feeling ugly. (offtopic!)

[crazybeautiful]

So some days I wake up and feel so ugly, I don't even want to go out. I know this is a problem, and I'm planning on disscussing it with my therapist. But I can't help how I feel. No matter whatI do with my hair, or makeup (I fee like I need to wear makeup) I always just feel so ugly and plain.


I've been told I'm beautiful, yet I can't accept it. I just want to know if anyone else feels like this.

[Galadriel]

Hey there!


Sometimes I think its a womans curse to feel ugly and down on herself, even when the whole world could tell her she is really beautiful and great. I know I feel like that sometimes, and even when my bf is like "your beautiful" I still dont feel like I am. Its hard to get over this feeling. All I can say is that your not alone and that I too struggle with this some.

[crazybeautiful]

Yeah, I just find it hard to believe. You know? I try to make myself appear good on the outside, but it won't do anything unless I feel it on this inside. I can always find something wrong with myself.

[izzybee]

I feel like this quite regularly but I think that its quite a common problem, especially amongst women. I hate the way I look some of the time and really dont want to show myself to the world! Its good that you are going to talk to someone about this because I'm sure that it will help. Please dont feel to bad, even thpough its hard at times.

[kmarie]

Oh yes.you are not alone. I have many mornings when i wakeup and dont even want to get out of bed because i know no matter what i do im not going to feel comfortable with myself.


I have never really liked the way i look..though things have gotten better now that i have long (down to my lower back!!) hair..i feel much more femine.


My biggest issue are my breasts. My husband says theya re peferct (b cups) and i guess they are ok...but id would LOVE slightly bigger and much perkier breasts. I have often thought about surgery to help with this but just cant justify it. plus no one around here would ever understand why i would want to do it. I wouldnt do it for others to oggle..i would want to do it so when i look in the mirror i love what i see instead of wanting to cry.


I have days when i wake up and feel beautiful and sexy...and other days when i wake up and litteraly cry in front of the mirror.


I think its a curse for us women to not be happy with our looks/body!


I agree though..if you have therapist i would certainly talk with them..perhaps he/she can help you with your self image!

[mparker5]

Like lots of people have already said, I think that a lot of people have this problem, and they can help it by doing something special, like putting on makeup or doing some kind of skin treatment or something.


But it sounds like maybe your symptoms are a touch more severe than that, so I'd definitely share this with your therapist if you think that would help.


I know what you mean though - some people tell me I'm attractive (Right now I'm very proud of the fact that I finally put pictures up on the photo album here - go see!!! [img]smileys/smilies_04.gif[/img]). Some days I think they're right, and other days I think, "Ugh, what are they talking about?" I think that's normal. Although, if you constantly feel ugly and plain, then you probably have a distorted perception, because I'm sure you're not! Good luck - I hope you feel better about yourself soon.

[crazybeautiful]

Thanks for the kind words everyone!


Mparker - your pictures aren't there!! I can't see them!

[mparker5]

Oops, silly me - they're there now, on page 9. I put them in my own photo album, but not the main one.

[chibi]

I feel that way a lot of the time, too. But not nearly as bad as my
boyfriend. He rarely does this but sometimes he goes into a completely
depressed state and cannot do ANYTHING because he thinks hes so ugly.
(I think he is the HOTTEST guy Ive EVER seen, so hes just nuts!) but
unfortunately sometimes its my fault. If Im feeling anxious a lot, I
tend to shy away from him and dont give any affection, and thats when
he starts feeling unwanted. Stupid, stupid phobia.

Anyway, I think most people that arent self-obsessed feel this way once
in awhile. Sometimes I cant even look other people in the face because
I feel so ugly. I dont know that I have any advice to give, but I
hope you feel better soon.

[Misha]

Hi I used to feel like I was uglyandthere wasn't a day that I would allow anyone to see me without makeup and my hair done. I don't know if marriage made me more comfortable or I've finally accepted myself just as I am physically, but it's not a concern anymore. I've seen your picture and you are beautiful, but you need to feel it INSIDE too. When you love yourself, even with all your flaws, you aren't as critical of how you look.


I know it sounds silly, but affirmations really do help. Tell yourself all the time that you are a good, special person who is pretty and deserves good things. It sounds simple, but I know it's not. We are always feeling stupid, silly, pathetic, etc. over our fears and phobia. Try to listen to the negative things you are telling yourself and stop! Turn all that around to only good things. It's amazing how it can lift your mood to stop that negative ramble that shatters self esteem.


Anyway, hope this helps! You are definitly not alone with this one. When I have a day where I don't feel my best, I can tend to be irritable, snappy and not go out so I totally hear what you are saying. Try not to look to outside sources to tell you/prove that you are pretty. Learn to know it inside


Write soon!
xxoxoxoxox


Misha

[mparker5]

That seems like really good advice, Misha! [img]smileys/smilies_01.gif[/img]

[Babydoll]

just a thought.





somewhere, someone is wishing for something you had. bigger busted women wishing for smaller breasts. skinny girls wishing for the j.lo butt. blondes wishing to be brunettes and to be taken more seriously, brunettes wanting to be blonde to be more carefree. tall girls wanting to be petite and femine. short girls wishing for long legs.


be thankful for what you have!

[Jenneh]

i actualluy think, WHATEVER you look like, your gnna doubt ur looks somehow! which is kinda sad, because whatever happened to "your unique and beautiful in your own way?"


i know, im a hypocrit, i think im BUTT ugly!!


Jen xxx

[sarahx]

I doubt ur butt ugly jen lol


I think every woman on this earth has felt this before at least once in their lives its just normal.


Sometimes i think id love a bit of plastic surgery to make things a little less saggy (thankyou daughter) but i wouldnt want to change myself into something different. I used to cut my legs because i thought they were fat and horrible, and although i still think they are fat i dont do any cutting anymore because what did that help?


Im sure you are all wonderfully good looking people!


Sarah xxx

[Eternity]

Someone once said to me, 'just remember, someone will always think youre purdy'. They will too. The more I look at my friends' relationships, the more I see no logic or reason in why people consider each other attractive. Beauty really is in the eye of the beholder, but if you yourself dont think youre purdy, youll see it far less, because if youre not confident, people wont notice you as much.

[nat10]

i feel exactly the same. especially at the moment i have put on a bit of weight altough im no where near as heavy as i used to be i just feel so fat and ugly that i just want to stay in bed! i hate it so much! it seems the more i diet lately the fatter i get! think i need to change my pill!
just really gets me down cos after i had my son i was so full of confidence cos i had lost so much weight and now im starting to feel so down again, the trouble is i lose loads weight when emet is bad and when feeling fine i just eat things normaly and get fat! when im feeling fat i would rather have bad emet and when have bad emat would rather be fat!
people have told me i could be a model and i have been with different agencies but i just dont have the confidence to do any jobs im offered!
i really do hate myself at the moment.

[nat10]

p.s i have seen your picture on the link that they give crazybeautiful and you really are beautiful so you should not ever think that you are not, i would be full of confidence if i looked like you! xxxx

[Melikasa]

I was checking out all the photos and I think you guys are soo lucky. You are young, beautiful, slim and everything that I'm not.
Be proud though you are all incredible on the inside and the outside.

[Callum]

I've had a look at the photos too. Would it be inappropriate for me to say there's some serious talent among you all?


Just had an idea.....


Miss Emetophobia.


The perfect way to raise the profile ofour phobia!

[crazybeautiful]

Melissa!!! Don't say that. You are beautiful, actually you and Michele are the two people on here that I can count on to calm me down the most. I look forward to hearing what you have to say!!! Don't be so down on yourself ( HEY i should be talking eh!!) you are beautiful inside as well as out!!!!!!!!


Nat, thanks so much. Means alot to me. <3 I've looked into modeling, but I'm way too damn short for it! 5'3'' doesn't cut it. You are very pretty as well.


Also, I don't want yall to think I was just coming here looking for compliments, if you know me at all, you know I'm not that kind of person.


Callum, LOL, that's a funny idea!!

[Melikasa]

oh I don't think ANYONE thought that. I just hope that if it is all pounded into your head enough. Compliments coming left and right that some might land and you will start to believe it.

[NCsmile6]

I often feel ugly and unpretty too. I do think it is a woman's curse to feel that way. Somedays I feel that the world would be better off if I just wore a paper bag over myhead or something. So, I can completely relate. I would also like to add that for me, being told by someone else that you are beautiful and actually feeling it and belieiving it yourself are too very different things. I have felt beautiful very few times in my life, and it's an amazing feeling, very different than being told you are beautiful. Like Misha said, "Learn toknow it inside!!!" That's very important and very hard at the same time! You are not alone in this Michelle, I hope you see that.


On a side note, when I feel unpretty or ugly, I like to listen to three particular songs: (below them I have included the links to the lyrics!) Hope that helps!


1) Beautiful by Christina Aguilera (of course.)


http://display.lyrics.astraweb.com:2...y.cgi?christin a_aguilera%2E%2Estripped%2E%2Ebeautiful


2) Unpretty by TLC


http://display.lyrics.astraweb.com:2...y.cgi?tlc..fan mail..unpretty


3) Video by India Arie


http://display.lyrics.astraweb.com:2...y.cgi?india_ar ie..acoustic_soul..video

[Melikasa]

I love that song my Christina. It is inspirational. My husband thinks I am beatiful so I guess that is all that matters. MY BIG problem is that I am afraid one day he will wake up and realize what he married and go EEEEEK>

[crazybeautiful]

Don't say that!!! He married you for a reason (well I'm sure more than one!!) he won't do that.