What happened when you were around 9?

[Jdpillow]

When I was 8 I had a terrible sv* that made me have creepy hallucinations because of the fever. I think this could have something to do with my phobia but I was already phobic and this wasn't the first time I had hallucinations with a sv*. It is crazy though to see all these stories.

[Erica1649]

Also, I was talking to my mom about when I started that therapy, I was bullied in school around 2nd grade by this girl...she made my life a living hell....thats when I became known as the girl with the "stomach aches"

[EMF1300]

This thread is really cool! I also became emet when I was about 8 or 9.

I remember being 7 years old in first grade and a boy in my class v*d on the floor and I wasn't even phased by it, nor do I remember smelling it. But then when I was in second grade, a boy in my twin brother's class next door v*d and they came to sit in the back of the class. I remember panicking that my brother would catch sv* and all of the kids were talking about how bad it had smelled. My heart started pounding and I was terribly n* and from then on I would always be n* during class and spend countless hours of everyday in the nurses office. I became truant and begged to be home schooled. This event I think triggered my emet and it stayed that bad until I finished elementary school. It's gotten a little more manageable in high school but it's still there.

[jbsmom]

Wow! Well, when i was 9 i remember being sick at school ALL day and asked my teacher to call my mom to come get me. She said she did but when I finally talked to my mom she said the teacher NEVER called her. Not only did she NOT call my mom but she also forced me to eat lunch. I was SOOOOO sick. I didnt V until i got home thank goodness. But I walked home in the rain and laid down on the couch freezing. I tucked my arms underneath me, i even remember watching a Sanford and Son rerun. I begged my older brother to call my mom and he wouldnt so i got up and while i was waiting for her to come to the phone i V*d all over the floor. Amazingly enough I felt better after. She came home and picked me up to take me to the doctor and when we were in the car she said you are cleaning that up when we get home. You should have made it to the bathroom. My mom wasnt a very good mother when it came to being sick. She always seemed angry when i got sick or she ignored me. One time when i was sick she left me in my room for days. She noticed that I didnt come out for a couple of days so she went in to check on me and had to take me to the hospital cause i was so dehyrated. Back to the story, I didnt have to clean it up cause my Daddy came home and did it. She got mad at him and said she was trying to teach me a lesson. He said that was no lesson when you are sick. I dont think this one incident is the reason for my emet though. I had salmonella when i was like 7 yrs old. That was tough. I think i have always had this. I can tell you every time I have ever V*d. I can tell you every time my brothers ever V*d. I honestly think i have been this way since i was like 5.

[fixxxer2012]

nothing happened to me at age 9.

[Pedworgan]

When i was 10 i got a sv* in the middle of the night. I was very ill and i remember being very scared at first, my dad couldnt' look after me because he was busy trying to clean all the mess i had made. I remember v* in my sleep, i woke up doing it. i was still half asleep and went to tell my dad. Then i had a bath to wash of v* and v* again when he carried me downstairs. He told me to go in the toilet. At this point i started feeling really ill, horrible stomach ache and i made more mess in the toilet and felt bad/scared even more.
Luckily my Gran came over and helped look after me until it stopped and i went to sleep, i remember pretty clearly the last time i v* and i felt better after.
This was a year or so after my parents split up, they were getting divorced at the time.
This is where i can pinpoint my fear of v* beginning. I remember it clearly what happened and i remember being phobic from then onwards.
for he remainder of my primary school years i was 'the weird kid' , i used to get relief from panic attacks by literally running out the classroom, being outside in the fresh air helped.
When i went to secondary or i suppose high school its called elsewhere, a lot of changes happened. New school being one, my baby half brother was born and we moved house with my mum. I was far far better with my phobia for 5 years or so after. But recently it has become worse. My grandad became ill with cancer last year and died. I had problems eating and my stomach issues flared up again. I have lost more weight since, i am 18, weigh little over 8 stone and am about 5 foot 10 tall.
I have not v* since that night. I still have problems though, and i find i am scared of going to the toilet when i feel ill, i think it must be connected to my experience that night.

[annaki]

so odd, i just saw this thread.....my family all had noro when i was 9, on christmas eve. i was sick so many times and never once made it to the bathroom. i still can't v in a bathroom. i prefer to be elsewhere in a bucket/trashcan. but this is so weird and probably not coincidental. i think my serious emet started somewhere around 16 though. but 9 was the first time i really remember having a sv in which i v'd many times. and i remember my sister and dad doing it too. i can remember vivid details even though its been over 20 years!

[Erica1649]

so odd, i just saw this thread.....my family all had noro when i was 9, on christmas eve. i was sick so many times and never once made it to the bathroom. i still can't v in a bathroom. i prefer to be elsewhere in a bucket/trashcan. but this is so weird and probably not coincidental. i think my serious emet started somewhere around 16 though. but 9 was the first time i really remember having a sv in which i v'd many times. and i remember my sister and dad doing it too. i can remember vivid details even though its been over 20 years!

I have to V* in the toilet...that way the water alters the look of it if that makes sense....I remember many a time as a kid I sometimes never made it to the bathroom lol not fun!

[applebug]

my earliest memories of panic attacks and bad v* situation experiences started when I was 9.. I was in 4th grade and two experiences in particular stick with me. The first was one day at school, my teacher was in a chair reading a book to us, while we were sitting on the floor in front of her. A student suddenly v* in his lap, without warning.. The teacher saw him, and just stuck a trash can in his face.. I remember crawling backwards in panic trying to get as far away from everyone as I could. I remember just being very scared, and just thinking "get away from him, get away from him".. I think that's the first panic attack I can remember having. The second happened later that same year, the 4th grade took a trip to the state capital. It was a 5 hour bus ride. I remember a few days before the trip, I was really nervous and I didn't want to go because I was afraid someone would get sick on the bus.. I remember telling a friend of mine too, and her reassuring me that nobody would. The day of the trip came, and I remember not wanting to let go of my mother, I didn't want to leave her and get on that bus. She eventually convinced me that everything would be fine, she'd see me in a couple of days and she said goodbye... I got on the bus, and we left. About an hour in the the trip.. one row behind me, on the opposite side that I was sitting, 2 chaperons were gathered around a girl with some ice on her forehead and a bag.. I asked what was wrong, and one mother told me she felt sick. I panicked. I felt so trapped on that bus. I heard her do it, and I covered my ears and closed my eyes, and my friend that I sat next to thought it was funny, and she did it too, smiling, she made a game out of it. This repeated throughout the whole trip, the girl was sick.

Those both happened when I was 9, and although I think I may have already been emet before those situations, those are my earliest memories of having panic attacks.. or even remembering someone getting sick around me.

[stoneskipper]

I was already showing signs of having the phobia, but age 9 was the last time I got sick, and I think the phobia got much worse around that time. Also, my mom is an alcoholic, and it was around that time, that year and the next couple years, that her drinking got really out of control and scary.

[jess_colleen]

I think my emet started off as separation anxiety from my mum when i started school at 4 years old and then evolved into emet after a boy in my class was s* behind me in class and everyone made fun of him. I was so scared after that incident that if i was s* then everyone would make fun of me too.

[Laonfait]

When I was 9, my father was blamed for cheating with my moms sister which caused 3 fights, made us move out, and live with my great aunt, all in under 1 hour. Probably the start of my mental issues. My emet came when I was 14 xD

[MelissaDougal]

Im 19 now and the last time I V* was when I was 9. I couldnt make it to the bathroom even though the bathroom was the next room over next to mine, I have only V* 4 times in my life and 3 times were on that day. I believe that my phobia comes from the fear of not knowing what its like anymore to actually v*

[Lintu]

I was 9 when my emetophobia started. It was 3 days after Christmas in 4th grade and I went to bed with a horrible stomachache and woke up v*ing in my room. I was so ashamed when I went to tell my parents, and I couldn't keep down Pepto. They put me on the couch and went to clean up and I could hear my mom say "S***." I felt so sad and embarrassed. I've been emetophobic ever since.

[beautyandthefish]

This is amazing that this is all at age nine...

For me, when I was 9 my current teacher passed away in the middle of the year. Not long after that my sister was admitted to the hospital for attempting suicide!

Seems like things that happen around then seem to stay with us...

[Kyass]

I grew up with an obnoxious, attention-seeking uncle. He had diabetes and insisted that his wretching consist of the loudest, most obnoxious heaving sounds he could muster when he fell ill. I still have nightmares of him v*. Then when I was around 10, my cousin became sick with lupus, and then died a year later. She was constantly n* and v*. Then my uncle died. Then my sister was diagnosed with cancer, which put her in chemotherapy, and that's when she started getting ill all the time, and that's when I noticed I had emetophobia. I grew up around constantly sick people, and I think the sound is what bothers me the most. When my sister died, my grandmother fell ill a year later with the same v* problem, and she died this past May. I blame my uncle, not that there's anyone to really blame.

[angelyork]

Well, I have shed some tears reading your stories what a terrible time some of you have had.

I just worked out my dates, and this was my 9 year old situation... about 2 weeks before my 9th birthday we moved house - just mum, me and my older brother (single parent since my birth, won't go into all the detail right now). We had been living with mum's sister (also single parent, 2 kids, one my age, one a year younger). So, new school, no friends, absolutely NO money (curtains for blankets, only able to heat one room etc) but hey, we were all used to that. So, around a month after we moved mum met a lovely man, he came around lots, brought us chocolate and cherryade, he was great. I remember waiting in the upstairs window, looking out for him coming. Sometime between then and June I ate some laburnam(sp) seeds (my friend came running over to me in the garden with what looked like runner beans and said look what I just found in that lady's garden and we ate them. She didn't say look what I just picked off the tree in that lady's garden. And I was only 9 ). My friend went home with an old coffee jar full of the b****y things. So later that evening my mum gets a phone call, my friend has been taken to hospital, her mum had obviously found the coffee jar. Mum asked me if I had eaten any and I was so scared of getting in trouble that I said no. I went to bed. Mum woke me about 10.30pm and asked me again. She said my friend was very ill in hospital and was having her stomach pumped and that if I had eaten some and didn't tell that I wouldn't wake up in the morning. I would die. So I had to admit it, and was immediately carted off to hospital by mum and her new boyfriend. They made me drink the horrible, gloopy, orange flavoured syrup, telling me that it would make me s***. We waited, and waited... nothing. They got a wheelchair and started wheeling me through the never-ending corridors to the wards. As we got on to the ward I started to feel the n*, and was frightened. Then the person wheeling me decided to stop and chat (with another member of staff). So, there I am, feeling really s* sat in a wheelchair with a little bowl on my lap and adults stood around me and loads of kids in beds and parents sat around. Right in the middle of the ward, it started. I was soooo embarassed and scared. I was put in a bed right next to my friend. She seemed fine, and they let her go home first thing in the morning. I kept being s* so they wouldn't let me go, I had to stay in the rest of the day. The pain and fear I felt watching my mum leave that morning (and my friend) was awful.

Now that I have really thought about that whole episode, I think I can finally say that that is when the emet really started. Obviously, I have always assumed it had something to do with it, but after reading all of your posts and the whole age 9 thing, I'm now sure. I was like most of you, I always thought I'd been this way as long as I can remember, that I couldn't remember NOT being scared. But the real fear really did begin at this time. I had some fear and anxiety about it before that, but the terror started age 9.

There was another incident at age 4 that I think was the 'seed-planting' of the whole mess - it just so happened that reinforcement happened at what appears to be the worst possible time.

Thank you all for sharing.

[JellyBn83]

For me, I can think back to my first memory. I was a little over 3, sitting on the floor, looking up at my mother. She was there, with so much pain, anger, sadness in her face...because my dad was upstairs, v* badly! It was because he was going through chemotherapy. It was awful. I can still see my mother's eyes...so much worry! I carry that image in my head and it only comes out when I feel n* or think I am going to v*.

[mommyto3]

wow, this thread is amazing. it has brought a lot of tears to my face, along with some own personal realizations. i just keep rereading everyones stories...and here is my 9 story...actually starts at age 6, leads up to 9 where my emet raged..didnt know what it was back then, but now i understand.

*MAY BE GRAPHIC....ADULT SITUATIONS INVOLVED*****

when i was in kindergarten near the end of the school year, a hall monitor from my high school who volunteered at my elementary school started taking me into the bathroom and forced me to preform sexual acts...oral...until i v*. this happened a few times a month during the school year until i was in 4th grade. during this time i had a couple of sv* as my parents were never hygienic. every time i would v* my mom and dad would scream at me as if i was doing the worst thing ever. this added to my understanding of v* indeed being the worst thing ever since how it happened to me on the regular was traumatic. when i was 9 my baby sister was born, we moved and i thought that i was away from this for good. but about 2 months after we had gotten settled into our new home, i got a sv*...all night, it was awful...of course i was older so my parents just let me be alone all night. it was doubly as difficult because just as i thought i had gotten away from it, there it was. my emet was "average" until i had my oldest daughter and it spiraled out of control..have made much progress since then.

even in my early teen and teen years tho, i hid my emet with promiscuity and drinking/marijuana. i think those were my coping mechanisms but when i became a mommy, i obviously couldnt and didnt want to participate in those activities. thats really when it all surfaced, came out of my subconscious and reared its very evil head onto me. my weight has been up to 210lbs, down to 90...the past 6 years have been a rollercoaster for me, and it is time it gets evened out.

somehow tho, through everything, i have managed to have 3 beautiful children, an amazing man who knows every secret and detail about what really makes up me, i have graduated college, deal with an autistic, and am blessed with the amazing gift of being a stay at home mom.

im glad ive found this place, its a soft place to land, a place to feel a part of something, without feeling left out or different.

thank you everyone for sharing their stories, i hold them all dear in my heart

[ogmoth]

I actually think that my phobia stems from a traumatic birth experience. I am adopted and when I was born my birthmother did not want to see me. I had a lot of fluid in my lungs and they had to stick a tube down my throat to get it out. There was no one there to comfort me and of course I can't really know for sure but I was probably terrified. I also have other issues that seem to stem from this incident. I don't think the phobia started later because I can remember every incidence of someone v*ing from the time I was 3. Oddly, I hardly remember myself doing it at all. My mother says that when I was a toddler about 1 or 2 years old I would stick my fingers down my throat and v* and that I was fascinated by it.

When I was 8 I had another incident that may be related to my phobia. I was spending the day with my cousin who I hated. I was very angry and so I was carelessly eating my mozzarella sticks. I choked. I hardly remember anything about it except for being very scared. After that I was unable to eat properly for months because I was afraid of choking. I only ate liquidy and crunchy foods and my diet had to be supplemented with ensure.

When I was 9 9/11 happened. I was just beginning 5th grade and I had the "pleasure" of watching the whole thing go down across the river from my classroom window. My mom worked a few blocks away and I was scared that she wouldn't come home. I'm not convinced this has anything to do with my emetophobia though.

[starlit_galaxies]

I got sick about four times one winter, I think when I was eight... I'm pretty sure that's where it started.