Seeing others v*

[breezie]

This is kinda for the people who have a problem seeing others v*


When I was freaking out about seeing a movie with v* in it, my mom told me to think about this....


- It can't hurt you. 90% of the time the v* won't be near you and it may gross you out but it's not gonna change your life.


- When somebody v*...it's a good thing because it's their body helping them get rid of something that is not right. It may be scary, but it's the best thing for the other person.


- (Istill needhelp with this 1) Pity the person who just v*. Kinda like the second point. Their body is doing it for them and it's a part of life so try not to feel angered towards the person if they didn't make it to the bathroom, somehting is wrong and they can't help it.





I thought they were decent tips. They make a whole lotta sense but I haven't been able to apply them yet (thank goodness)[img]smileys/smilies_02.gif[/img]

[christianne]

Hi there!!

Those really do make sense.....I really never thought of it that way. However, for some reason I have a hard time feeling sorry for someone who has just v*ed (except for my son!!!). I actually feel something like anger towards them, as awful as that sounds. Especially if it's someone older and capable of doing it somewhere "acceptable". I know sometimes people just simply cannot make it to the bathroom and so forth, but it still ticks me off!!! Irrational and selfish, I know!![img]smileys/smilies_02.gif[/img]

[breezie]

Yes I know exactly what you mean. It's like, "You're old enough to know when it's coming, why would yo do that?"


Yeah it is selfish but it's just our way of looking out for ourselves....


I understand about your son too...I felt bad for my mom when she was sick but I was avoiding her like the plague and I felt horrible about it.


It must be different with a child tho..that's pretty much your everything.

[sage]

Hi Breezie,


Don't beat yourself up if this logic your mom put forward doesn't help your phobia much...the part of your brain responsible for the fear is more powerful than the logic centre (otherwise we wouldn't be phobic in the first place, cuz we're all smart people.) Interesting that you said "thank goodness" you haven't been able to apply these principles. That's kind of a strange statement....but I just bet I get you. Let me know if I'm wrong. Your thinking is: if I apply these principles, I'll see someone vomit....and I want to avoid that at all costs.


If I'm right then....that's the phobia talking, not you. If you can set your goals towardbeing successfully treated for the phobia, you'll be glad to hear any tips that would help you get better.


Anyway, maybe I'm way off....lol! Let me know!

[breezie]

Your thinking is: if I apply these principles, I'll see someone vomit....and I want to avoid that at all costs.


If I'm right then....that's the phobia talking, not you.


Anyway, maybe I'm way off....lol! Let me know!

You could not be more right!! LOL I know what I need to do but it's the whole facing it that I don't want any parts of. Arrghh!! One of these days!! [img]smileys/smilies_12.gif[/img]

[sage]

"facing it" need not be as scary as you imagine. It would be wrong for any therapist to expect you to "face" anything that frightens you more than just a tiny bit. Too much "facing it" and you will be re-traumatized, and this is what you imagine as the only option. Instead, gradually exposing yourself, little by little, to very mild things where your anxiety level only goes as high as 3 or 4 out of 10 is the key. We would start with just looking at the v-word, for instance. Then move on to a stick-man with a line coming out his mouth. Anyway, you get the idea. The treatment should NOT be scary - that's just counter-productive.


Good luck!

[breezie]

I was looking through the Screen-It website in the Gore section and some of the descriptions were upsetting my tummy a little bit but I did it. I think that's a good way to start like you said.


Do you mind if I ask where you are in this whole process?

[sage]

Me? I'm completely cured of this phobia...and I'm the one who set up the exposure site for others and wrote a lot of the articles and info in this section. And believe me, if I can do it, so can you!

[breezie]

Just read the article....So THAT is what you were talking about! Lol i really have got to explore the site more. That's intresting. My fear is seeing somebody get sick (movies, tv or real life) and that's what you went though too.


The whole picture/movie exposure thing seems like it could work once you get past the "I'll die if I see it" phase.





How did you react the first time you saw graphic material during your therapy?

[sage]

It doesn't work that way. The first time is the same as the last time if your therapist does their job right. You don't see graphic material - you see the simplest, easiest thing of all. Just a stick-man with a line coming out his mouth. You learn to become completely and utterly calm with it until you have ZERO anxiety. And then you move up to something EVER SO SLIGHTLY scarier than that. Once again, your anxiety level should not go above 5 out of 10 at any time during treatment. So by the time you get to graphic stuff, you still react the same way you did when you saw the stick man...a VERY SLIGHT reaction higher than the level before. That's how it works best.


By the time I got to videos, I did feel a "jolt" sometimes when it first happened, but then the anxiety level went down right away.