Quote Originally Posted by afraid213 View Post
I can't live like this any more....why is there no hope? Why do I have to leave walmart in the middle of grocery shopping,leave without my damn food just because I feel "sick" this is bullshit. Excuse my language but I've had enough of this phobia. I can't deal with it anymore. I can't eat a freaking thing without feeling "nauseous" and even though I know I've felt this everyday of my life and haven't thrown up but I STILL can't eat without feeling sick. I still can't go to sleep at night without worrying I'm gonna wake up and throw up. Even though I haven't in 15 freaking years...yet I sit andd worry CONSTANTLY over my stomach and throat and this last 3 days has been nothing but excuciating anxiety and I just can't take it anymore. I'm so mad at myself for all of this..because it is my mind taking me over and I'm mad that I don't have the strength to stop it. I think about dying everyday just because of how I feel. And I can't even take meds to get better because of the anxiety it causes me...I just don't know what to do. I'm at the jumping off place here. I hate what I have become and how much my life has been ruined because of this
I have been there, and at times I still do. I used to run out of places as soon as I felt off....every once in a while I still do....However, I remember once i was shopping at Target, and suddenly freaked out and wanted to run out of there. Instead, I stopped, took a few breaths and FORCED myself to stay, finish shopping, and pay. I swear, while waiting on line I thought I was going to jump out of my skin. Anyhow, I paid for my stuff, and calmly walked to my car. I felt so good that I didn't let it control me, so I continued to do it more and more. Go for small victories... they help a lot and lead to more of them.