No, I'm not married. I had a long-term boyfriend that I'm just now over so, who knows?

I've been emet ever since I was about four! I don't know what triggered it, but that year my oldest brother was shot and I saw him in the ambulance (I don't know what that has to do with v* so I'm still trying to figure that out). He survived, but as a result developed a very bad stomach ulcer and was sick all the time, but I don't remember ever seeing or hearing him v*. Could that be it? Around that time, maybe a year later, I came down with a sv* and I don't remember it very well but I remember afterward I was terrified of v* again. Vividly I remember being in a school play and we had to sing this terrible song about eating too much candy and it making you sick (I was 5 years old) and when the teacher told us we would have to sing it, I flung myself down on the floor (my first and only tantrum at school ever) and cried, refusing to sing. She forced me to at least stand with the other kids and I cried through the whole performance. Pitiful, huh? No one in my family ever understood why I cried that night. It pretty much went from there, with so many of the same experiences you all have had. But when I turned about twenty I started having the mysterious n* feelings and went to doctors and my family got sick and tired of hearing me ask "Do you think I have the sf* do you think I will v*?" It is embarrassing, shaming, terrible. But now I know I'm not alone, I am SOOOO much better. In two weeks I haven't had more than an hour or so of n*. Sorry for writing so much! Thanks for reading!

Steph