and remember everything I ate that day and if I were to v*, how much it would be and what it may look like if I do (not that I would look at it anyway, but you know what I mean) and I think, "did I cook my food all the way through?" or is it time for me to get my period (which usually is accompanied but d*) and stuff like that.


I am ALWAYS looking for a REASON or a possible answer to why I feel certain aches and pains tummy related or not.


So don't worry! You're not the only one!!Edited by: 1scareddj

[kimmyc24]

Yep me too!


Whatever it is thats wrong (usually stomach issue though), I immediately start analyzing it and then as soon as i've realised thats it gas or cos I drank normal milk (i'm lactose intolerant) etc, I seem to stop panicking almost straight away.


I also don't worry too much about fallingpregnant because I know that if I am sick that its down to morning sickness, and nothing else. I am fine about others being sick too, ifI know that itssomething thats unique to them and not contagious - eg drunk, reaction to medication etc. I still don't like to see them or esp. HEAR them, but I don't panic AS much.


Does anyone else also ALWAYS fear the worst case scenario? Eg if your jaw aches, its lock jaw? Or if your armpit hurts, its breast cancer? Or is that just me?

[1scareddj]

Does anyone else also ALWAYS fear the worst case scenario? Eg if your jaw aches, its lock jaw? Or if your armpit hurts, its breast cancer? Or is that just me?

YES!!! Somtimes I think that if I have a stiff neck it's menangitis or something, or If I have a pain in my right side appendicitis.


I also have an intense fear of passing out or fainting...that has happened 3 times in my life so if I start to feel a little dizzy I panic.....


anyone else like this?

[kate1966]

Amen!!!!!

[nikkii]

Do any of you have kids? I have the same exact fear of v* but try to have both kids with it and then wonder if you will get it too I have the worst panic attacks b cuz of it I won't eat, for seven days to make sure i won't have it and i can't get that med you guys can over there to help make me not get sick and I Lysol my whole house and my husband hates lysol and I clean with the stuff i use it on my mirrors ect SERIOUSLY It is constant and now school started i really freak?

[hippychick]

Galadriel I keep meaning to reply to your posts because I could have wrote a lot of them myself. Especially the IBS related ones, like how if I get scared my IBS will act up and wont be near a bathroom then it gives me a stomach ache, and I'm always scanning for the nearest usable bathroom. It's horrible. Anyway on topic yes I do this too. I'll spend days panicking b/c I feel sick but as soon as I know it's PMT I relax and I can control the nausea better. If I feel sick/hot/tired or anxious for no reason then i get very scared. Soon as I have a reason then I'm cool!

Oh and my emet is a definate control thing, as is my fear of not getting to the toilet. My life was out of control growing up and anytime I feel it is out of control again I start trying to control my body and freaking out about emet.

Edited by: hippychick

[Galadriel]

Galadriel I keep meaning to reply to your posts because I could have wrote a lot of them myself. Especially the IBS related ones, like how if I get scared my IBS will act up and wont be near a bathroom then it gives me a stomach ache, and I'm always scanning for the nearest usable bathroom. It's horrible. Anyway on topic yes I do this too. I'll spend days panicking b/c I feel sick but as soon as I know it's PMT I relax and I can control the nausea better. If I feel sick/hot/tired or anxious for no reason then i get very scared. Soon as I have a reason then I'm cool!

Oh and my emet is a definate control thing, as is my fear of not getting to the toilet. My life was out of control growing up and anytime I feel it is out of control again I start trying to control my body and freaking out about emet.

Hey there
Urgh yeah all my IBS posts while I was away, I feel bad sometimes complaining about it but it freaks me out sometimes especially being away from home (Im back now tho). But yea I'm on my period now and it is easier to handle the nausea and stuff knowing its due to that. Its when I'm nowhere near that time of the month that it gets to me more! Its almost like we've taken the control thing and turned it inward on ourselves (others project it out on other people and be all bossy and stuff).