Hi and welcome It's really nice feeling when you know you aren't alone, isn't it? I'm sorry to hear that this fear has stopped you from singing. Do you take meds for your panic disorder? A lot of people on these forums take anti-anxiety medication and find it helps a lot. As for a cure - I'm not really sure. Some people have found relief by using hypnotherapy, though I'm not exactly sure how it works. Basically we need to find the root of our fear - and yours seems to be from seeing your father get sick so often, that would definately be frightening for a child to see/hear. Do you have any children? A lot of people here have kids and it can sometimes lessen the fear; ie. seeing that throwing up is a normal event - and kids usually aren't scared to be sick! Also, I don't think you need to get sick to cure this fear - that doesn't make sense! Do you go to a lot of effort to prevent yourself getting sick?