SOOO SCARED,and ashamed.

[harttride]

I'm not used to "venting" , but here goes.. so i'm really really, scared right now.Today was one of those really bad, low days for me. I was about to eat dinner, at around 10pm , and i usually dont eat that late. Only reason was because i woke up at about 1:30 this afternoon, and ended up eating a late lunch. I finished it about 4 pm and since i dont like to mix foods ,and i wait 6+ hours , i had to wait.So like i said ,i was getting ready for dinner around 9:30pm, and i wanted something light to eat. I thought that i should just eat a grilled cheese sandwich, when my original plan was to eat some frozen chicken nuggets.So i started preparing my food. Grabbed a fork to pick out the bread from the bag, and put the bread on my plate. There was a piece of bread the was dangling, so i grabbed it and ate it. I closed the bag put it away.Then went back over to the plate with the bread to put down my fork, and i froze. There was something wrong with the bread.I couldnt believe my eyes!!!! There was a spot of green mold on the bread crust!! [img]smileys/smilies_03.gif[/img]I started panicking, crying aand everything,as you all know."I ate moldy bread!!"was what was going through my head over and over. My little sister was luckily with me, and managed to help me calm down a bit. Then i remembered.. that yesterday i had eaten that bread.. and chills went through out my body. I started to freak out all over again. "why, why did i have to go and change my mind??". I relaxed and again , i started to think again, had another panic attack.I ended up having to eat,even though i refused at first, because i know if i go and starve myself, even though im scared as heck, i 'm gonna start feeling hungry and that may turn into n* and then i'll panick again.I dont want to get sick of course. So right now it's 1 am, and im just waiting to digest this food which takes me 6 hrs. to do,so im ending up not sleeping at all and going to bed till 6 am ,the earliest ,and waiting and hoping that i dont get sick.I have till thursday or friday to see if i'm sick because it takes 12-72 hrs for the virus to take effect. My sister tells me that the way that i am checking every little thing i eat , that it's unlikely that i ate any piece of moldy bread. But what if i didnt check well enough? And if it was in the same bag as the mold bread , cant the bacteria spread??It's sad enough that i cant deal with this on my own ,but my little 11 yr. old sister has to help me?I feel so ashamed that she has to help me,and what made the sitution worse is that she told me that the last time she almost got sick, she started to feel afraid of t*ing u*.NOOOOOOOOOOOO!!! Not her too?? But i know it's my fault if it happens to her too.. i dont know how i could live with myself if she became emetophobic too. And my mother?? She'd probably would have hate towards me.. so i'm praying for two things, that i dont get sick and that my sister doesnt end up like me.Does anyone know what i should do?? I'm in such a pickle.. i really dont want to get sick, but now i have to worry about my little sister. I'm ruining not only my own .. but her life too. I should have never have gotten her involved with my fear, i should have never told her or my mother what was wrong with me. I just feel like i want to leave them, so they dont have to worry about me anymore,so they can worry about themselves.Do you guys think i'll get sick.. do you think my sisters gonna turn like me?? I dont know what to do anymore.And now my tummy is starting to hurt a bit,adding more to my anxiety.Sorry for the long post by the way.Edited by: harttride

[prncesspnk]

i promise you... you will absolutely NOT get sick from moldy bread. try
and relax knowing it CANNOT make you ill.

i also want to add, when i was younger, i used to "have to" eat every 3
hours and i "couldn't" eat at certain times, and i couldn't "mix" foods
either, just like you. it's important to listen to your body, not your mind,
when it comes to food and eating. i've learned that i feel best if i just
eat when i'm hungry. i don't eat three set meals a day. i graze on things
like toast and crackers throughout the day, and it really helps my
tummy, which then helps ease my mind.

[sootywillow]

As Lauren says, don't worry! Moldy bread will not make you sick. Hope you
manage to calm down and feel better soon.

[x hannah x]

I eat cheese with mould on it all the time. You know, the kind thats meant to be green. And I'm fine Its penicillin, its good for you even.

[wackydeli]

My mother's the type of person where if something has a spot of mold on it, she'll just pick off that spot and eat the rest. She's done it with cheeses, bread, jams, etc.

I once finished a whole container of spoiled cottage cheese (my nose was stuffy so I couldn't smell or taste that it was spoiled) and the most I got was a bit of a stomach ache and very little d*.

I'm sure if you just had a little bit you'll be fine. The worrying will most likely give you more n* than the mold might.

[centipede]

I agree with the others in that moldy bread will not make you sick.

Try to relax by doing some deep breathing. Breathe in and out slowly.

Also, don't be ashamed for how you reacted. It is common for us emets to react like that. All of us can relate and have had similar experiences.

[harttride]

well thanks everyone!! i had no idea you couldnt get sick from it... believe it or not no one ever told me that before.My mother and sister told me i'd be fine , but it's hard to believe them 'cause they think that nothing will make you sick , only if you believe it will. They've been so wrong before though...lol. Thanks a bunch !! [img]smileys/smilies_04.gif[/img]

[twilightrose]

I wouldn't eat moldy bread, but the worrying will make you feel s*.Edited by: twilightrose

[mxw08]

Once I was rinsing with mouthwash and I swallowed just a little bit and stayed up most of the night freaked that I would get sick.

Experiences like that tend to make me feel pathetic... because they're generally nothing to worry about. But they definitely happen!

Glad you feel better

[harttride]

Yeah, i agree with both of you.

twlightrose, i think thats probably why i felt s*.I was always taught that eating moldy bread would make you s*. I was told a lot of things that would make you s* while i was growing up and i think thats why i have alot of the habits that i do to prevent from getting s*.

mxw08, that happened t me too! I litterally could not stop thinking about it, and even starting crying a bit , thinking i'd be sick, until i fell asleep .

I actually feel ok, but now my tummy is bothering from some unknown reason.It hurt yesterday morning, late afternoon,last night, this morning and a few mins. ago. They are usually stronger pains,then n* hits me for a few mins.( must be panick) so i dont know. It couldnt be from the bread since the 72 hr. period is already over. Not knowing is freaking out a bit. [img]smileys/smilies_11.gif[/img]

[mxw08]

Yikes! I know how you feel... I was diagnosed with polycystic ovarian syndrome three months ago and it's been a long journey of absolute hormone whackness, and I've felt nauseated almost every day for three months. Probably why I've been posting on here more than EVER before because it's basically facing my worst fear everyday. I thought I'd made progress... but I guess not!

I doubt you have a bug or anything, panic makes everything way worse.

[teh folder]

Food poisoning is caused by various bacterial organisms. Mold is not a bacteria and will not cause food poisoning. Mold can cause illness, especially if the person is allergic to molds. Try not to eat mold, but if you do remember, most likely it will not make you s***.
Edited by: teh folder