Help

[SarahV]

So ive never done this before its all new to me so please bare with me. Im 24 years old. Have had a bf for over a year and he has a 2 year old. I take care of the child while he works. I have a huge fear of him getting sick (vomiting). Ive had this fear since i was a child but in the last month its became horrible. I seen my Dr. was perscribed anxiety medicine and one session of counceling. The meds are helping alot but the fear is so real still that its making me not want to be around him. I have a hard time holding him even. Makes me feel horrible. Im alone with him right now hes asleep for his nap of the day and alls i can think about is him vomiting. It controls my thoughts and actions, I dont know what else to do, Please someone respond and give me some advice.

Note- meds are seroquel and pristiq

[NaiveAndTrue]

I worked w/ little ones for YEARS. (Daycare in a 2's room, then 4's, and even infants. Plus I nannied every age from newborn to 14.) It freaked me out the first few times, but after a few months you'll calm down. Once you 'connect' w/ a kid and they're not feeling well, you'll be surprised how easily those instincts kick in, and you just want to help them feel better.

Just stay calm! About 99.9% of anything that can make him V* isn't going to be something you can catch. Either something will irritate his tummy and come up, or he'll catch something you're old enough to be immune to. It sounds like he's not in daycare, so he probably won't be exposed to much. If he get's sick, it's most likely to be a 'wet burp', or from bouncing around too much after eating.

Little kid V* isn't the same as grown up V* most of the time. He's passed the spit-up stage. Just don't force him to eat if he doesn't seem as though he has an appetite.

[sammykat]

Sarah,

I don't have a good solution but wanted to say you are not alone...I don't have kids but have nieces and a nephew I love dearly but I am too stressed when they are at my house or in my car. It drives me crazy but I just worry and worry just like you. I think our minds play tricks on us...it happens rarely, and like someone above just said, most of the time its not something we would catch anyway. I try to reason with mysef and make myself think about what is the worst that will happen? Once you get through it its over and its not the end of the world. I try to look at it with reason. Helps a tiny bit.

Good luck!

[SarahV]

Thank you both so much. Your advice and kind words do help alot. Rylan did V* last winter and it was horrible he ended up in the ER because it wouldnt stop for two days. I ended up at my parents house "losing my mind". I ended up not being around him for a five days and then when that time passed I had to have my mom stay with me when I had him for three more days. I know if it would come down to it I have help here in town, but its the whole V* that makes me freak out. Hell be two tomorrow and hes in the terrible two stage but every time he acts up now I think he is going to V*. When he doesnt want to eat I dont make him but it makes me think hes going to V*. This is so hard to live with when you love someone so much youd do anything for them but you feel as a failure because you cant handle V*. My therapist pretty much doesnt understand and gave me intrustions to try and help me....but what they are is instructions for people getting off drugs....I found a book on amazon.com that is like a work book for anxiety IDK if itd be worth buying it but I guess it could help.
Thanks for everything
Sarah

[emetphob699]

I have a 2 year old myself. I will admit sometimes it's really hard. I have not so much a fear of v* itself but of Norovirus, specifically. So if he v*s from something like bouncing around too much or eating too many sweets at a birthday party or something, it doesn't bother me terribly, it's only when I think it "might be Norovirus" that I completely lose it. Norovirus has been going around my area for ages now, it seems like it will never go away.. so of course I've been on high alert for what seems like forever. Nights are the worst.. last time my son caught Noro it was 2 am when it started so now I have nights were I worry (either for no reason at all or because we've been exposed somehow) that he's gonna wake up v*ing. I just went through this on Saturday night, didn't sleep a wink because of it.

I wish I could offer you more help, I just wanted to let you know that you're not alone. I'm pretty sure all of us here have some anxiety where our kids (or someone else's) are concerned. I can only speak for myself when I say, for as much as I panic and worry about if it "might" happen, when it actually DOES happen with my son, I go into Mommy-mode and all I'm concerned about is helping him feel better. It's only after I've got him settled and he's calmed down and stuff that I start to feel a bit panicked. I'm sure that you'll end up feeling the same way soon enough. I know it must be harder being that he's not your own child, but you'll get there the more you bond with the child.

Good luck hon, whether you believe it or not, you CAN do this. I promise.

[SarahV]

Thank you. as of today idk whats going on, my world is spinning out of control.

[emmalinda]

my mum used to be a nanny and i would babysit for her sometimes. i never used to get too concerned with them getting sick until one day one of them did and ever since, i've been so scared of him doing it again. everytime he made a noise, sat differently or even coughed, I would think he would v*. so i can underestand your fear of him doing it again. But i'll just tell you that its very rare if he will if you're controling most of his environment and what he eats and everything. He sounds like a very healthy boy and you should be proud you're taking such good care of him. over time i think you will worry a bit less with him getting sick cause thats what happened with me. after a while i realised it is generally rare. i was still aware but less concerned and was able to be more carfree and less anxious around him. does your partner know about your phobia? it would be good to have someone to talk to for reassurance

[SarahV]

Thank you very much that is a comfort knowing you have the same problem and its geeting better. Yeah my BF knows i have this problem i dont think he completly understands. I havent been home since last friday Ive been staying with my family. Had the kid for a few hours today while i had my mom and sister here and i still freaked out. The Dr, is changing my pristiq to luvox on monday to help with the obsessive compulsive thoughts and the seroquel for the anxiety. hope this meds help.